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Just Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 715

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

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Progmaster social networking and depression/anxiety
  • replies: 4

I am interested how people with depression and anxiety deal with social networking sites like Facebook. I have Bipolar II and am also Asperger's. I am worried people I am friends with block my statuses and tags which makes me over-analyse the situati... View more

I am interested how people with depression and anxiety deal with social networking sites like Facebook. I have Bipolar II and am also Asperger's. I am worried people I am friends with block my statuses and tags which makes me over-analyse the situation and not know where I stand with them, especially when they are sometimes stand-offish with me face to face even though they know about my condition and know I am trying to improve myself with exercise etc. I have deliberately started posting less because when I don't get likes from people I want to get likes from, I start thinking they are snubbing me or are sick of me and have blocked my statuses. Sorry if this seems whiny or self-pitying but I am prone to analyse the smallest detail to the nth degree. If I brought this up in a conversation it would seem petty or ridiculous but this stuff unfortunately really gets in my head and I am interested if anyone else worries they might have alienated other people (not deliberately) and that perceived snubbing on social networks needlessly increases anxiety and depression.

MrsCam next phase of recovery... feeling a bit anxious...
  • replies: 18

Hi all, I am discharging from Perth Clinic on saturday and will be flying home to the pilbara on tuesday evening... feeling a bit anxious about leaving my safe little bubble Ive got going on here... was thrown a curve ball this afternoon when I had t... View more

Hi all, I am discharging from Perth Clinic on saturday and will be flying home to the pilbara on tuesday evening... feeling a bit anxious about leaving my safe little bubble Ive got going on here... was thrown a curve ball this afternoon when I had to change rooms here in the hospital from the one Ive had since I was admitted 15 days ago to a new one on the other floor. Surprised at how anxious that made me feel, burst into tears once I was alone in the new room. Was able to breathe my way through that so I guess that is a positive.... trying to remain upbeat & positive about going home, will try to remember to take it one day at a time...

Gab253 Where do I start? Want to do more with my life
  • replies: 4

Hi, I'm new to this forum, but I'm struggling a bit at the moment. Here's my story, I'm 29 years old, and I live in a rural area in Victoria with my dad. In April this year, I lost my dearest friend. I've known her all my life and she was like a sist... View more

Hi, I'm new to this forum, but I'm struggling a bit at the moment. Here's my story, I'm 29 years old, and I live in a rural area in Victoria with my dad. In April this year, I lost my dearest friend. I've known her all my life and she was like a sister to me, and she was only 31. I miss her terribly. I'm unemployed, and I've never really had a job. I've had a few part time jobs here and there, but they have rarely lasted more than a week. I'm overweight, and I eat rubbish food. I think being overweight, and getting very sore contributes to me not being able to last long in jobs. I also have high blood pressure, which I am not taking medication for. I drink a little more alcohol than I'd like to, but I can control it, and I can easily go for 1 or more days without drinking. I struggle financially week to week, and I often find that my bank acc is overdrawn by the end of the week, putting me further and further into debt. I am only about $1500 in debt at the moment however, most of which is to my dad. I live in a very cluttered enviroment, which is partially due to me not having enough money to get rid of all my rubbish, and I hoard junk. I have asperger's syndrome which is part of the autism spectrum disorder. I don't have alot of friends, however the friends I do have are very good friends. I want to do more with my life, and get out and about a bit more, but at this stage, I don't want a regular "job" I don't know what activities are out there for someone like me. I have been looking into a Men's shed. That seems like a good idea for me at the moment. I'm after some suggestions of some activities that may be available to me? Possibly some that will help me get fitter and improve my general health too. I'd also like a bit of advice on how I can eat a bit healthier. I'm looking at the idea of doing a course too. Loosing my dearest friend has really hit me hard and I miss her so much I think about her every day. What are some other things that I could possibly look into? I mainly want to improve my health, my happiness and my financial situation. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Cheers, Gab

AGrace Suggestions for inexpensive activities
  • replies: 5

Hi Everyone, I've been reading a few posts of late where the topic of hobbies/exercise/other activities to assist with mental well being have been raised. I also understand that mental illness (like any other illness) can be a very expensive element ... View more

Hi Everyone, I've been reading a few posts of late where the topic of hobbies/exercise/other activities to assist with mental well being have been raised. I also understand that mental illness (like any other illness) can be a very expensive element to treat. For a lot of us due to inability to work, or work full time, plus the additional costs of medication, Dr's and Specialists finances can be drained really quickly. I think we hear all the time how much lifestyle and in particular physical activities can have a positive effect on our mental health, and most of us would agree this is true. As we don't often have the funds for additional activities I wanted to find out from everyone what activities they've been doing to help with recovery and staying well, more specifically activities that are either free or at least inexpensive. So I'll start... Going to the Library to read rather than staying at home. You can be guaranteed a quiet space and lots of books to choose from (if you haven't visited your own State Library now could be your chance) Signing up for activities at your local community centre. Often these are free or have a small cost involved. There are a broad range of activities on offer from learning a language to art and craft and yoga Visiting your local botanic garden rather than a park. Usually entry is free and you can walk around or sit and have a coffee Shopping at your local market. This can get a little noisy and crowded but it's also full of atmosphere and has a lot more culture than the local supermarket. It's also a great way to source really fresh produce Going for a drive, catching a train, tram, or bus. You can pick a favourite destination, or a place you haven't visited before Walking around your nearest city. Take a camera with you and stroll all the laneways and get pictures of buildings or art Find out if your nearest suburb/city offers free tai chi or yoga in the park. This can be a great way to kickstart your morning So I'd love to hear from others. I'm sure we can come up with heaps of suggestions!! AGrace

mack74 Something I thought was normal
  • replies: 2

Recently I began to feel very dark,like I had limited time left and that i had nothing worthy to contribute to life in general. Even though I had married and have three beautiful boys,a house and a full time job that was making sure all the bills wer... View more

Recently I began to feel very dark,like I had limited time left and that i had nothing worthy to contribute to life in general. Even though I had married and have three beautiful boys,a house and a full time job that was making sure all the bills were paid,there was still an emptiness that was getting worse by the week. Masking it with alcohol worked for a while but then it was like what ever it was that was lurking beneath had to come out,,,and nothing was going to hide it. Except I didn't know what it was and it was literally driving me insane! I decided to see my g.p. who did blood tests that showed I had nothing to fear mortally for a forty year old but was recommended to see a psychologist to see where it took me. The darkness was getting worse until I saw the psych and then he managed to unearth what was eating away at me.i can't remember what it was called but he did a verbal test on me that determined I was high anxiety and deeply depressed. However upon further examination and determining that I was quite happy with my domestic and work life,the physiologist said "ok we have to go deeper",where he related stories to me about how nerves in the brain work and how serotonin deflects the sadness we feel. Also that the serotonin can be depleted in the learning stages of our life by negative learning experiences, as soon as he said that I clicked and a wage of emotion poured over me!When I was younger "15 years old" I had been an apprentice in a panel shop. The foreman was an incredibly negative person and I had seen his effect on others and therefore thought that his brutal mental abuse was normal and to be expected as an apprentice. I began to smoke dope on a nightly basis and drink alcohol as a way of dealing with it and didn't dare talk about it because I thought as an apprentice it was a "right of passage",something I had to endure. So here I was twenty four years later,wondering why I feel like crap,and the psychologist had pointed out to me that while my brain was still in a learning stage,this brutal oppressor had instilled in me a mindset that I was useless and wouldn't amount to anything by ways and means I won't put down here?What I would like to share is that even though I am by no means "out of the woods",please,,,if your feeling real dark and it's getting worse because you don't know why,,,please talk to SOMEONE!,you never know what you might uncover on your road to recovery!

Jo3 Thankyou BB
  • replies: 1

I'm writing to say thank you to BB for the email you sent me today. Last night I had a really good session with my regular therapist, but when I came home my mood changed dramatically. I wrote a post here but it was not published. BB emailed me priva... View more

I'm writing to say thank you to BB for the email you sent me today. Last night I had a really good session with my regular therapist, but when I came home my mood changed dramatically. I wrote a post here but it was not published. BB emailed me privately to make sure I was okay and to give support and recommendations of who to contact and use some of my coping skills. I just want to say to BB that I did phone my own therapist this afternoon and we spoke about what happened last night and how I was feeling. I am okay now, still taking slow steps. I am so thankful for your caring supportive team that emailed me. Thanks again Jo

OZ911 My anxiety and depression is a formidable opponent, but I refuse to lose
  • replies: 1

Looking back over the years I could see signs of anxiety as a kid. Scared of the dark, fear of talking to people, petrified of spiders, & so on. No reasons for it that I could think of. Growing up, and then as an adult, I just accepted it as the way ... View more

Looking back over the years I could see signs of anxiety as a kid. Scared of the dark, fear of talking to people, petrified of spiders, & so on. No reasons for it that I could think of. Growing up, and then as an adult, I just accepted it as the way I was, and never thought anything of it, because it didn't really impact on my lifeoverly. Then last year it hit me with a vengeance. I'd just turned 48, and I had a major meltdown. Within a period of 5 months we'd moved house, our best friend's marriage broke up, my pop passed away, stress at work, & my wife was sick, not getting better, and we didn't know what it was. Not much joy here. Pop's passing also brought back memories of when mum passed away suddenly 17 years earlier. Never could understand why that happened. I was at rock bottom, & considered suicide a few times, but managed to resist it. Went to a counselor, started on mindfulness & mild medication, and things were slowly looking up. Then in October my world crumbled. My wife was diagnosed with incurable cancers. I was losing my best friend. This floored me at first, then I thought of her and our kids, and how it would be for them without my support. I realised I'dmade the right decision to not end it all. I stopped seeing my counselor in January. I've made great progress, and I'm on the RTR. My dad was great support as well. He'd been through it when mum died, and he knew the dangers that lay ahead if I didn't get help. #lovemydad Then, a few weeks ago, it hit me again. We live with my wife's parents now (she has constant care while I'm at work) and we have a 9 month old Beagle. The dog thought it would be fun to chew on a chair. This sent me into a spin. With the immediate support of those around me I was able to quickly regain my focus and get back on track. It's damn hard - every day is a struggle of sorts. I've had great support from my employer & work colleagues, friends at the footy club, & mostly, from family and close friends. In particular, our very close friend who's marriage went sour. She has depression also, and we often just talk to each other about what's troubling us. It helps us both. There are still some who don't understand it though, for whatever reason.I treat my anxiety & depression as my formidable opponent, and I refuse to lose. Like Holmes & Moriarty, I know there will be days when Moriarty has his little victory, but Sherlock Holmes will triumph in the end. That's my story.beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

MyBlackDogBites Road to Recovery
  • replies: 5

Having depression/anxiety for most of my life, managing without having episodes greatly affect my "public persona". I had been seeing a shrink for a couple of years, with treatment options confined to standard anti-depressants. Then came along 2010. ... View more

Having depression/anxiety for most of my life, managing without having episodes greatly affect my "public persona". I had been seeing a shrink for a couple of years, with treatment options confined to standard anti-depressants. Then came along 2010. Will a full time job requiring high levels of travel, studying for a MBA, volunteering in Cambodia, loosing my first dog, getting married, and having my grand-mother die the following day. The cracks began to appear and during a Sydney stay I managed to manage my third suicide attempt. I discovered "self harm" as way of coping with a world that was collapsing around me. Another suicide attempt ended with me off to hospital, and a painfully daily follow up with the CAT team. 2013 saw me fired from 2 very good jobs, and a continued decline in health. Come 2nd Jan 2014, I had my first 2 .5 week admin to hospital for ECT, closely followed by an additional 2 weeks of treatment. NOTE: ECT not only affects short term, but also made swiss cheese of my long term memory. I was without employment for 7 months and beginning to think that it wasn't going to happen. I have been required to have a few transfusions due to sever anaemia, the last of which was 2 weeks ago. So here I am today, 7 weeks into my new job with a great company. I continue to take 4 anti-depessants. I no longer have to see my shrink every second day, and Im very confident that I am on the road to recovery. The collateral damage of the last few years is the loss of friendship of some colleagues, and a weight gain, which at its peak was 40kg above normal. Only 30 kg to go. Wish me luck.

white knight EAGLEFREE-have you ever found it?
  • replies: 1

Mentioned a few times on these pages was my first marraige breakdown in 1996 and the only time I had suicidal thoughts. A couple of years later my cousin had suffered a sever back injury and depression evolved from it. Following a big operation he wa... View more

Mentioned a few times on these pages was my first marraige breakdown in 1996 and the only time I had suicidal thoughts. A couple of years later my cousin had suffered a sever back injury and depression evolved from it. Following a big operation he was advised to walk and walk and walk to strengthen his back muscles. He returned to Tasmania and walked in remote areas. One time he stood on a cliff face and was in so much pain he wanted to jump. He looked up and saw a wedge tailed eagle soaring above him. The spirit connected and he walked on. A day or so later he rang me from Tasmania's highest peak Mt Ossa. EAGLEDREAM AND EAGLEFREE Pity those so many souls that cannot sing or imagine the lift of an eagles wing... To get to Eagledream U-turn from devil's drop right at suicide dock brake at satan's falls and at Mt Ossa prop. Then hug the love of all of trekker and the unaware those that stared into an eagle's eye to feel what life really means - to visit eagledream. Close your eyes arms above your head flatten weary palms hear naught being said wait for an eagle to land stroke his bold chest embrace eaglefest thank the hunters heart then free him....all in your mind Devil's drop a distant memory as the eagle soars like jetstream pity those, so many souls - that never find eagledream.... WK About eight months later I went to Tassy. I told my cousin that in honour of his experience, his pain, his spiritual connection with that eagle and his (in my eyes) heroic survival, I'd got a tattoo on my arm of an eagle. I called it eaglefree. He looked at me the lifted his own shirt to reveal a tattoo of an eagle. We had both got them weeks before without each others knowledge. His called his eagledream. Two words meaning survival from enduring pain, depression and desperation......and survival. Spiritual connection can come in so many forms. In my view love is the strongest spirit, to give love and appreciate any return you get. Not expecting return is the best mindset. Just like that eagle that day, totally unexpected but life changing. The end result was - life can turn around, it can be magnificent, rewarding and different to what you once thought when you were at your lowest.......and it can be spiritual.

white knight POSITIVE THINKING!!! I WAS WRONG.
  • replies: 6

For some time I've promoted the concept. To inject positive thoughts in your head to assist in your recovery of depression or maybe permanently change the way you approach life so your day to day routine is energised. Below are extracts of a newspape... View more

For some time I've promoted the concept. To inject positive thoughts in your head to assist in your recovery of depression or maybe permanently change the way you approach life so your day to day routine is energised. Below are extracts of a newspaper article on this subject that dispells the theory. While I still believe positive thinking can help in some cases, perhaps where medication is right and symptoms subside it could be a welcome addition. However these quotes of this report clearly states that positive motivation is not what is recommended when in deep depression. by Associate professor Anthony GRANT and Dr Suzy GREEN How often have you been told to "look on the bright side" or "focus on the good things" when times are tough?It can feel as though every self help book , TV show or family member wants you to stop feeling sad, angry or depressed and find the silver lining in every situation. Proponents of positive thinking would have us believe that it's one of the best ways to boost self esteem, find happiness and even prevent some illnesses such as depression. But how effective is it? According to social psychologist Anthony Grant , the term "positive thinking" is poorly defined and largely misunderstood. For many people it means saying daily affirmations focusing on the good in every situation and putting on a happy face even when its the last thing we feel like doing. But Grant warns trying to be permanently optimistic about life is highly unrealistic and generally makes you feel worse off in the long run. "It just doesnt work" When people dont allow themselves to think about problems or sadness or any other emotion apart from happiness, it's not helpful at all he explained. "In difficult periods of your life you need to allow yourself to grieve and have a whole range of emotions, because thats part of the natural healing process". A 2009 study found positive self statements only improve mood and well being in people that already have high self esteem. In people with low self esteem it has the opposite effect. The above is a revelation. Readers can google extracts of the above and the Dr's name to seek the full report. WK