Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

This space discusses suicide and self-harm. Consider limiting the time you spend here. To use the section safely, read the pinned discussion.

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Pinned discussions

Sophie_M Do you have a safety plan?
  • replies: 97

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts wi... View more

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

Sophie_M PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section
  • replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to h... View more

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. ​This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

All discussions

Bluesky1234 Ending it after an argument
  • replies: 4

I always have thoughts of suicide after I argue with my husband. We are both very sensitive and so arguments happen often. They escalate quickly and every time I just feel like killing myself almost like a form of revenge. To show him how lost he wou... View more

I always have thoughts of suicide after I argue with my husband. We are both very sensitive and so arguments happen often. They escalate quickly and every time I just feel like killing myself almost like a form of revenge. To show him how lost he would be without me, what kind of life he would have without me, how he would suffer without me. The feeling is so strong with every argument that I feel like one day I will go ahead with it. What always stops me is the kids. I can't do it to them and leave them motherless. I tried therapy, meditation, creatrix, everything...but nothing has really been a long lasting help. I hate this cycle. Just wondering if others feel the same way. Thanks for listening

frankie2024 A six week cycle?
  • replies: 4

Hi I’ve been severely depressed lately. Tried to analyse myself out of it. My therapist spoke about a six week cycle for depressive episodes and whilst it provides some hope it means I still have half of the last four weeks to try and live through. W... View more

Hi I’ve been severely depressed lately. Tried to analyse myself out of it. My therapist spoke about a six week cycle for depressive episodes and whilst it provides some hope it means I still have half of the last four weeks to try and live through. Wondering if anyone has some thoughts about this theory and ways to cope? It’s been ugly lately. Thank you

Kitty88 What do I do?
  • replies: 1

I can't handle the stress anymore my health has gone to shit again! On-top of that there is financial issues, mental health issues, etc...I don't know if I can handle it anymore. Really contemplating turning myself in, maybe another life can do it be... View more

I can't handle the stress anymore my health has gone to shit again! On-top of that there is financial issues, mental health issues, etc...I don't know if I can handle it anymore. Really contemplating turning myself in, maybe another life can do it better then me...

bird without a flock The housing crisis in perth makes me feel suicidal
  • replies: 1

I feel extermely guilty for feeling like this because i've got a good job, i get payed well but the recent spike in housing prices just as i've finally saved up enough to buy a house is turning into the straw that broke the camels back. I've been dep... View more

I feel extermely guilty for feeling like this because i've got a good job, i get payed well but the recent spike in housing prices just as i've finally saved up enough to buy a house is turning into the straw that broke the camels back. I've been depressed an anxious for a long time. there's lots of reasons i got depressed, it'd take too long to explain it all but as a general rule i've cry'd almost everyday for the last 10ish years, i've planned my suicide at least 1000 times by now, i don't have energy for hobbies or loved ones. i'm very tired. As a rule, just as life starts getting good for me, everything always falls apart. I have a partner, they make me "happy," but something still feels very wrong with my existance. I'm not really okay, i'm not really happy. The main thing that really kept me alive this long was telling myself if i work hard and save up things will be okay one day. i'll be able to afford a nice home and go on nice holidays etc. the struggle will be worth it. i finally save up enough to go on a holiday, covid hits and we can't travel. i save up enough to buy a house, prices go through the roof and i can't afford anything any more. Everyone says prices will go down so i save up and wait. but they don't come down, the supply is dwindling, the only thing left is small units hours from work and i'm just tired of it all. Whats the point of working hard if theres never a happy ending to it. whats the point of spending 12 hours of my day paying taxes to then spend the rest of it crying and stressing about the future. Everyone else seems to have bought a house at the right time, gone on holiday's at the right time, found a fun hobby but the right time never seems to come for me. it's like my existance is cursed. I was born decades too late. i'm nearly half way through my natural life and it all feels like a waste, it's just constant suffering. I was finally starting to see an upside then the housing and cost of living crisis hits and i'm just done. Am i just entitled and needs to get over themself? does anyone else feel this way too?

goldfish_bowl Suicide ideation
  • replies: 1

I would like to think I would never commit suicide really, I’ve got two children that are my sole responsibility but when I get really distressed like I was last night, I fantasise myself doing it and slowly drifting away and the relief and end to th... View more

I would like to think I would never commit suicide really, I’ve got two children that are my sole responsibility but when I get really distressed like I was last night, I fantasise myself doing it and slowly drifting away and the relief and end to the pain, even how I would do it with what is in my immediate surroundings. So I guess that’s suicide ideation. The only reason I hold back is my two children that are my sole responsibility. I feel so helpless , I can’t make anything better and I also can’t escape. Recently I just feel there’s no one I can talk to anymore. I’ve been in a bad state of depression most of the last year and I’m that time I’ve drifted away from people and been socially avoidant. I also don’t get any time away from my kids and they hate spending time away from me and usually guilt trip me when I try and do anything without them. I know I need a change of meds and some more therapy but just so hard to sort out . Just feel I need to talk about it with someone before I completely lose the plot .

jumpyjellyfish- hopeless. the battle is neverending.
  • replies: 35

Hi all, I haven't been here in a while. I'm getting no where. And honestly, I'm at the end of my tether. I've done all the thing people say to do - I've reached out, I try to do self care, seek therapy, use healthy coping strategies... but nothing se... View more

Hi all, I haven't been here in a while. I'm getting no where. And honestly, I'm at the end of my tether. I've done all the thing people say to do - I've reached out, I try to do self care, seek therapy, use healthy coping strategies... but nothing seems to work. I've been pushed between countless mental health professionals and GP's because they say they can't help me. I'm SO exhausted. It feels like I can't escape this feeling of hopelessness. It's crushing me, its like this heavy weight on my shoulders that prevents me from being happy. Between juggling an eating disorder, depression, anxiety, OCD, self harm and suicidal thoughts for so long, it just doesn't work. I want to make the pain stop. I need it to stop. I need it to all go away. Not long ago, I was close to attempting to take my own life, and the thing that stopped me was literally that I numbed out and being unable to physically move my body. I just sat there for an hour. In hindsight, I'm glad that happened so that I didn't do anything I would regret, but there's a part of me that still wishes I was gone, that the countless near misses had been plans followed thru. It's so confusing though. I don't know if i want to die. I am safe from these thoughts tonight, I just need a space to express them. Sending much love to everyone out there struggling, you are not alone<3

JayPeralta01 Feeling Broken, alone and lost the will
  • replies: 2

I am currently really struggling, I feel I need to write this down cause I’ve never been great at expressing myself. I am feeling broken, betrayed. There’s just so much pain and it seems there is no light at the end of the tunnel. Haven’t been able t... View more

I am currently really struggling, I feel I need to write this down cause I’ve never been great at expressing myself. I am feeling broken, betrayed. There’s just so much pain and it seems there is no light at the end of the tunnel. Haven’t been able to sleep or eat, I feel heavy and the burden seems too much to bear right now . I’m trying to stay positive but these thoughts just get stronger every hour of every day

Serenity22 I’m new, and I’m not ok.
  • replies: 12

I’d rather speak on here than to a friend or family member. My suicidal thoughts began a year ago, linked to several surgeries involving malpractice and bad luck, surrounded with betrayal from a past partner and being kicked out of the house and back... View more

I’d rather speak on here than to a friend or family member. My suicidal thoughts began a year ago, linked to several surgeries involving malpractice and bad luck, surrounded with betrayal from a past partner and being kicked out of the house and back to my home state, with nowhere to live and no job, with health issues. My physical health won’t be the same. Not a moment in my day exists without physical pain. I’m nobody’s priority. Sometimes ppl say… oh, well you look good…you’re smart, and still have your looks at 41… and somehow ppl think that has any effect on my physical pain. I think some ppl look at slim, attractive women and think they have no problems. My pain is physical and it can’t be seen. I can’t wear shoes, or go barefoot so I lay or sit most of the time. I had a procedure a few days ago and the anaesthetic is no doubt causing depression which I don’t normally feel. I feel sad, or pain, or ptsd traits like nightmares but not depression. Not like this. The last person who betrayed me contacted me yesterday and the timing is leaving me in a spiral, where I have gone through the motions of how I will end things. I tell myself… if a pink rose appears on the tv in the next 2 scenes, I won’t do it. I wish I could find a reason to stay.. hope…hope for my health that something can be done. But ive lost my ability to exercise, take care of myself, work, and lost the chance of a family and possibly a relationship…ever. And that’s a life I can’t see me living. I need a miracle.

SummertimeSadness Tough 2023
  • replies: 3

2023 was a very dark year for me, mentally & emotionally. Suicidal thought have been occurring more frequently over the past 4 months & I literally prepared to do it, but, the ONLY thing that has stopped me is what it will do to my parents. I recentl... View more

2023 was a very dark year for me, mentally & emotionally. Suicidal thought have been occurring more frequently over the past 4 months & I literally prepared to do it, but, the ONLY thing that has stopped me is what it will do to my parents. I recently found out dad has a heart condition. I know it would probably kill him if I was to follow through, which would absolutely destroy my mum. I don't want to do that to them, but there's also the thought in my mind that I cannot continue to live this way. These thoughts make me start to resent my parents, who are the most loving, caring & beautiful parents anyone could hope for. I have so much pain, anger, guilt, despair & resentment, on top of the constant anxiety, depression, stress & nothingness that it am so drained of wanting to be here anymore. I have seen a therapist, but in the last few months I have 'put on an act' to make it seem like I'm coping a little better, just small improvements each time so it doesn't feel like I'm faking it. But honestly, I am so done with everything.

Clea Struggling
  • replies: 2

I'm really struggling. I am going to a psychiatric clinic on Thursday but I have been so many times and get out and then just go back to struggling. My kids were taken off me in 2022 and I just can't cope without them. So I'm trying to get better and... View more

I'm really struggling. I am going to a psychiatric clinic on Thursday but I have been so many times and get out and then just go back to struggling. My kids were taken off me in 2022 and I just can't cope without them. So I'm trying to get better and get help whilst struggling. My mental health was used to take them off me but then I'm suffering more because I don't have them. They were my world and now I feel so alone. I am starting to wonder if I should give them up and move on if I can. Cos it hurts so much not having them and then being kept from me.