struggling with special needs children

[Matchy69]

Does anyone else have children with special needs.I am struggling with mine.My youngest cant use a toilet when their at the age they should be.I am getting tired of changing them,does that make me a bad parent?The constant hyperepisodes are taking their strain especially that i am going through other personal stuff in my life

[Hanna3]

Hi Mark, that is a good thought about maybe it was in a home with kids.  I'm not sure why the kittens bothered it, maybe the noise they were making?  

Yes I think it suits a home with a quiet person/people - no loud kids, other pets etc.  What I might do on Monday is see if one of the local vets will give me any advice about the biting?  I did Google it and they said it comes across as aggression but in fact biting is due to fear - so maybe the little boy shouting scared the cat badly.  When I went back in the afternoon it was rubbing itself against my legs and climbing into my lap, so much better.  I feel so sorry for the poor animals there - being shut in a cage all day without anything to amuse them, it must be awful no matter how hard the staff try to be kind to them.  

So I might see if any of the vets/vet nurses can advise me and I'll have another look Monday.  I did talk to a friend of mine in the USA (American lady) who used to take in a lot of rescue cats - she said they most often started out pretty much like this cat I looked at, and after a while in a calm home environment they turned out really good pets.  She has taken in lots of abandoned cats in her lifetime and said she still wouldn't hesitate to take another one in.  

So I will let you know how it goes!  Thanks for your help Mark and thank your daughter for me.  It's been raining hard here today,it's lovely to have rain we haven't had any for so long, and it's been quite coolish.  I hope you are getting this good rain up your way, it would be so good for your veggie garden!

[Matchy69]

My daughter says the cats are all vet checked and checked for temperament and only the ones that pass are put out forsale.My daughter works with them to get them suitable to be rehomed and she spends a lot of time in the pen with them so they are use to humans.

[Hanna3]

Hi Mark, that's good news.  The staff at the shelter here the other day didn't seem to have much time, they were mostly busy with the dogs.  I asked the young woman staff member there and she said the cats got a little bit of time in the room they are kept in when they clean the cage in the morning, but otherwise they are in the cage all the time.  It must be very boring for the poor animals.  I guess the dogs get taken for some sort of exercise but the cats stay put.  I am going up again tomorrow, they have a four year old female and the 6 year old boy I looked at last Friday - and I'll see how we go.  I think last week the young boy yelling really stressed the cat out.  Now he's met me again that afternoon and was improved, and I'll see how we go tomorrow.  If it doesn't work out I might contact a local rescue organization that adopts out cats.  Ican see the shelter here is a stressful environment for the animals no matter how much the staff care for them and do their best - I remember when I used to volunteer to walk the big dogs at the RSPCA in Canberra long ago, the poor dogs were so unhappy when I had to put them back in the cage.  

I'm glad we have places like the RSPCA shelters that make sure these poor animals are cared for and fed, but it's not a happy place for them to be even with the staff being so kind to them - they really do need a loving home where they can feel settled.  It's so good of your daughter to do this work - it can't be easy for the staff dealing with upset and stressed animals and also seeing how awful some humans can be to them!

I've been watching a couple of channels on Utube that give advice about how to deal with a stressed cat when you get it home!

I really would love another little dog, but at the moment I simply can't afford one - I can have a cat and get a doggie later sometime, I will put my name down for a rescue pup at the local vet - but it would be nice to give a cat a home that otherwise might not get one.

I hope your son is recovering from the trouble at school Mark.  And tell your daughter I really admire the work that people like her do with these poor animals!

[Hanna3]

Hi Mark, Sleepy,

Well I brought him home today!  He's gorgeous.  He's explored the house, climbed into the laundry sink and worked out how to open the pantry door!  He's been so good - curled up next to me on the cough and started to purr!  I think he's just glad to be out of the cage.

The shelter is so short staffed with just two girls on to handle the cats, dogs, phone calls and office work and I'm sure they are not well paid.  

So now I am trying to figure out a name for him.  I think he's going to be a really good cat!

[Matchy69]

Hi Hanna I am glad you bought him home I think he just needed to be out.Its good you took the older cat as many people would have left him there.He seems to have settled in at home with you very quick and him purring sitting on you shows he is happy.Cats can be such a joy to have and can be very entertaining.

[Hanna3]

Hi Mark,

He's chucked the towels off the shelf in the laundry and uses that shelf as his place to chill and relax now!  He can still give the very occasional bite if I do the wrong thing, but he's very affectionate and smoochy.  I don't think he got any wet food in the shelter and he is only eating the dry food I give him - I keep trying different flavours but so far no luck. I'm sure he is still stressed from the move though.  I must get a medallion engraved with his name (when I decide on one) and my phone number.  

I think he will be a good cat.  He's very handsome an loves being petted.  We are both getting used to each other!

[Matchy69]

My cat is fussy with food and will only eat seafood one in the satchels.Thats nice he has found a shelf to lay on.So funny kicking the towels off.My cat liked being on a chair under the dinning table.

[Hanna3]

I've had to take everything off any shelves he can possibly hop onto Mark!  He's climbed into my wardrobe, into the kitchen cupboards, behind the books on the bookshelf!  There's no stopping him!  He's scared of the cat tree I put up so that might take some time  He still disappears regularly and I don't now if he's under the bed or the sofa - he comes out again eventually.  I guess it's all still a bit strange.

It's going to be schorching hot today, he feels the heat with a thick coat.  I will have to leave the ceiling fan on as I do have to go out for a while.  I will be glad when February is over and we start to head into some autumn weather at last.

[Hanna3]

He's eaten some tiny bits of cooked chicken and that's all - I've tried so many tinned foods and he won't touch any of them!  Cats sure are picky eaters - dogs seem to eat almost anything!

[Matchy69]

Cats are very picky eaters.My cat would eat anything when it was a starving stray and when I started feeding her regularly she became very picky.She has such a good life now.Your cat will get use to you and everything and will be a lovely cat for you.

It was hot here today and I went for a motorbike ride this morning.I just had a bit of storm here this afternoon with some rain hopefully cools things down.I have to go shopping tomorrow for a birthday present for my daughter as she is 20 on Monday.