Supporting my mum

[Girlkay]

Hi,

I am an only child and have been trying to support my mum who has really bad depression 

 she was sexually abused by her grandfather when she was young and her parents are alcoholics who hardly see her 

 she hates herself and constantly tells me this

 she takes anti depressants but has not been taking them for the last few months and has reached rock bottom yet again, she also takes pain relief tablets constantly.

everytime she is like this she tells me she wants to end her life and I dont ever know what to say or do to help her?

can anyone suggest anything?

she says speaking to a counsellor doesn't help because it brings back everything that happened to her as a child.

is it wrong for me to think she can't be helped and she should just do what she needs to do? 

[white knight]

Hi Girlkay, welcome to Beyond Blue forums

You are a really caring person to your mum, how extraordinary.

One of beyond Blue facts sheets might help you. But listening to her is the first thing then there's helping her around the home. It would be my priority to get her back on medication but you might have a fight on your hands. Most sufferers stop medication due to side effects but it is essential she get back on them.

Read up here on many threads so you get ideas. If she doesnt mind, attend with her her next doctors appointment.

Your mum needs care. To have you there doing just that is a huge boost for her. She might not show it though.

Take care of yourself as well. It's a fine balance and being young it is sad you are in this situation.  But worth the effort.

[dougall]

Hi I think you are extraordinary for looking after you mum.  My son has to put up with my depression and anxiety, I also drink.  He copes by going into his room and staying there.  Just knowing he is in the same house in comfort for me so I am sure your mother thinks the same.  Have you tried talking to a counselor and asking if they have any suggestions on how to approach your mums illness?