Bright Ideas

[Sad_Mushroom]

Hi,

OK, I know at times my brain burps and doesn't work quite the way I'd like it to. BUT, at other times, quite out of the blue it 'burps' out an idea that seems so simple I can't believe it that I thought of it.

Example: When my kids were younger we always had a light on at night. Usually a hallway light. Although if they wanted a drink or to use the bathroom that meant other lights were being turned off and on all night (I had 5 kids so once one got up, generally they all did) BILLS were, of course, causing me much anxiety and I was always in a panic before the electricity bill came.

One day while working in the garden I had an idea. I pulled out the solar garden lights (a string of 100 small lights) and took them into the bathroom. I used blue tack to set the solar panel on the window sill but couldn't work out how to hook up the lights. Searching the shed for hooks I found my sons old round fishbowl. AHA! I cleaned the bowl and placed all the lights in the bowl then put the bowl on the bathroom cabinet.

Once it got dark it shone like a large light bulb. It lasted until early hours of the morning. The next day I purchased two glass bowls from a Vinnies shop for a few $$ each and got two more sets lights. I placed these on the top kitchen cupboards, one each side of the kitchen sink. Not only were there no more lights being turned on and off at night but we didn't need a hallway light on either. My rational mind knew I was only saving a few dollars on each electricity bill but I stopped worrying about the lights being on at night and stopped panicking about the electricity bill. It wasn't bright enough to read a book but was good enough to use the bathroom and make a cuppa in the kitchen.

One of my male friends who was suffering depression took on my idea and ran with it. His home is largely self-sufficient now and his bills are minimal. He has everything from free hot water to water saving ideas right through to the garden etc. Some of his ideas are based on products which cost a fortune but he's found how to replicate them for a small cost or no cost at all.

Does anyone else have some bright ideas that have helped that they'd like to share?

SM

[Ggrand]

Hello SM,

Your post just reminded me of something...Something bitter sweet, .. When I was a little girl, I was once in hospital, I was really scared...I fell over yeah (abuse) put me their.....my Pop and Nan visited me one day ( they did it without my parents knowing) and bought me a candle, I told them I was scared and I was crying......They lit the candle for me, saying it would take away any bad things that made me scared...I had never seen a candle before let alone a lit candle, I remember watching the flame dancing around and how mesmerised I was with it....

My Pop and Nan I never got to know or see very much of...They kept away from our family, too toxic for them....I only seen them a few times in my life , but I knew they were kind. Gosh just getting some relief from the depression tears, now they started again, but it's ok these tears are worth it..

I can't thank you enough SM for your bright idea, maybe I will get someone at Vinnies to buy me a candle on Tuesday then I will sit down when it's dark , light it, then watch the dancing flame...maybe a type of mindfulness..

kind thought,

GG

[Sad_Mushroom]

Thank You, GG,

You have made my day. Of all the things I needed to read today, that was it.

SM

[Ggrand]

Hi SM,

I need to apologise for going of topic, sorry..

GG

[Sad_Mushroom]

No GG,

Topic doesn't matter. You matter. If my 'bright idea' sparked an idea in you, that reminded you of something worth trying, then we are still on topic.

Even bitter sweet memories and tears are better than the dark ones.

I have my fingers crossed in hopes your candle brings some light for you and chases some of the dark away.

SM

[Sad_Mushroom]

Hi,

Been busy and not keeping up.

The Magpies have stopped swooping when people walk by but they are still swooping people on bikes. Both push bikes and motorbikes. Riders have all kinds of things stuck in their helmets trying to prevent the swooping but nothing seems to really work. I've seen riders with eyes stuck on the back of helmets, those plastic ties that stick out like porcupines even sunglasses sitting backwards but nothing seems to work.

Yesterday I noticed a man riding passed with a small leafy branch somehow attached to his helmet. It looked like a little plant growing out of his helmet. It worked! The magpies ignored him completely.

Not sure if they thought he was a moving tree but they paid no attention to him at all.

Good thinking man on bike!

SM

[Croix]

Dear SM~

I'm posting here because it is the only thread of yours I could find -sorry if it is the wrong one.

I think you are 'rosy' - anyone who could give that post today to Dottibluebell most certainly is. No, talking about oneself and difficult times is hard, and can tend to awaken the feelngs of the time, but I think that post of yours has so much good buried in it.

Croix

[Sad_Mushroom]

Hi Croix,

Thank you!

I kind of forgot about this thread. I remember when I'm at work etc and remind myself to post here but when I log in to BB there's always so much to read and reply to that I forget to post here.

For me, I lack empathy but when I see a post like Dotti's it stirs the feelings of horror, dread, fear and hopelessness that I felt in similar circumstances. I also know the most common answers (as seen on Dotti's thread) are the 'expected' way things should work but sadly in some circumstances, for whatever reason, the "authorities" decide to palm people off and make it someone else's problem, rather than help. The BIGGEST problem with that is, once one 'authority figure' has palmed it off, it makes the others think the problem is not a serious concern, so they all palm it off.

I guess when we say 15yo, we all assume a child but take a look at most 15yo boys these days. Geesh, most of them are shaving now. They are hardly the same as 15yo boys when I was a 15yo girl. LOL some 15yo girls these days look like me when I was 21yo!

For the parent, you are stuck with having to choose one child over another. That is a position that NO parent ever wants to be in. To the parent, we remember the child as 3yo and wonder where WE went wrong. What WE did wrong. People and 'authorities' are always happy to make sure we know that WE must have done something wrong.

The feelings of guilt are....can not explain it. There are not words to explain it.

Thank you for being here!

SM

[Sad_Mushroom]

OK, so Tony (white knight) raised an issue in another thread about SILENCE.

I began a rambling reply and realised I was going off topic with my own issues.

As a kid, my older estranged sisters used to abuse me. Both mentally and physically. As adults, we tried to get along but when I mentioned the abuse I was told "get over it" or "that was years ago" and they just do not care. As far as they are concerned it wasn't serious, didn't hurt and I should get over it.

WELL, it hurt me. One sister almost chopped my finger off with a shovel. The same sister bashed me continually, threatened me with knives, ripped half my hair out and continually humiliated me in front of others. Her and another sister used to tell me the reason mum left me was because I was ugly and a disappointment. Their abuse was so dominant and constant that I was 27yo before I stood up and said anything back. I had tried standing up before but then they would gang up and get the third sister involved and I always gave in.

I was 27yo before my "other side" which we call Piker stood up to them. Piker hurt one and went looking for the other who hid inside and cried like a baby.

In later years all they have said "by email" is. Get over it. They say I am an adult now and should get over it.

I told them all to go and have nothing to do with them. I am SILENT, not only to them but to others who show the same "traits" as them.

Bullys are a dime a dozen and it is rare that any of them want to take responsibility for the pain they have caused others. The bully feels nothing so assume the victim should feel nothing.

My SILENCE is because I will not allow anyone else to become a bully. Chances are the person I am silent to is not even a bully but I am not willing to take the chance.

I will make a point and if I am ignored then comes SILENCE. If the person does not care enough to listen I should not have to repeat my fears again.

My fears are my fears and I do not share them lightly. If I do share and am ignored SILENCE follows.

SM

[Croix]

Dear SM + Piker~

Standing up to them is a feat not everyone does, in fact I suspect few do, it is so much easier to avoid things, move away, complain to others, try to live with it. So standing up is hard. I would imagine it is also the only way to be free of them. Sadly not to be free of the effects.

There really is no way to get over it or move on or anything like that. Anyone who suggests you should is showing monumental insensitivity at the least. You might be able to accommodate the effects in your life, make adjustments and cope, but it is not really getting over it. Being an adult is making that accommodation - you are very much an adult.

I can exactly understand your resorting to silence, one chance should indeed be enough for a person to show their colors.

Please ramble all you want.

Croix