Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

This space discusses suicide and self-harm. Consider limiting the time you spend here. To use the section safely, read the pinned discussion.

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Sophie_M Do you have a safety plan?
  • replies: 92

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts wi... View more

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

Sophie_M PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section
  • replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to h... View more

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. ​This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

All discussions

Black_Bubblegum The only way to win this game is not play at all
  • replies: 7

I honestly feel like that at the moment. I started to feel like things were getting better, started trying to make the small victories important, trying to make the most of every day. I made career change, started making new friends and started tryin... View more

I honestly feel like that at the moment. I started to feel like things were getting better, started trying to make the small victories important, trying to make the most of every day. I made career change, started making new friends and started trying to be a better version of myself one day at a time. But I just feel like it's for nothing. Between the cost of living stuff just grinding me down, the lack of any hope for the future and now all the stuff with gas and interest rates and all this financial crap, I feel like there's no point to living. I had a call centre scam call me this afternoon and it sent me into such a rage that I just hate this world. I feel like life is a game and I no longer want to play anymore. The only value I have in my life is caring for my parents. Otherwise my life is nothing more than making rich people richer and I was a fool for thinking I could make it better. I won't do anything, I wouldn't do that to my folks, but any progress I'd made over the last year seems for nothing and I just need to vent it out and I don't want to bring down any friends or family. Thanks for listening for what it's worth.

nib Sad.
  • replies: 1

Im struggling, I am not appreciated at home by my parents. I am an only child, so no siblings. I am currently living at home, but home isn't home to me anymore, and it's been that way for years. I have disorganised schizophrenia and heavily medicated... View more

Im struggling, I am not appreciated at home by my parents. I am an only child, so no siblings. I am currently living at home, but home isn't home to me anymore, and it's been that way for years. I have disorganised schizophrenia and heavily medicated for it to the point I feel constantly sedated. I'm trying to study at the moment, and I've been doing really well, and I want to keep things that way. I just wish I could move out of home, but I have nowhere to go. I'm always tired and want to do nothing but sleep, yet at the same time I want to get a job and travel. I've worked before, but quit my job due to reasons I don't wish to talk about through a public forum. I'm 24 and have been talking to Kids Helpline for the past 5 years, roughly.

CaramelCrisp How to talk about thoughts of self-harm and maybe death
  • replies: 31

Hey, first I am safe right now. I am not thinking of things right now, and whenever I have thought about it I haven't gotten close to doing things, I'm able to take a step back and stuff. I could be in a better spot but that's the idea. So, I have a ... View more

Hey, first I am safe right now. I am not thinking of things right now, and whenever I have thought about it I haven't gotten close to doing things, I'm able to take a step back and stuff. I could be in a better spot but that's the idea. So, I have a GP appointment coming up and I know what things I need to say. Namely that I am thinking the things I am, and it's affecting my ability to look after myself, paticularly taking far too much effort to eat food. But the conversation scares me, I had to talk myself out of cancelling yesterday. Doesn't help that I'm so low energy and my GP isn't exactly local. She's a great GP though, I couldn't have imagined telling any of my prior GPs I was feeling this way, and I have seen more than a few gps in these 20ish years. So I shouldn't go to a new one just to not have to deal with a long commute. But yes, I have no idea how to talk to such a supportive GP about this. How do I say things, how am I framing them? Most google results are how to talk to someone you think is suicidal, not what to do as the suicidal person so I guess I was just hoping for some perspective. Ultimately, if I don't know what I'm doing I can go to my GP and say "hey I don't know how to say this but I'm struggling to eat or see a future". I'm framing this as a question but ig im just hoping someone's able to share their perspective and that might help with nerves. Also I tried to talk to a friend about this and, well I did everything I could without saying it to check they could have that conversation. But once they knew what it was about they weren't able to be there for me. And, I can accept that I'm just worried about them. I can imagine they don't feel great about having to say "sorry I can't do this" and.. yeah. If anyone has any thoughts on that too. If I can do anything for them.

Freddy2110 Over life again
  • replies: 2

I’m tired of depression I’m tired of my chronic fatigue. I’m tired of being disrespected and made to feel worthless and used by my mind game playing ex. I reached out to her for help last week after letdown after letdown from life these last 12 month... View more

I’m tired of depression I’m tired of my chronic fatigue. I’m tired of being disrespected and made to feel worthless and used by my mind game playing ex. I reached out to her for help last week after letdown after letdown from life these last 12 months and didn’t want to live anymore. She has been the only one I’ve ever opened up to about my depression and felt I could count on her. After I opened up to her she basically ignored my texts and calls then blocked me completely after I asked her for help. I was dealing with self injury because my life is so screwed up. Why do I still love this girl when she put me through this last year as well with her manipulation and narcissistic cruelty.

rainynight11 Do you see people differently after finding out about there suicide attempt?
  • replies: 11

When someone you know has had a suicide attempt, does it forever change how you see them? How does it affect you short term and long term as a friend or a family member of the person who attempted it and survived? I’m glad I’ve never been on the rece... View more

When someone you know has had a suicide attempt, does it forever change how you see them? How does it affect you short term and long term as a friend or a family member of the person who attempted it and survived? I’m glad I’ve never been on the receiving end of it but it does worry me the affects I may have caused on the people who love me due to my past attempt. As a survivor, I do feel embarrassed and guilty for it.

stephrose im struggling
  • replies: 3

idk im just getting really tired. ive had depression for two years, anxiety since i was 8 and it has been getting worse in the last three years. idk why i feel so down but i just cant get out of this depressive episode. idk what to do.

idk im just getting really tired. ive had depression for two years, anxiety since i was 8 and it has been getting worse in the last three years. idk why i feel so down but i just cant get out of this depressive episode. idk what to do.

Josh_T Im so tired and I dont have the strength to fight this anymore
  • replies: 4

Firstly I want to apologize if this is not formatted correctly (I never was good writing/typing tings). A little bit of back info, Im 37M, have a wife and 3 kids, my first memory of "suicidal" thoughts were when i was around 8, i come from a broken f... View more

Firstly I want to apologize if this is not formatted correctly (I never was good writing/typing tings). A little bit of back info, Im 37M, have a wife and 3 kids, my first memory of "suicidal" thoughts were when i was around 8, i come from a broken family, im on medication due to my depression, i have a phycologist that i see (not recently because we cant afford it). I really dont know what to say or why im even doing this, I just feel like i have let everyone down, i am ashamed of the type of man i have become and i am really tired of fighting. This disease has taken so much away from me, i struggle to maintain a "healthy" working life (I have to take quite a lot of sick days, sometimes weeks on end), the burden i put on my wife and others around me eats away at me. Without fail every 1 to 2 months my depression comes back and every time i does it comes back stronger and more intense. I have attempted suicide twice before. I feel like every time i overcome my depression it chips away at me bit by bit till the point that i will do something that I and my family will regret. I just cant cope anymore, i am so very tired. Im sorry.

ktac1689 Will this ever end?
  • replies: 9

I have been battling depression and suicidal ideation for over two years now. I have been in therapy which has helped and tried medication which didn’t help much at all. I spent the first of those two years in absolute misery and wanting to end my li... View more

I have been battling depression and suicidal ideation for over two years now. I have been in therapy which has helped and tried medication which didn’t help much at all. I spent the first of those two years in absolute misery and wanting to end my life constantly, and I attempted on several occasions. I had a breakdown, essentially lost my job and spent several months in a fog; sleeping, eating and YouTubing and felt so hopeless. The last Year has seen progress but still up and down. I have seen some hope for the future but periods also where I thought that suicide was what I should do. I feel I have made progress in identifying and addressing the underlying causes of the pain I still feel. I feel like such a fraud. I go about my life and I look like all is ok, good even. I smile, laugh, joke. But I don’t want to be here. I keep thinking of ways to not be here even planning sometimes. It is so hard. I make plans for living too so that I will be forced to stay but it is not quite enough. I hate living this way. It is so isolating and makes me feel like I am so alone. It makes me careful what I say as I don’t want to be known as having a mental illness. The stigma on having a mental illness in our society facilitates that.

Sad80 Very lost
  • replies: 2

Hi, pls don’t judge me but I was abuse as a child physically, mentally and emotionally by my mother. I’m from a single parent. I drank a lot but then I married a great guy. We had 2 kids. With the 2nd child I nearly died giving birth and then my mum ... View more

Hi, pls don’t judge me but I was abuse as a child physically, mentally and emotionally by my mother. I’m from a single parent. I drank a lot but then I married a great guy. We had 2 kids. With the 2nd child I nearly died giving birth and then my mum said nasty things that made break down and not only did I suffered from a postnatal depression all the trauma I had as a child came back. I wanted to divorce my husband and thought cheating was the only way. I did a couple of times and finally admit it to him hoping that he will divorce me but I love him too much. We were ok for a couple of years but I had a lot of dark thoughts and I drank too much. Then I attempted suicide 2 years but survived. But currently things are not going well for me. I couldn’t get a job coz of the jab. I can’t travel and my relationship is not that great. Last week I drank too much and blacked out and cheated on my husband again. And now I feel really shitty. I don’t dare to tell my husband as he is a good person and at the sane time I don’t want to worry my kids but right now I feel all I do in this world is cause pain to ppl that I love. In religion I was told I will go to hell. So if I kill myself I’ll go to hell too. I feel like there is no turning back for me. I feel like I’m a useless garbage. And a useless to the society and my family. Pls tell me what should i do?

Gav71 Embarrassed
  • replies: 5

I’m 50yro still act like I’m only 20 I’ve had a hard life been belittled at school and at a lot of jobs even abused by a bossAlcohol has Been my go too since I was 13 started smoking at 9.I know alcohol is a deppresent yet it’s my drug of choice but ... View more

I’m 50yro still act like I’m only 20 I’ve had a hard life been belittled at school and at a lot of jobs even abused by a bossAlcohol has Been my go too since I was 13 started smoking at 9.I know alcohol is a deppresent yet it’s my drug of choice but as I sit here night after night fighting suicide thoughts alone wow I drink more and I don’t stop.Im a functual alcoholic as I’m writing this it’s 2am and I start work at 8am yet I don’t sleep real good as I mentioned earlier my young life haunts me night after night self worth zero I even feel like a low life in front of my kids Every night now I force myself not to go and do the end but it’s getting harder