Bright Ideas

Sad_Mushroom · ‎03-12-2017

Hi,

OK, I know at times my brain burps and doesn't work quite the way I'd like it to. BUT, at other times, quite out of the blue it 'burps' out an idea that seems so simple I can't believe it that I thought of it.

Example: When my kids were younger we always had a light on at night. Usually a hallway light. Although if they wanted a drink or to use the bathroom that meant other lights were being turned off and on all night (I had 5 kids so once one got up, generally they all did) BILLS were, of course, causing me much anxiety and I was always in a panic before the electricity bill came.

One day while working in the garden I had an idea. I pulled out the solar garden lights (a string of 100 small lights) and took them into the bathroom. I used blue tack to set the solar panel on the window sill but couldn't work out how to hook up the lights. Searching the shed for hooks I found my sons old round fishbowl. AHA! I cleaned the bowl and placed all the lights in the bowl then put the bowl on the bathroom cabinet.

Once it got dark it shone like a large light bulb. It lasted until early hours of the morning. The next day I purchased two glass bowls from a Vinnies shop for a few $$ each and got two more sets lights. I placed these on the top kitchen cupboards, one each side of the kitchen sink. Not only were there no more lights being turned on and off at night but we didn't need a hallway light on either. My rational mind knew I was only saving a few dollars on each electricity bill but I stopped worrying about the lights being on at night and stopped panicking about the electricity bill. It wasn't bright enough to read a book but was good enough to use the bathroom and make a cuppa in the kitchen.

One of my male friends who was suffering depression took on my idea and ran with it. His home is largely self-sufficient now and his bills are minimal. He has everything from free hot water to water saving ideas right through to the garden etc. Some of his ideas are based on products which cost a fortune but he's found how to replicate them for a small cost or no cost at all.

Does anyone else have some bright ideas that have helped that they'd like to share?

SM

Sad_Mushroom · ‎11-01-2018

I see a lot of posts about partners and the replies saying said partners are wrong. Are we just patronising people? Confirming their illusions?

I do not think we should ever tell anyone their partner/carer/parent is wrong without all the facts and both sides. I know people might "feel" a certain way but to confirm they are right and everyone else is wrong, is just silly.

We can validate peoples feelings without saying other people are wrong. What do we even know about the facts? People with MH issues often feel things that are not real. Supporting them is one thing but telling them to leave family/friends for nil support is silly.

I know some people need to get away from abusive others but how much do we know is abuse and how much is just thoughts from a person suffering from MH issues?

Years ago when no anger management support group was in my area they sent me to an abused wives group. I got kicked out for smacking a woman. She complained that her husband pushed her (during an argument) after she hit and punched him. So, she hit and punched him and he pushed her to get her away from him. He was being charged and she got free counselling. She admitted to all of this. I was appalled. She attacked him and when he had enough he pushed her away. She fell and claimed assault and the law stuck with her. I smacked her and I did it as an abused wife who suffered broken bones because dinner was not ready when my husband got home,,,,at random hours after he finished drinking. (Not proud of it,,,,,hold on,,yes I am)

My husband would disappear for months at a time then turn up at 3am at a random day, no warning and kick the chit out of me for dinner not being on the table. As if this woman had anything to complain about. She was hitting her husband first.

I don't know if it is me talking now or my other self (Piker) but there should be a line. IT is me...Piker would be swearing by now. But there should be a line. There should be a rule where we cannot blame everything on others or their lack of support. This MH issue is not others problems, it is ours and we should not expect others to support us through it.

Others, even significant others should be allowed to walk away at any time without attack from us. They have a right to.

SM

xCrumpetx · ‎11-01-2018

Hello mushroom,

i am sorry to hear about the abuse you have suffered in your life. I think you are a nice person and very helpful 🙂

I agree, no one should be abused or attacked and people should take responsibility for what they have done.

I hope you are ok and are having a nice night.

from crumpet

Sad_Mushroom · ‎11-01-2018

Hi Crumpet,

Thanks for joining here and having a say....that took balls.

It's nice to see you stepping out into other threads.

I am having a nice night thanks. I have been invited to Karaoke. I do not sing but will dance.

SM

Elizabeth CP · ‎11-01-2018

SM your post touched a raw nerve. While I have zero tolerance for anyone who abuses their spouse unfortunately there are women who take advantage of situations leaving their partner to take the blame when it is unjustified.

Recently 2 people who I'm close to have had their sons fall victim to this. In one case the son went to bed after a hard day of work only to be woken by his wife, dtrs & their friends all drunk & loud. Request for quiet & the friends to leave was denied When he pushed his wife back as she deliberately pushed someone called the police & he was charged with assault & kicked out of his own house. Since everyone else were witnesses he had no way of fighting the allegation.

Another friend's son has been wrongly accused of abuse & unable to see his wife & children. It appears that the wife may have some MH issues which she refuses to get help for which has led to the accusations which have become more bizarre over time with things he did to help her twisted out of context & made into something very different.

As SM said we do need to be cautious of believing everything we are told without knowing both sides.

Ggrand · ‎12-01-2018

Hello Sad Mushroom,

Sorry I haven't been in here for a few days, if it's ok I will read and catch up with what's happening / happened in you life and be back soon.

Karen

Sad_Mushroom · ‎24-01-2018

Hi Elizabeth,

My son had the same issue.

He had a GF and he paid for a unit and furnished it. They broke up and he began seeing a new girl. They fought and he got an AVO against him,,,,,,,no problem.

A few months later that new girl turned up at my sons unit at 3am going off her nut after a night out. Neighbours called police about the noise and my son was arrested for breaching his AVO.

My son got arrested for being in bed in his own unit at 3am!!!!!!!!!!!!

He refused to open the door because of the AVO and she stood outside kicking and screaming until the police arrived. She walked off and the police arrested my son.

I went to the police station the next day and explained it was HIS unit and he LIVED there and charges were dropped. We had to provide leases and rent receipts though.

Mind you here father is a federal police officer so we have no doubt that influenced the police.

My son did nothing wrong,,,,was in bed asleep and got arrested for being in his own unit.

Not everything is what people say it is. We have to be careful about things like that.

SM

Sad_Mushroom · ‎24-01-2018

Hi Karen,

I'm OK but for a few weeks my brain has been awol.

My depression is gone and has been for years and you would think that would be the end of it.

It isn't.

I do not have depression but I have 'attack'. I realise I want to get back at people who caused me this.

I will work through it. It's just another step.

Kellie

Ggrand · ‎24-01-2018

Hello Sad Mushroom,

I just read you post on DB's thread, thank you for posting it again. I needed to read that today.

Karen

Sad_Mushroom · ‎07-02-2018

Hi GG,

My head is still awol so I'm not posting much.

I'm back in counselling every Thursday. Not for anxiety or depression but my anger/rage issues.

I will make another post in a more suitable place as I keep forgetting not to post 'trigger' issues here.

SM

Ggrand · ‎08-02-2018

Hello Sad Mushroom,

Im pleased your back into counciling for your anger.

I don't struggle with anger, I was conditioned very early in my childhood that I wasn't allowed anger, therefore it has not developed in me. All my abusers have passed on except for my older brother, I haven't seen or spoken to him in over 50 years, although I don't have anger towards him I have hate towards him.

I think the best revenge, or getting back at your abusers is to live a happy and fulfilled life. You have risen above anxiety and Depression which is imo one of the hardest things in life to get over. You are such a lovely person Sad Mushroom, and you have lifted my soul a few times here with your kindness.

I hope your Pysch visit goes well.

Kindness always,

Grandy.