Mindfulness: What Is It? (Even if you dont know please post so we can help grow the forums accordingly)

[blondguy]

Hi Everybody

This is only the basic dictionary definition...

"Mindfulness is a state of active, open attention on the present. When you're mindful, you observe your thoughts and feelings from a distance without judging them good or bad. Instead of letting your life pass you by, mindfulness means living in the moment without judgement"

• Please be as blunt you wish....If you dont have an idea about mindfulness it would be great if you could let us know
• If mindfulness hasnt worked/or is too broad a concept for you it would great if you can let us know your thoughts too
• If mindfulness has helped you, please help others to help themselves by posting how you have embraced this mindset

It goes without saying that the forums are a judgement free zone and I really hope that everyone can jump in and have their say

Your input is highly valued no matter how you respond to this topic. There are no experts here...New Posters are Most Welcome!!

My Kindest Thoughts

Paul

[quirkywords]

Hello Grand and Elizabeth and everyone,

Thanks for your kind replies.

Elizabeth it is good that your psych tried different ways to teach mindfulness. In a course there is just one way and individual differences are not always catered for.

Grand, thanks for your ideas. I feel too that mindfulness can be found in different activities and while the course mentioned mindful eating, mostly the focus is on ten and 20 min meditations and 2 minutes ones and looking at breathing and body scans.

I think I have learnt to take form this course what will help me and get too worried about the parts that I do not find useful.

Quirky

[Moonstruck]

Did I read that right? Someone is trying to practise mindfulness and they are told to "try harder"?? Dunno whether to laugh or cry! "trying harder" would defeat the whole purpose and concept!

Relax and just "be" Quirky.....then see what happens!

[blondguy]

Hi Everyone.....New members are welcome to post too!

Hey Moon...Thankyou for your kind post. You mentioned " Mindfulness (the concept) includes being aware of the "now", fully being in the moment" You have a good grasp of mindfulness Moon. I still have difficulty with the 'label' as for me it reflects a busy mind....'Mindfulness' (in theory I understand it doesn't)

Hey Quirky..Thankyou heaps for your input and assistance. Nice1 too doing the course as well! You mentioned a valuable point "One thing I am trying is to slow down as I am someone who thinks fast, talks fast , and eats fast" I have been slowly reversing this mindset for about 30 years...seriously...and its very hard to do....yet every step is worth the effort. Going back to 2016 on the forums I frequently mentioned...'think slow....walk slow and talk slow'....You have made an excellent point Quirky

Hey ElizabethCP....Thankyou for your helpful and wise post (great to see you too!) You mentioned "My psych tried teaching me some mindfulness but he kept trying different methods to find what worked for me because we are all different" You are spot on Elizabeth.....I had the bulk of my therapy before 'mindfulness' was labelled as a coping mechanism. I hear you loud and clear though.....I was taught 'acceptance' therapy which reduces the symptoms of fear/anxiety/depression. My best for you and your husband Elizabeth

Hey Grandy....Really great to have your helpful post here. Your post makes perfect sense. You mentioned "mindfulness is a sort of way to slowing down our over anxious mind and then when we are in a state of mindfulness the brakes come on" You have summed this up so well Grandy and thankyou. I prefer 'grounding' yet I am accepting the meaning of 'mindfulness'

You are all amazing people x

my kindest always

Paul

[quirkywords]

Moon,

Thanks for your post.

The exact words were to practice more , try harder and don't give up so I may have taken it slightly out of context!!

Someone once told me to take one thing away from a book or course, so I have taken away to slow down a bit from the mindfulness course.

hat I found that by being honest with my feedback other people doing the course agreed with me about having trouble and finding mindfulness difficult.

We all relate to concepts differently and need to be allowed to experiences things differently.

Quirky

[smallwolf]

Hi quirky,

I also found it odd that you might have been told to try harder, especially if there are parts of it you are confused about.

And if you ask a question... Better to be a fool for a day than a fool for a lifetime if you don't ask.

I think there are different ways of practicing mindfulness... From something simple where you focus on your breath to something more complex that maybe more akin to a body scan. Some might say it's ok for your mind to wander. Others say nothing.

But I think that if it too difficult where you worry about the rules then probably not mindfulness.

tim

[quirkywords]

Tim

do you mean that if it is too difficult then mindfulness is not for me,

Or do you mean that it if it is too difficult it is not mindfulness?

Quirky

[Moonstruck]

Dear Quirky....in my case (and that is the only experience I can speak from) I've never done a course or anything similar.....what is "mindfulness" to me just "happened". It was when I was really relaxed, no hurry to go anywhere or do anything, no one talking to me.... and didn't require any effort whatsoever.

I think if it's "difficult" it's not happening . (I've described my experiences on here some time back...first time on a train journey, then noticing how lovely the little park/lunch precinct in our main street was, then sitting in my back yard and "noticing" the colours of the wind chimes tinkling above my head........it was like really "seeing" these everyday things for the first time, really Looking at them, not eyes just flicking over them, but really noticing every little detail.

while looking at the wind chimes (for example) I was thinking of nothing else My mind was seemingly empty, except for the subject of my focus......a very nice experience. Good luck....don't over-think it, and don't try so hard would be my advice, for what its worth.............love...xo

[Ggrand]

Hello Moon, and all,

At the start when I found this thread I wanted to do mindfulness so much, that I tried so hard to do it, I kept thinking about trying to be mindful while I was looking for things to be mindful with..my mind was to chatty because i was getting over anxious not being able to do mindfulness...

One day I was not mentally doing very good at all, I was laying on my lounge with my front door open when one of my sun catches sparkling in the sun caught my eye, then I just looked at it, seeing the beautiful sparkling colours coming from it, I was fixated on it nothing else mattered except those colours... then I’m not sure why, I heard the birds whistling, I ended up falling asleep that time..it just totally relaxed my mind and soul..I felt peace...

Mindfulness for me usually starts with me seeing something and then really looking at it...I like what Moon said.”If it’s difficult it’s not happening “..I think if it’s to difficult our minds are to chatty with us trying to hard to be mindful....Just thinking that if it’s to hard to do mindfulness maybe we should ground ourselves first then try again...not sure..just my thoughts..

Love and hugs..💜🤗.

Grandy...

[Moonstruck]

Yes that's it Grandy...as you described your experience seeing the sparkling colours and then noticing the bird whistling etc..sounded similar to mine. "seeing something and then really looking at it".......no need to go around searching and deciding what to choose etc. in fact, no effort at all. thanks for sharing..

I hope others can have the same peace -inducing moments of mindfulness as we seem to have experienced.. You take care of yourself now....xo

[smallwolf]

Quirky,

Little bit of the latter, that is...

if it is too difficult it is not mindfulness?

but if something does not make sense, it is better to bring it up immediately to get some understanding. The alternative is not asking, and never understanding. Another saying that is similar is

“There are no foolish questions and no man becomes a fool until he has stopped asking questions.”

- Charles Proteus Steinmetz

It is good that you are asking questions or commenting on it. To be told that you are doing it wrong is wrong in itself.

And just because it does not seem like it is working does not mean that it is not. It might take some days before it feels like it is working. But suppose that you tried it for sometime and it does not work. That is OK. Some things that work for you might not work for me.

I hope that makes sense,

Tim