Hi,
This is my first post here, and I just wanted to seek some advice from people who have some experience (personally or otherwise) of depression.
My husband and are in our early 30s and have been happily married for almost 10 years. We've always been a very loving and caring couple. About six months ago I noticed a change in my husband, he seemed tired, withdrawn and not able to enjoy things. But he had been a very stressful job for the past two years and I had just managed to convince him to leave that job, and I thought he was just dealing with work stress and that it would soon be over. But things got worse and when I pushed him to talk about it, he said he'd been unhappy for sometime with his life and even our relationship. Since then I've talked to him about his feelings, how I am always there for him, but he has continued to be withdrawn and very different. He doesn't want to talk to friends or family, doesn't enjoy most things, is down on himself, says I deserve better than someone like him, has lost interest in food and our pets, is now very absent minded and forgetful, is always tired, sleeping more. He says his feelings for me have changed and that he doesn't see that improving, and basically that I should go and start a new life. It's all come so suddenly and he hasn't really given me a reason. He reluctantly agreed to couples counselling which I got with a clinical psychologist. We went to 2 sessions, and he said he was just unhappy in our marriage and that he doesn't love me anymore. He didn't raise any of the other behavioural changes, and I only mentioned one or two things as I didn't want to seem like I was criticising him. He keeps saying he needs to be on his own and sort out his life on his own. I don't know what to do. It's been 4 months now. Last week I finally moved out to give him space and he's pretty sure he doesn't want me to come back. But I'm really worried about him. It's really hard when he says there's nothing wrong and that he just doesn't love me anymore, I feel he's just saying this to move me on so he can be alone. He was the most loving husband so it just doesn't make sense.
Does this sound like it could be depression? I'd hoped the sessions with the psychologist would've delved in to this but he didn't show his feelings there. I don't know whether I should just respect his decision to be left alone or whether I should push him to seek help. He doesn't have any close friends (only one mutual friend who he has pulled away from) and I'm really the only person he shared his inner feelings with for a long time. I've spoken to his dad and asked him to talk to him, but they are not that close, and I fear my husband will just push him away too. Is depression something the sufferer needs to acknowledge on their own? Or can I do more to help?
