Hi, I’ve had depression and anxiety for around 5 years. I started seeing
a doctor and psychologist about it last year when I realized it was
heavily affecting me at work. For a long time I was telling myself that
I was just being a sook, I even thoug...
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Hi, I’ve had depression and anxiety for around 5 years. I started seeing
a doctor and psychologist about it last year when I realized it was
heavily affecting me at work. For a long time I was telling myself that
I was just being a sook, I even thought that some symptoms like being
tired all the time were normal, and I guess that’s what I was hearing
around me as well – things like: “cheer up, life’s not so bad”. This
year I started trying anti depressants, which have been amazing for
sleep, but not seeing any improvements with mood, now waiting to see
where to go next with medication. It also wasn’t until this year that I
have started talking about it with friends and family. The sessions with
the psychologist are hard, I’m doing everything she’s suggesting and I
think the hardest thing is not seeing any results yet, seems like a huge
amount of effort that’s not really going anywhere. I know I need to work
on my communication skills, I feel a lack of deep and meaningful
friendships where we would have common interests and really get to know
each other, the friendships I have feel so shallow right now. I’ve gone
out a lot this year, pushed through the anxiety and met people, however,
I’ll probably never see them again. Not really sure how to take that
next step to becoming closer friends and I have always been a fairly
quiet person, so starting conversations in the first place is already a
difficult task. I feel guilty for feeling like this, there’s nothing
terribly wrong in my life, there are so many people worse off than me
and I don’t understand why I find it so hard to cope. I can’t relax even
when I’m at home, I don’t know how many times I’ve edited this post now,
the only time I have relief from the anxiety is when the depression gets
so bad that nothing matters anymore. The more I do to help myself and
realize nothing’s changed the more I feel hopeless. How do you measure
improvement? I’m told that I’m doing healthy things but I’m still in
that haze, confused and like a zombie living a pointless half-life.
sleep tablets, do you get "hooked"?
