I’m new and nervous

[LQ23]

Hi I’m not sure where to start I’ve let the people I care about down and don’t know how to make it right

[LQ23]

Hi AS I was feeling a little better today but something has taken over me now - I’ve just thought about my daughter and the consequences it will have for her - she has a great job at her old school part time is at Uni studying and I’m about to ruin her life like I’ve done to myself - I hope that people don’t let this affect her - I’m so worried now and feel like it’s all hopeless

[Aaronsis]

Hi LQ23

I am so sorry you are feeling so overwhelmed with the thoughts about what is going to happen when your daughter finds out...can I suggest a few things and I am not sure what you think but firstly your daughter knows you very very well and also is an adult, she will see that you have made a mistake, she will see that you have done everything that you can to make amends for your actions and that you are both very sorry and very remorseful for what you have done...but this is not who you are as a person, this one mistake does not define the rest of your life or who you are as a person, you are still her mother whom she loves. I also want to say that although you are her mother, your mistakes are not her mistakes, just as her mistakes are not yours. You can be there to support each other but usually people are quite reasonable and understand that this really has nothing to do with her and therefore should have no recourse on her. I hear how panicked you are by this but she is an adult and will understand that you have made a mistake, I think I may have mentioned this before too, I think it would be great if you are able to be the one to tell her, I think she will receive this information if she feels like you can show her the place she has in your life and that you want to let her know what you have done. It would be hard I would think for her to hear it from someone else and wonder why you didn't tell her.

I hope that you are able to get a hug off your parents today and take a moment to breathe and be kind to you. You have so very much going on and I am glad you are in a place of love and support.

Hugs to you LQ23

AS

[LQ23]

Hi AS it’s like the walls are closing in today. My husband is supporting me but said he has to look after our daughter as well. For the first time I reality has set in and I feel that I will be going to jail! I deserve too for what I have e done - I am not a bad person or am I? It’s like a haze and a fuzzy cloud and it won’t go away - I want to so bad try and make it up to the people I have let down especially my old job whom I stole off. It’s just such a mess

[monkey_magic]

Hi LQ23,

I hope u don't mind me posting.

I don't think you're a bad person. I think you're a good person that's made a mistake. You are willing to make up for your mistake, show remorse and care.

Are you sure you will do jail time over this instead of say community service. I'm not all that experienced with the justice system but I really hope they go easy on you. As you've said you're willing to pay it back.

I know it's stressful but take some breaths and keep practicing the self care that you're doing.

I wish u all the best and I hope for the best possible outcome for you.

[Ben_L]

Sorry to hear this is happening stay positive

[MyLadyGirl]

Hi LQ23,

Don't think that your action will impact your daughter. Your daughter is wise and she is there supporting you. She is happily living and earning her money. She is caring to you. Please recall me, as you said she is aware and she has not done anything opposite but being there to you. It shows that she love you alot and do not want you to be upset and be down. Making you realise your mistake shows you a great mother you are and a role model to her.

[LQ23]

Hi AS today I am feeling a bit anxious my sister is coming to visit me - we haven’t been very close but always there when needed! I also feel anxious about talking to my daughter about my illness and want to know the best way to tell her that - every time I think of it I can feel my heart racing and I start shaking x

[LQ23]

Hi Ben L thank you for your post today I’m feeling quite anxious and don’t know why all of a sudden - I feel safer when I am asleep in bed and it feels like this is a bad dream and that it will go away when I wake up - I’m also anxious to tell people outside of my family I am not well - it feels quite daunting

[LQ23]

Hi there long time that I haven’t spoken to anyone as been trying to work in a new job and do a good job.... my issue now has reared its ugly head ... my old boss has reported me to the Police and now i have to give a police interview in the next couple of days my lawyer has advised me what to do but I’m just so nervous and full of dread

[Aaronsis]

Hello LQ23

It is great to hear from you again and so wonderful that you have been working and have started a new role. Well done as I know that not getting the one you applied for earlier on really made you feel insecure. I am so happy for you that you have found a role for you.

I hear how nervous you are with regards to the police interview, I am so glad you have the support of your Lawyer and that they are providing you also with direction and support on how to manage this situation. It would be very worrying and I am sure that you are playing all sorts of scenarios around in your head as to how this is going to turn out for you. I know this is so much easier said than done but, we don't know what is going to happen at the interview, we don't know what has been reported and how the interview will turn out. But what you can control is how you respond and how you try to cope on the day and to manage you in the best way possible. Take the advice on from your Lawyer and chat here as much as you need to. Do some nice things that make you feel good about yourself, as we said before, making a bad decision does not make you a bad person.

I can understand that it is easy to say all these things but very hard to try to keep a calm head and to try to remain focused on the facts and not run away with a whole story in your head that is not true.

I hope you have some support in your family and I am wondering how your daughter has responded to this as you were very worried about her finding out. Only if you want to share that is.

I hope to chat to you some more and to find out how you are feeling and what you have been doing to take care of you.

Hugs

Sarah xx