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Meet your community champions!

replies: 10

Hi everyone, We wanted to share with you the way that our wonderful Community Champions are here to support you. You may have noticed that a few of our Forums members are labelled ‘Community Champion’. Community Champions are volunteers within the Beyond Blue Forums who: have the time, skills and empathy to support other members regularly; help to welcome new members; are actively engaged members that help set the tone of our community. Our Community Champions are regular contributors to many conversations across the forums. They are a consistent and friendly voice that have committed to sharing their experience and expertise with this community. They are not health care professionals or clinicians. Like you, they have an experience with a mental health challenge or diagnosis – either for themselves or someone they care for. This forum is for people who understand what it feels like and have a lived and living experience of mental health challenges. Our Community Champions help everyone feel comfortable and confident by demonstrating what excellent peer support is all about. Click here to find out more about how you can become a Community Champion! This incredible team are excited to introduce themselves below, and we are sure you’ll see them around the forums in conversations important to you.

HELP..Am I posting in the right section?

replies: 10

Welcome to those who are considering posting for the very first time, welcome. Thought I would repost part of the words that Chris B posted awhile ago, (2014) as I can hear that people are unsure if they are posting in the right section or worried that they are posting "the wrong thing". 1.A good title makes the difference Just like a headline in a newspaper, when scanning the dozens of threads to click into, it’s only natural that people will choose the ones that resonate with them most. A title that entices the reader, or asks a question, is likely to get a better result than something non-descriptive like “Depression” or “I don't know what to do”. If you think you’re not good at choosing titles, leave it till last. Spend time writing your post, then perhaps choose a sentence from what you’ve written as the title. 2.Join in threads that have already been posted We all have our own unique stories, but part of the reason for joining a forum like this one is because you know that you will have a lot in common with others who are posting. Before starting a new thread, have a look through the current topics being discussed and see if there’s a conversation you can join in with. It can be quite common to have a handful of very similar threads happening at any one time, with members seemingly unaware that there are others right there who are going through the same thing. Talking to other members on their threads is a great way of getting yourself known so that when you post a thread of your own, people may respond quicker because they recognize your name. 3.Choose the most appropriate section for your post Many people browse the forums looking for stories specifically to do with pregnancy and parenting, employment, grief, loss, separation etc. Going straight for the “Depression” section may seem like the easiest option, but this section is often the busiest, so your post is more likely to get lost among the threads. Making good use of the different forum sections not only helps keep the forum relevant, but you’re more likely to find others who are going through the same experiences as you. Also, if you're wanting to discuss issues of trauma, abuse, suicidal thoughts or self-harm, it's really important you post in the designated section to avoid triggering others who may not wish to read about these topics. Mostly..just come and chat, we are here for you. Our amazing wizards in the background will see your message ends up in the right spot. Sarah

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Surviving abuse in a long marriage

replies: 4

Apparently my story is all too common. I was married to a covert narcissist for 50 years and now I have to learn how to be free. How do I find ‘survivor’ groups in Sydney… where are they?

Guess I just need to get it out

replies: 3

Hi I'm 61and I somehow thought that I would have sorted this stuff out by now. Oh I've got a few issues like most people but at the moment it's my job that's causing me the most stress. Due to my years of experience I was given a slightly more responsible position in my new job , however I am considerably older than everyone and initially was practically ignored and given menial tasks, to the point that I would drive home crying in my car . Then after a few weeks they realised I knew what I was doing and started berating me for "not stepping up" So I just kept to doing the less skilled tasks and excelling at them. Leading to more remarks. By this time I have lost all confidence in myself, I assume they all hate me , laugh at me and talk behind my back .So I start taking time off, more and more and I'm lying to my husband saying I'm going to work every day I handle the finances so he dosent realise. But this just makes me hate myself more , I can't bear him to look at me the same way they do so I don't tell him I am so tired all the time I can't sleep, I ve had anxiety and depression before and I can't bear to rock up to my GP and get the antidepressants that I can't tolerate. I don't think I'm a bad person, I would never intentionally make anyone else feel bad, so what is it about me that is unlikeable, I keep saying right pull yourself together and I can fake it but not for long. This reads a bit pathetic, I'm sorry

Help with pain from infidelity

replies: 5

I’m after some support from those who have experienced infidelity in their marriage. And those who have worked hard to salvage what they have. My husband cheated on me with a family friend and I caught them naked together (not engaged in sex). We have been working HARD for 4 weeks since I discovered the affair, and I truly believe we will work it out. Many factors lead to this (not self blaming...just being real). I could really benefit from support from those who have been through this and survived. I need guidance on the process, and how long I will feel this immense grief.

What now?

replies: 4

Hi, I was under therapy but as my area no longer bulk bills I cannot afford help anymore. I'm not sure where to turn. I need a place to vent.

I don’t know how to move forward

replies: 8

Hi my husband died last year after a long illness in which I cared for him myself at home. Because of this I was very much house bound for years as I had to get someone in to be with him if I want out. It had been my plan to do some travel with my daughter. I was even wanting to go to Russia and study art at the academy for term. But now it seems none of that will be possible for the foreseeable future. In fact it feels like I don’t have a future and I can’t get any answers that I need to be answered! My concern at the moment is I don’t want the vaccine….at least not the ones they have currently on offer. But will take Novavax or Covax if it becomes a situation that I can no longer do anything in society. I have deemed at both theses vaxes which are like the traditional ones are safe to use. I actually don’t care if they are effective. I will only take them so I can get my life back. Which I don’t feel is a good enough reason to take them! Then I will be signed up to this vax passport and all that goes with it with gov telling us to take anything they thing we should take. BTW I enjoy wonderful health and take no meds and am very natural in my approach. I feel not just my future but most peoples future is bleak and we are heading towards some sort of dystopian nightmare. I feel they are changing everything in this world now. It’s going to be a whole new ballpark for everyone. I can’t shake these feelings off. Nobody can convince me otherwise and most of my family and friends are seeing the same thing to a greater or lesser degree. They are either semi professional or professional people eg therapist, architect, teachers, computer programmers etc. What I am trying to do is to not go into denial about what’s coming down the pike but to try and feels less stressed and worried.

35 years married gone

replies: 4

Hi I’m new to this so bear with me. Really struggling with mental health, my husband has been seeing another woman and I’m in a world of hurt. It was initially an online thing with someone from his teens. I found out accidentally enemy going paper work for him snd promptly left. We reconciled after a 5 week break as he said he wanted me and our marriage to work but she is persistent even when he asks her not to call she fors and as far as I can tell will stop at nothing. Although I feel he enjoys the attention. we have been through so much together but now he seems willing to throw all of it away. He claims he loves me but loves her also. I have tried everything I can and feel desperate and depressed. Suicidal thoughts creep in constantly and I think I have just about exhausted friends and family. Sorry for the rant but a complete mess.

just want to text somethings out to feel a bit better, sorry if ur reading ;-;

replies: 6

I feel depressed these days, I've just gotten my reports back (I'm in high school) and I'm not within my mum's expectations. If I'm honest I don't think I have ever been within her expectations, she never thinks I'm good enough and I think I can finally realise that and face it... sigh Every time I get awards and achieve something that I feel proud of she will always say how she has been able to do that too but younger than me and how I wasn't able to do it as well and as fast as her. I don't think I will ever get up to her expectations, she has always been an allrounder in all subjects and I've only been able to get slightly above average (my grades have been going down a bit now) so way inferior to her. Now she wants me to move schools just because she thinks it is better and everyone there is successful, even tho she doesn't know that I have anxiety talking to people and I have finally made friends. I have so much trouble making friends and I can't even tell her about that. I have never talked to her about my wellbeing and I don't think I will ever be able to. All I do now is listen to sad songs, stare out the window, and study, I cant tell my friends because I'm not that close to them and I do not want to burden them by telling them. I can't tell my school because they will then tell my mum and nothing good will come out of that. now I feel really empty knowing that I just want to make my mum proud but I guess it isn't happening, not now not really ever.

Even just creating an account on here is stressful.

replies: 5

I'm stressed out just creating an online profile on here. I am burnt put from decades in an unsupportive workplace, stressed, anxious, depressed. Then the pandemic on top and the blatant disregard of authorities for those who have underlying medical issues - as if they are expendable - eugenics 21st century style. The world has become a horrible place and politicians so self serving and uncaring. Who wants to live in this world?

G'day everyone

replies: 6

Hey there. I'm Doberman38. Despite my name, I'm actually more of a cat person and have a bit of a dog phobia (I love dogs, but my brain doesn't want to let me, ugh), but I find dobermans quite interesting and a bit similar to me personality-wise. I also love animals in general, so I had to chose one of course! I've had major anxiety problems all my life and despite treatment it's still a real struggle. The craziness of the last two years has made me fall back on old fears and habits and I feel like I need a really supportive place right now. I am very willing to listen to advice and offer some to those who need it as well. I'm sure my time here will be very worthwhile. Cheers, Doberman.

Intro

replies: 6

Hi, First time poster here. Actually, I only signed up today so kinda thought I'd keep the ball rolling and jump into the deep end. I'm really not sure what to say so I guess I'll just start with a quick run down... 4 years ago, I flew back home to new Zealand where I looked after my Nana who was sick with my mum. It was such a difficult time. Nana was in her 80's and always so independent. A member of the badminton club, knitting club, volunteering at hospice and now she has difficulty getting out of bed, walking, you know, just doing your normal everyday things. She was in and out of hospital, having daily home visits by nurses etc Mum and I were away from everything familiar back in Oz. After about 4 months, I had to fly back as my daughter was turning 18. It was bitter-sweet leaving but I couldn't miss my girls birthday. After those months of sleepless nights, stress, feeling homesick, I let my hair down and celebrated my own birthday. I've always been the type who was never scared to be experimental, so this weekend was no different. Little did I know how much my life would change by making this choice. Amongst the cocktail of drugs I used, I tried meth. From that night on, I was hooked. As a result of that, my marriage suffered to the point that we separated after being together for 15 years. In the time we have been separated, my ex husband has been diagnosed with stage 4 colarectal cancer. The cancer hasn't responded to chemo and now it has metastasised and spread to most of his major organs and now reached his bones. We've been told by the specialist that he has 6-12 months if treated. The radiotherapy is pretty much to pro long his life and perhaps ease the pain a little. I'm not dealing well with this news. I've fallen off the wagon. I've tried giving up but I'm addicted. I don't have the tools I need to kick this habit. I have since had a baby who's 18 months old. He has given me focus, and a reason to live but I need help and I'm ready to ask for it.

Meet your community champions! replies: 10

HELP..Am I posting in the right section? replies: 10

Surviving abuse in a long marriage replies: 4

Guess I just need to get it out replies: 3

Help with pain from infidelity replies: 5

What now? replies: 4

I don’t know how to move forward replies: 8

35 years married gone replies: 4

just want to text somethings out to feel a bit better, sorry if ur reading ;-; replies: 6

Even just creating an account on here is stressful. replies: 5

G'day everyone replies: 6

Intro replies: 6