Do You Like Yourself? Your Thoughts are Welcome!

[blondguy]

Hello Everybody and new posters especially:-)

I have had anxiety since 1983 and depression from 1997. There is always someone that says 'You have to Love Yourself' before recovery. When people are suffering from anxiety/depression this may be the last 'advice' they really need. This is only my experience when I am 'advised to love myself' to rebuild my life. I have heard the following from people that cant 'love themselves' which is fair enough as I am a person that cant either. Your thoughts will help me and others learn from your point of view. I can only be 'gentle' to myself to heal...not love.

• Why should I love myself if I dont in the first place?
• I am in a dark place, how can I love myself?
• I dont deserve to love myself
• I am depressed...How can I love myself?
• I have mega anxiety attacks..what is there to love about myself?
• I hate myself and what I stand for...why should I?
• I love my partner more...I will care about myself 'later'

When people have depression/anxiety/denial they dont need to be counseled with ' love yourself'. Thats a huge ask.

I dont need to climb Mt Everest by trying to love myself when I cant. It can be an unrealistic and even silly target to achieve having depression

I just prefer to be 'gentle' to myself. Same results and way less stress 🙂 Your thoughts/opinions are more than welcome

Thankyou so much

Paul

[ecomama]

Thanks Paul.

I hope you're managing okay.

EMxxxx

[Jstar49]

Thanks Paul,

You are always so encouraging and kind to everyone, thankyou for your support, and I hope you are well,

Cheers,

J*

[blondguy]

Hey Jstar

Thankyou!

You just made my day😀

Hope you are having a good weekend

Paul

[quirkywords]

Hello everyone.

I recently lost my phone and started feeling negative thoughts about me.
it may turn up but it has been but is has been over 3 days.

I try to like myself and say just because I lose things doesn’t make me a bad person just forgetful.
Do others feel bad when they lose things especially a phone.

[Guest_1584]

Hi quirk .

With Dyslexia you often just can't see things , not even phones or car keys , or count money or a loaf of bread on the bench ,words on a screen, where as most of the time you can. So you know something isn't lost it's probably right in front of you your just not seeing it. But nah it doesn't make me hate myself just frustrates the hell out of you. l've developed a kind of mental reset thing over the yrs , so that if l can just relax the frustration , kind of start over - then l can see again what ever it was l lost - or just couldn't see , and bingo , there it will be right in front of me after all. Doesn't always work often it'll be days before l see it again . lf my daughter or gf are around l'll just ask them can you see or find such and such plse, yeahhh, there it is right there, so that saves me too. Sometimes l've given up and say gone down the shop for more bread or something, come home put it on the bench to make lunch or whatever and there's the other loaf just sitting there right beside it , that ones very annoying haha.

Hope the phone turns up. rx

[smallwolf]

Hi Q. Hope you find your phone. It is easy (?) to get frustrated and angry with yourself when something like this happens. Someone I know has an ability to misplace their keys phone and... And then there are certain persons in my family as well! You are not the first person nor the last.

One thing I would say is... I should have done...

I try to say now ... I wish that ...

Which is not as negative. All of these little things can help us to like or dislike ourselves.

[Ggrand]

Hi Everyone.....

I hope everyone is being very gentle and kind to your beautiful selves....

I used to loose my keys..put them down anywhere when I was tired..then forgot where they were....

My support worker and I went and bought a little wooden shelf with a drawer in it and 4 hooks...We attached it to a little wall in my kitchen....I now place my keys on the hooks, my purse in the cupboard and my phone on the shelf...haven’t lost any of those items now for 3 years...

Please don’t be to hard on yourself Quirky for loosing your phone...I really do hope that you find it....

I do like the little improvements that are happening for myself.....We never stop learning......Learning about ourselves for ourselves is one way to be kind to ourselves..

Hope your day was a good day..

[quirkywords]

Random not sure I have dyslexia but there is another for messy disorganised people with bad hand writing start dysgraphia, someone said I may have that.

Random it is frustrating isnt it to lose things.

My skill is finding other peoples items but alas not my own.

Small wolf I have partner and friends saying you should have had it off silent , which is very annoying. as it is too late now and I just feel smahed.

Grandy, we have a rack for keys and it works most of the time. I dont lose it at phone just at op shop. In ten years this is first one I have lost for so long but you would think I am losing them every month.

Well done Grandy for little i mprovements thats why I like the thankful thread and achieving small things.

This time I didnt cry after losing phone . an improvement.

Thanks to randomx, small wolf , grandy ,Paul for this thread, and all those posting and reading that makes this my go to thread and I am learning everytime I read a post.

[Guest_1584]

Nah you don't have dyslexia don't worry l just went on a rant from my own frustration sometimes that's all. You just lost your phone it's understandably frustrating and it stops everything these days doesn't it. Dunno how they did it but they somehow invented something that makes us put our whole life on it so when we lose it , not good huh.

Hope it turns up anyway . rx

[ecomama]

Dear quirky, what a pain in the proverbial!

Cheeses I can't list the things I've lost... the "object permanence" thing that randomx described is just PART of me. Drives me nuts at times but there it is.

Big hugs quirky!

Anyone who criticises you for losing your phone is a numbskull.

You're so patient and kind to the ppl around you quirky.
They need to pull their heads in.

Hugs again.
Love EM

Oops YES I like myself!