Young people

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Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies

replies: 51

Hi! Just thought I’d make a post with some tips for study. I know this is something we can all struggle with. These are all suggestions so feel free to take them or leave them! Hope they help! If you only remember one thing, let it be this: You are important. Your grades don’t define you. (support) Studying can feel isolating but know you’re not alone! Reach out – and find or make friends that can support you along the way. If you’re having trouble finding some friends, join some local communities or clubs! They have lots at Uni’s and even stuff like open days are great ways to meet new people and find out what’s happening. Study groups can also be a great way to meet people and stay motivated. Also remind yourself why you’re doing this; inspirational wallpapers or quotes can be super inspiring. Remember the saying about the oxygen mask? If you can’t take care of yourself first studying will be harder. You are important. You know the drill - water, food, exercise, sleep. Try to stay calm. Stuff that might be able to help include mindfulness, breathing exercises, colouring in, going for walks, journaling, listening to music… If you’re struggling – reach out. See a therapist. Talk to your student counsellor. If you need help, don’t be afraid to ask for it. Also lots of Universities and TAFE offer disability services – which includes conditions like Depression and Anxiety. (study) Find the right study space for you. Maybe that’s in your room, or a coffee shop, or the library. Some people find that noise helps; other people not so much. If you like particular kinds of noise, you can find ‘coffee shop’ noise or ‘rain sounds’ to help concentrate. Make a plan. It helps to do it often so it becomes a habit. Anytime you get a due date, write it down. Maybe you could use a diary, planner, bullet journal or an app. I find the 30/30 App helpful - study for a bit and then break for a bit. You can also get add-on’s for your computer to block sites like Facebook if you find them too distracting. Find out what study technique works for you. Do you like cue cards? Mind maps? Colour coding? Does highlighting stuff help you remember? Charts, maps, diagrams? Recorded lectures? Goals! These are so important – not just writing down deadlines but rewarding yourself for meeting them. Even making smaller goals like ‘read two pages from a textbook’ can help. Break it down into bite size pieces, and don’t forget to reward yourself after!

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first

replies: 0

The Young People space is a sub-forum within the wider Beyond Blue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss anxiety, depression and other related life issues. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this forum is a space for younger people to connect and provide peer support for each other. 2. Content from this sub-forum is displayed on both the beyondblue and youthbeyondblue websites. 3. Please bear in mind that some members find content relating to suicide and/or self-harm distressing or triggering. If you would like to post on these topics, please do so in our Suicidal Thoughts and Self Harm section. Please see also our guidelines for making posts on this topic. Posts made here in the Young People sub-forum containing content relating to suicide and/or self-harm will be moved. 4. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straightaway. Information on how our system works can be found here. Being familiar with our community rules can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. 5. This is a peer support community, and to get the best out of being here we recommend that you 'give support to receive support'. More on how that works here.

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My boyfriend wants me to stop clubbing cause he has anxiety

replies: 1

I've been with him for a year now and every time I go out without him he get assumes that I got tragic drunk and that I cheated on him. He says he trusts me but it's his anxiety that makes him freak out. He wants me to stop going without him (also he hates clubs). All my friends go (even some without their boyfriend). I know it's controlling of him, but he claims his anxiety makes him like that (I don't know if he's blaming his insecurity on his anxiety - that's probably bad of me to say) and it's selfish of me to choose clubbing over our relationship - I'm only fighting it cause he's making me choose when I shouldn't have to and I've done nothing wrong. Should I stop clubbing so he doesn't have panic attacks?How can I help his anxiety so he'll be okay with it? If anyone has any opinion or advice, I would really appreciate it. Thanks

so done

replies: 4

Hi y'all, I'm struggling with school, like a lot. I'm really behind. I'm in year 10 and I can't see myself graduating, or um living long enough to graduate. I feel like there's no point in any of my subjects or school in general and right now it's all I'm doing with my life. As soon as some motivation comes to do my best it is gone almost instantly and I'm left tired and depressed. I'm getting help and support from my school and psychologists but I feel so isolated and like no one actually understands how sad I am and how much I'm so done with life at this point. I also have only two environments: my house where my mum is constantly pressuring me and there is no way to escape from my family or other people, and school. Each day seems to mold into each other. I can't drive or get away to study somewhere else because I'm only 14. I'm too far behind at school to have time for hobbies. My mum would never let me go to a friend's house or anything. Sorry this is pretty poorly written lol I just wanted to talk.

Long distance relationship with depressed partner

replies: 2

My boyfriend and I we know each other for 3,5 years. We started of as colleagues at work over the last 10 month a friendship grew. At for now 2 month we are in a relationship. He works and lives now 4 hours away, which means we only see each other on weekends and sometimes just every second weekend. All this is fine as we knew what we head into right at the beginning. I always knew that he suffers from depressions and that he is on medication and also saw a psychologist. However last week he told me he went off his medication for about 5 month now, which I didn’t know. But he said he feels good and not stressed anymore so he stopped taking them. Last week he got told by his boss that he won’t have a job with them after Easter. I first thought he took it really well and stayed positive and looked for new jobs. He even talked about moving closer again. That happened on the Monday, since Tuesday he has changed. He barely talks, he seems really tired, doesn’t want to know about anything. He is t showing the same affection anymore, he is trying to get me to make other plans for the weekends where we had planes to see each other. And he told me he started drinking again (1carton beer in 3days) over the last 10 month he didn’t drink at all. I‘m at a point where I don’t know what to do or how to help. I don’t know what i can say and what not. Can I say I miss him? Or puts that more pressure on him? Should I give him the space he needs? If I ask if everything is ok or if he wants to talk I always get short answers like no all good. I have never been with a partner that had depression. And the fact that we only see each other on the weekends doesn’t help at all. I thought about writing him a letter to let him know how I feel about him and about all the things I love about him and how they make me feel. I love him but I’m unsure about his feelings at the moment as he seems to push me away and I don’t want to annoy him or pressure him in any way. I appreciate any advise as I‘m really unsure about the situation at the moment as i have never experienced it before. Thank you

At rockbottom

replies: 2

I think I have reached breaking point. My anxiety is off the charts constantly, learning a new job and all the training, knowing that I need to get this job or everything has to be put on hold, just ahh. I think I am pushing myself way to much and it has hit that point where I am crumbling and I don’t know what to do or who to talk to. My job was fine before this new aspect of it but then again I need it to get this job and I think I have been expecting so much out of myself and I’m not living up to my own expectations. I’m my own worst enemy. I’m at one of my lowest points right now and it’s like, I know I can learn it but it’s just not happening. My body have given up and it feels like there is nothing I can do about that. I know that I am being hard on myself. I am only 20 and learning council shit but that’s the thing, I’m only 20 and I am a very emotional sensitive person so everything goes straight to my head. But because of this, I am pushing away the people at work because I don’t want to do more training, I don’t want to be told that I’m doing it wrong and I don’t even wanna know if I’m doing it right. I’m just done

Need some help

replies: 2

Within the last two months I met a girl who I got along with quite well. We talked abit and even hung out two or three times. I started to get feelings for this girl but it seemed like in the span of a few days she lost interest. Which is fine on her behalf because she didn’t really owe me anything and all, I did feel abit betrayed just because it happened at the snap of a finger and there was no warning. For the next 3-4 weeks I was feeling real down in ways I had never felt before, I thought I had known what it was like to feel sad/depressed before but for some reason this one really hit me hard and I was quite taken back from it just because I really hadn’t known her that long. I told a few friends that I was feeling down but not the extent of how I was really feeling, they helped and all as much as they could but it was still those times when I was alone in my own thoughts which tourtured me. Anyways In those weeks I had deleted this girl off a few social media just cause I was sick of seeing here but a few weeks later she added me back and started talking to me again. I thought she was just trying to be nice so I went along with it Aswell with the hope that she wanted me again. This talking progresses for about two weeks where she even asked to set up a day where me and my friends could see her and her friends. It was all going well until that same thing happened where she went cold on me in the matter of a day or so. This really had me down In the dumps again. From prior knowledge I know she had a guy that she used to see but they didn’t anymore but I feel as if she still wants and every time she feels as if she is not getting attention from him or whatever she comes to me for some validation and when he does come back around she gives me the flick, that’s what I think would explain how she goes so cold on me. I was just wondering for some outside perspective on what you believe this situation may be and what steps I should take into further helping my mental health. I’ve been really grey lately about the whole situation and it has started to affect my social life

I'm so confused right now, and i want other peoples thoughts.

replies: 3

So basically i am 17 and i am still in high school, it all started off at the starting off 2018 where i done a bunch of weed with one of my friends.. from that day forward i never felt like the same person ever again, i started to have chest issues and i was stressing more than usual and i was experiencing extreme anxiety, to the point where i was scared to go watch a movie with my friends because i thought i would have a heart attack because of the loud sounds (i know sounds stupid), everything was adding up to my stress, i was doing bad in school due my head being a constant fog and my concentration was terrible as well, my own family played an enormous part in my stress, not because they weren't supportive (i do love my mother, she tries really hard to support us) but me and my older brother would always fight and every time he was around me i would just crumble into a dark pit of misery, I just could never EVER get close with my brother, for some reason i just want to be as far away from him as possible, to the point where i don't want to ever see his face again, and i am not feeling this way because of hatred but because of the absolute fear that i will end up like him... sad, depressed, and miserable. I thought my life would never be the same. So around the mid 2018 mark i started to notice something, nothing around me felt real, i started to get paranoid over the fact that everything around me was a either a simulation or I entered an alternate universe or something (paranoia is a scary thing), but after i while i was told that because of the massive amount of stress i was under my brain wanted a way out, so the only way it could do that was by locking itself in a cage, basically i was feeling this way because my brain had enough and wanted to escape. So this took a long time to recover on but we now reach the starting of 2019 when i finally think my life is coming back together again and I'm at the point where i am finally at peace with myself and my thoughts. That's until me and family found out that my brother is now suffering with cancer, this is so hard for me to handle because he thinks I am the only rational person he could talk to (because of the chemo he has suffered some manic episodes), the weird thing is, is the fact that i feel as though i feel nothing anymore, just yesterday my brother sad on his bed and cried in agony and i didn't even know what to feel. I wasn't angry, i wasn't happy, i wasn't sad....I just don't know anymore.

Need advise .I am really stress due to this.

replies: 3

I am in love with a man.While working together at work place we both started liking each other but hardly talked to each other.Initially I was totally unaware of this but I gradually I started noticing that he likes me and I started liking him and it got intense by the time while seeing each other everyday but we hardly talked to each other once or twice.It sounds weired but this is the fact.There was always a lack of communication from his side.While doing bit of enquiry about him I found out he is a gay and was in relationship with someone for 15 years but no one at work know it.His behavior was bit different than others like lack of communication and bit quite side in his behavior .We have each other 's mobile numbers but never talked to each other .I messages him first time at his mobile and he blocked me and then unblock me and still checking my times on WhatsApp and following me during those times.I messaged him 2 more times to wish on New year but no reply from his sides but his behavior was same which shows he likes me but don't reply my messages.Now because I have left my previous company and joined an another company.The situation and bond between us is still same I can feel it but its really hard to communicate with him.I have tried couple of times.I can change my number but this is the only connection between us at this stage .And I am afraid t to loose this connection but it is hurtful and painful when he doesn't respond the messages but still shows he likes me . I am assuming it just his backound life stopping him to send me a message because according to him I don't know anything.And he doesn't know that I know everything and still feel the same about him but I can't tell him because he doesn't communicate with me.I want to talk to him or catch for coffee but how ?This is so hurtful.I don't know what to do ?

What happens when you don’t know?

replies: 11

I’m getting pretty sick of things, not gonna lie. I just don’t know how to feel, how to act anymore. School started up, which brang some new drama, and issues. (Y’know, all the good stuff) Its just making me feel more and more sick of everything, like, I’m ok, but, am I? Im just really confused, i want it be ok, I want to be positive like the other girls, I want to be happy like the other girls, but, I can’t. I wanna be different, I want to change, but I can’t, and that’s getting to me. I want to be like the other kids, and, for the most part, I’m not. Why does that get to me? The other kids can be happy, feel happy, and I can too, but, theres something different, I feel fake Does anyone know how to handle school, and kids, things like that? (I don’t really know anymore, taking things in your stride stops working after you start to realise it. Getting through the school day is getting harder to manage, and, considering I’ve barely started, is gonna be difficult to keep up with.) Would be much appreciated, Sam

Giving up on finding work.

replies: 4

Hey guys, it's been way too long since I've posted here (5-6 months give or take) While my schooling problems have subsided (I did very well in conquering them if anyone was wondering!), a new problem has arisen. Ever since I graduated in November 2018, I have been struggling to find part-time/casual work. Given how long the holidays have been, I thought it would give me something to do and will also serve as a stepping stone for finding a job after University. Unfortunately, I have never had a job up until this point and because I live in Adelaide; a city known for its inadequate job opportunities, things are looking even worse on my end. I have checked Seek and Indeed daily for the last few months and, whenever I apply for a job, I will more than likely get an email saying that I have not progressed to an interview (It would probably be 100+ times now that I've received these emails). The only type of work that I feel is best for me is retail as I have a multitude of reasons why working in fast food is terrible. I got some help from one of my teachers on how to write an effective resume but even then, it probably doesn't look as good as say, someone who has worked in a casual position for a few years. I could go on about how much of a joke it is to find a job these days, but frankly I don't want to bore any of you with my sob story. I think really all I have to ask is, what am I doing wrong?

Anxiety about Relationship

replies: 2

I have been with my boyfriend for almost nine months now. The first seven months were completely blissful, we fell very deeply in love and we still are deeply in love. However, just before the new year I had a panic attack while talking to him. Since then, I’ve been filled with fear about the future of our relationship. he was the first guy I’ve ever been with, and was my first for everything from holding hands to kissing to sex. He is completely wonderful and amazing, and although our opinions differ somewhat, it’s nothing major and doesn’t put a strain on our relationship at all. These thoughts started as ‘do I really love him’. that lasted for about three weeks. I realised I did love him, so very very very much. He is an incredible man and he is incredible to me. He does have flaws, but so do I and we communicate through the minor frustrations very easily. Now my thoughts have turned to ‘it’s either we stay together forever or we break up’. I see a future with him very clearly, but I’m still scared. Mostly of myself. I know how strong his love and commitment and loyalty is. I think it’s me I’m concerned about; do I love him enough, will I ever fall out of love, am I falling out of love by worrying about this all the time? Is this worrying a sign it’s not meant to be? Will I waste my time? Am I wasting his time? when we are together everything is fine and normal and wonderful and loving 99% of the time. The other 1% is when I’m reminded briefly of my thoughts and feel incredibly guilty about ever having them. It makes me feel like I don’t deserve him, he deserves much more than me and it must not be meant to be if I had them at all at the same time I am very aware love is both a feeling and a choice. I choose to love him, and I will choose him over and over and over despite the anxiety telling me to break up with him to rid him of me or rid me of this turmoil. My gut feeling is that despite anything we will end up back with each other. My intuition tells me this is something to hold on to and never let go of. When I’m not constantly overthinking or ruminating I feel very content and at peace with him and I love him very intensely. I just want what’s best for him, I want to make him the happiest guy in the world because he makes me so incredibly happy and feel so loved and cherished. these constant thoughts of ‘what if he isn’t the one’ constantly plague me and make me feel guilty. I want to choose love over fear, I believe he’s my happy ending

Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies replies: 51

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first replies: 0

My boyfriend wants me to stop clubbing cause he has anxiety replies: 1

so done replies: 4

Long distance relationship with depressed partner replies: 2

At rockbottom replies: 2

Need some help replies: 2

I'm so confused right now, and i want other peoples thoughts. replies: 3

Need advise .I am really stress due to this. replies: 3

What happens when you don’t know? replies: 11

Giving up on finding work. replies: 4

Anxiety about Relationship replies: 2