I've not read the book I will have to look around for it though because it sounds interesting. I'm trying to transition from being a person who lied almost every day of my life to protect other people's feelings, or to please them, into someone who can speak my truth. It's very slow going as the concept is simple to understand while the practical application can be tricky. Like you say honesty puts a lot of people off and you might lose friends over it, which can be upsetting.
I guess what I'm trying to do is assess each situation as it comes. I have a few close friends I can be honest with and know I'll be accepted, so that helps. But there are some circumstances where it's just not going to be helpful to speak up. Like for eg. if you have a friend whose child is a bit of a brat, you can hardly say that. Times like that it might be that discretion is required ie. say nothing if you have nothing nice to say!
Also I am careful where I give opinions that I do it if the person asks. If they ask for my advice, all bets are off. I'll say exactly what I think. Ditto if the person has said something offensive, these days I speak up when I would have just simmered quietly before. An example there would be my MIL who says nasty things about other people in front of my children (she is racist, fatphobic and many other things). I call her on this now, challenge her beliefs. It seems to annoy her which is a nice bonus 🙂
But I suppose I assess when it is important to speak and when it's just better to keep quiet. I guess that's not really radical honesty at all, come to think of it lol. But I'm a work in progress.
I do know for a fact I feel better when I'm truthful, and agree that having to pretend to be something you're not creates untold stress on a person.
GW
