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What do i do

Wondering_why
Community Member
I have been dating a wonderful woman for the past three to four months and everything couldn't have been better until two weeks ago when she told me that she couldn't give me what i wanted in a relationship right now, but says its not over baby i love you and always will. We still have been talking every night on the phone and texting all the time. She always sends me songs via text through youtube with lyrics, all the songs are about love and how much someone loves the other. She also texts me saying she loves me and always will and im the best thing that has come into her life and i deserve better and sends me "goodnight baby sweetest dreams   for you, i'm always thinking about you, i love you" texts every night. i have not seen her for two weeks and she finally admitted that she is depressed and is in a dark place at the moment. I tell her i want to help but she refuses and texted me saying she has shut everyone out. She also drinks every night. I really love this woman, i have not met anyone that has brought the best out in me. could someone please give me some advice how to help her?  <>
4 Replies 4

white knight
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hi wondering, welcome to Beyond Blue forums

In any new relationship there is the honeymoon period and then it moves onto the part when loving words are met with actions. But you can overcome this situation.

You lady needs some confidence that you are understanding towards her depression, something most humans arent capable of unfortunately. She has hit a dark patch and she will be scared of losing you. Fear is why she has drifted during this time.

If you dont have much knowledge on depression then you can google it. But reading pages here will give you enough to see how it effects the sufferer. Even a text like "when you feel ok, I'm here for you"

It is really caring to post here asking the question.

Take care Tony WK

Thankyou Tony for your advice. I just want to really learn more on depression so i can help and work with her through this tough time she is going through and hope she come through it well. <>

dear WW, this is lovely but also sad, what you can also do is click under 'resources' at the top of this page and order all the 'printed material' from BB it's all free but it will explain what depression is all about.

This is just a short reply because I have to go now but will an eye on you. Geoff.

Hi Wondering why, have just read your post and I can only give you an answer from my point of view, I suffer from anxiety and depression on and off.  One of the things I found is when someone pushes you away they don't want you to get hurt and they don't want to feel the hurt of someone not coping with their illness.   When you have read all the material then you will understand a little more, good luck.