Staying/Getting/Doing Well – Moving goalposts or fixed target?

[Paw Prints]

Hi, this is my first post, though I have been reading the forums for some weeks. I’m probably expressing myself badly when I say that I have found reading about other people’s journeys reassuring. Finding a community of people who “get it” even when they have a wide variety of experiences and lives lived is not something I thought I would ever find.

Though people talk about getting well & there is a section Staying Well, I’m curious as to what this actually means to other people and how they manage their expectations. I noticed some people refer to being well as ‘being like themselves before they got ill’, whilst others don’t express an exact aim.

My idea of being well has changed over the years. I was first diagnosed as an 8 year old child back in the late sixties. The doctors told Mum that the voices in my head & the sudden crying bouts were because I suffered from ‘nerves’ & I was given meds to calm me. Of course such things were not discussed back then & I was told not to talk about it to anyone, not my school friends nor siblings, just Mum. For decades after my idea of being well simply meant being able to hide my illness from others.

A number of events in my life caused my illness to worsen, until some years ago I became so ill I needed to be hospitalised for my own safety. This lead to my current diagnosis of Major Depression, Anxiety & PTSD. I’m no longer in that dark place, but each day is still a battle (though I can now believe in a future). For now only my siblings & one friend know about my illness, though some things they still don’t know.
So, what does ‘being well’ mean to me, it is ever moving goalposts. If you had asked me 5 years ago would I be as well as I am now I would have thought it impossible as I couldn’t envision a future. If you had asked me last week (during one of my down periods) I would have said my progress was all an illusion & I was fooling myself that things can get better.
For now my idea of being well is being able to believe that things can change for the better, that I will one day be able to manage the everyday things like housework, caring for myself & caring for my dog & maybe, just maybe I will even be able to enjoy myself.

Paw Prints
**I took the tip to give myself time to write my post by writing on a word doc & then paste it.

[Paw Prints]

Hello Katy, Grandy, Deebi, Hanna,

The fish & chips were sooo yum.. they were so much better than the ones I used to get in the city... the potato cakes actually had a thick slice of potato... I felt so much brighter as the evening went on... I think the doctors are right when they say eating junk triggers our brain to release endorphins... which is why we crave it... I wish healthy food did the same... I must confess I didn't share much with Woofa.

I managed to do my dishes yesterday... lots of cups... today I went to the store & got milk... so two days with two useful things done...

Katy my mobile phone is an old flip phone... so pre app... I have been thinking about getting a new phone but it is still on my "to do" list... like so much.

Deebi almost all Woofa's are big sooky gentle giants... most don't need a big barrier to keep them confined so don't worry about the one near you getting over the fence... I can keep Woofa in a room by putting a small piece of ply across the door... he could jump over but isn't brave enough to go near the scary ply wood...

Hugs for you all

Paws

[Hanna3]

Hi. Paws

I'm so pleased you treated yourself to fish n chips as a treat! Good for you. 😊

How good that you managed a couple of chores as well! I'll bet that made you feel better!

I think you would enjoy a new smart phone if you had someone to help you with it if you got stuck at all. They're terrific.

We have torrential rain here and due to go from hot and steamy today to 12 degrees on the weekend!!!

Sam got soaked on his walk a little while ago!

I'm really pleased you feel brighter! Big hug! 😊🐕🌳🌻💞

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Hi Paws

Ive never eaten so much junk in my life as I have to get through prac and my thesis! Maybe I NEED it? Glad you had a yummy meal and are feeling better. AND chalking up some achievements 🙂

I think of you in the mornings when I see my lovely big red kangaroo paw. How are your plants going? Mine are all neglected and I can’t wait to find time for them.

Sending hugs and blowing Woofa a big smooch x

[Paw Prints]

Hello Katy, Deebi, Grandy & Hanna,

Yesterdays practical thing done was... I repotted a plant that had been blown off the table on the back verandah when the storms came through a week ago... luckily it had held onto some soil around its roots & being a pigface it is as tough as old boots... so fingers crossed it will survive...

Katy I'm very surprised to be able to say that the plants I potted have so far all survived... I still have some tubestock living on my kitchen windowsill that need to be potted out... but I need to buy more pots... biggest surprise is I have a kangaroo paw growing in my garden... it is hidden surrounded by bushes... I remember seeing it when I moved in here & wandered through looking at what was where... but because it wasn't in flower then I didn't know what it was at the time... it is in flower now & they are just poking over one of the bushes... they are a yellowy green colour...

Back to winter today... cold & wet... Woofa ran to me when I picked up his coat... I will need to take him to get another arthritis needle as he is a bit stiff getting up & down...

Hugs

Paws

[Hanna3]

Hi paws

I was halfway through my message when the phone rang and I lost it all so this is just brief..

So good you potted the plant, just one small thing a day is great and makes me feel better!

We have 5 degrees here windy and raining and all the people visiting from the city are unprepared and freezing! The indoor cafes and restaurants will be doing well.

Have had a busy couple of days and then this morning I had no wifib so probably the weather.

[Ggrand]

Hello Dear Paws,

Well done repotting the pig face..I really do love the vibrant colours of them..,,I have heard before how pig faces are tough as old boots..but every time I put a cutting into my garden they just shrivel up to dust....Do you have many different colours of them?...Do you put your potted plants on your veranda or do you put them around your yard?..

You are doing a good job Paws of doing something each day....I don’t....and really do need to take a lesson from you to do so....I still have last nights dishes and all of my tea spoons need washing...right now the tea spoon section has none in them...I rinse my tea cup when I want another cup of tea, but just grab a clean tea spoon...😂😂 I didn’t realise how many of them I have until I need to wash them..

I don’t have a green thumb at all....Most of my plants are geraniums, Irises, Lillie’s and pretty weeds😂😂..

I have a few of those larger foam boxes that I have some parsley, shallots, potatoes and strawberries growing in them...I find them easier to keep them weed free...

Your garden sounds really pretty...I had to google kangaroo paw, they are so pretty....and not much looking like a kangaroos paw....I find it quite funny the names that are given to flowers..

Cold here today, I’m rugged up under my doona tv on...while I’m playing Homescapes and reading here....

Enjoy your day Paws, and everyone else the best you can....

Love, care and hugs everyone...

Grandy..

[Hanna3]

I got cut off in mid post but part has come through. I think I'll give up today the weather is crazy and the signal is all over the place! 🙂

[Paw Prints]

Arrrghhh I've been trying for over 2 hours so far to convince Woofa to get out of the car...

patience... breathe in.... breathe out.... breathe in...........

[Paw Prints]

Finally he is out... after 2 hour 40 minutes... definitely going to the vet this week for his arthritis needle... I think his reluctance might mean his arthritis is bothering him with this cool spell...

Going to be a busy stressful week as I also need to take me to the doctor & chemist... plus I'm thinking of ringing the chap I usually get out to slash my paddock & mow to get it down sooner than the neighbour can do it... another reason for getting him out is he can show me how to use the charger... I hope he is still in business after all the covid shut downs.

Grandy all my pot plants are on my back verandah... some of them are in pots until I get my front verandah finished... then they will go in the ground out the front... it sounds to me you do have a green thumb... growing potatoes is beyond my skills... I even struggle to grow mint which is supposed to be idiot proof... not for me...

I do the rinse it thing with cups etc too... I think it might be because living alone it doesn't seem worthwhile filling the sink just to wash a couple of things, so we leave it until we run out of something & there are enough dishes to be worth it.

I hope everyone is staying safe with all the flooding happening everywhere...

Hugs

Paws

[Hanna3]

Hi paws I'm nearly out of battery and wifi signal but you can google dog won't get out of car - and there are lots of ideas. Glad you got wofa out! Has he been for a walk and doesn't want it to stop? Or yes maybe it's painful. What about a treat?

It's freezing and windy here we are hunkering down here!

Hugs 🐕