Do you forgive?

[Guest_1055]

Feeling hesitant about writing this and little scared of what people will think about me, a fear of being rejected I think. Well here goes.

Just today I have been thinking about forgiveness, forgiving the people who hurt us, let us down, or bring us pain in any other way. And I think forgiving actually helps us.

So what I aim to do, as a strategy to get rid of bitterness from within me is to:

1. Grap an apple or a potato from the kitchen.

2. I am off to see what I have got, yeah I have an apple that is going soft.

3. Write on the apple or whatever you have chosen " I forgive you" and draw a smiley face, that is what I did, and it is looking right back at me now.

4. Think of that person that has hurt you, and say I forgive you....... for hurting me.

5. And then I will go to the ocean, because I live near there. Walk down to the waves, and use all my physical strength and throw the apple as far as a can. "Just let in go"

Note:  If anyone tries this strategy from beyond blue, and I come across an apple on the beach. I will toss it back in for you.

Not sure of the outcome of this strategy yet, but I will keep you posted if you would like.

Also if you are not near an ocean, maybe you could choose a paddock.

OK going to post this now, still scared of what people will think of me."Rejection"

[Eagle Ray]

Dear Shell,

What you say makes total sense. I haven’t grown up with a specific religion, but I feel what I’m trying to describe is the same thing. I guess I can describe it as a knowing or higher consciousness or the soul of the universe. You are right, it’s through that unconditional loving light that we forgive. It’s not us so much as the light passing through us. We are held by that light, and it is us being held by it that enables us to love unconditionally.

 I have found that when I come into contact with other people who are in touch with that light, their open heart opens my heart and I know I am safe.

 I think what happens is when we lose that connection we can fall back into our pain. Like I can forgive with that light flowing through me, but later something can trigger a memory of someone’s unkind behaviour. I can retract in my body just from the memory and then resentment arises again and then I can feel anger. All of that is an understandable survival response in our body, especially where past trauma was involved. It’s like our body trying to protect us from future attack in a way. That is only human.

When we feel loving kindness flow through us, it clears out the dark stuff, the stored trauma etc. But if there’s been a lot of trauma repeated from the beginning of life, it takes time to heal and the body can reflexively go into self-protection mode with associated fear responses. Sometimes if we’ve had violence towards us, especially in childhood, there’s rage stored there that never got expressed at the time because it was completely unsafe to express it. For me that is true. So I’ve gradually been learning ways of releasing it and letting the light come in. I guess that’s where I’m coming from when talking about acceptance and letting go.

Sorry, I just wrote a lot again! It’s just I’m living through this stuff right now so the topic is very relevant to me. I’m having to totally rest at the moment. My psychologist was saying that’s often what happens when we let go. We’ve been bracing in our body for a very long time and when it releases often we just want to sleep. I have been under a blanket on my couch most of the last 3 days, but it’s absolutely necessary for my body to heal. I just woke up from yet another sleep.

Thank you for sharing this topic. I feel like so many people are looking to heal and issues around forgiveness are often part of that. Warm hug from ER