Staying well

Support each other to stay well, from mindfulness, sleep, diet and exercise to reducing drug and alcohol use and coping with difficult emotions.

FAQ

Find answers to some of the more frequently asked questions on the Forums.

Forums guidelines

Our guidelines keep the Forums a safe place for people to share and learn information.

Pinned discussions

Just Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 715

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

All discussions

Luke_4_you Cut the rope that binds you
  • replies: 30

I thought about my life & when I was young, I often focussed on the trials of life. I didn’t understand that so often a fear or doubt was “tied”, like an invisible rope, back to hurts or “bad times” of the past. This “rope” would control my life. Con... View more

I thought about my life & when I was young, I often focussed on the trials of life. I didn’t understand that so often a fear or doubt was “tied”, like an invisible rope, back to hurts or “bad times” of the past. This “rope” would control my life. Conscious efforts to overcome it would not work. A few years ago I realised that what controlled me were lies or deceptions that drew my focus to the “ropes”, and that the “ropes” could be cut. I was able to understand that the hurts, lies, mis-use, manipulation, etc. throughout life often resulted in resentments against the people responsible. Often, old hurts, etc. were hidden and I no longer consciously thought about them. Quite a few years ago I was given a Christian brochure. "Forgiveness is the power that heals!" ... very simply, if you put your trust in God to accept your forgiveness of those who have wronged you, He will help you with many other benefits. A few days later I opened the brochure and home alone, I decided, "I will give this a go!" I took a large pad and pen and looked up and said, "God, I think I have forgiven everyone, but please reveal to me the names of anyone I need to forgive!" Almost immediately "Your grandparents", came into my thoughts. My reply was, "What do I have to forgive them for, they died before I was born?" Immediately I "heard", "Because you were cranky at them dying, because you didn't have grandparents like other children!" ... I thought, "Correct!" and started the list. Over the next hour or so I listed about 30 names (including myself a few times) ... I was amazed how I could recall the names and the circumstances. I then "pictured (as best as I could recall)" each person coming to me. I advised them that I forgave them and told them of the incident(s) that caused me to be hurt. I then directed them to Jesus, Who was sitting on a seat nearby, “He will forgive you as well.” It took over 2 hours to go through the list. The result, from that day, not a headache, a cold nor a twinge from a previous crippling backache, nor any other illness. I gave it “a go” and I received amazing results. The brochure I read is available off the internet. Simply key in "Forgiveness the power that heals".(it was created by Dick Innes, an Australian now living in California). I believed it was going to work and I received! All those ropes/ties holding me back were cut . I didn’t look back, I just keep giving thanks and forgiving anyone else that does me wrong.

white knight Your life priorities
  • replies: 4

Our number one priority in life is our children. Beyond that, its ourselves. We owe it to our loved ones to do our best to survive life. Its a personal responsibility of the highest order. What about beyond that? What is our duty in life? Making inco... View more

Our number one priority in life is our children. Beyond that, its ourselves. We owe it to our loved ones to do our best to survive life. Its a personal responsibility of the highest order. What about beyond that? What is our duty in life? Making income, providing shelter, seeking nutritious food and other basic needs.? Many with mental illness struggle for direction, for meaning in life, a feeling of worthlessness. If this is how you feel, there is much hope. Lack of focus on the valuable things in life can leave you in a daunting situation of just "existing". This can often leave you empty and spiral you into an abyss of despair where you think there is little hope of meaning, of value and of fulfillment. In contrast as an example someone the helps other people daily gets that personal satisfaction as a constant inner reward, a feeling of satisfaction that produces a spring in ones step. Why?. What is it that uplifts us when helping others? I believe its a primitive need. Beyond our priorities of caring for our children then ourselves, we as humans need to care for others as a means of survival as a race. To last hundreds of thousands of years we had to care for each other. Helping other people produces vigor. After being a good Samaritan for an old person in need, to care for disabled people. It means we have direction, something to feel proud of. Its doing what's right. An old lady friend of mine, a widow, in her late 70's is a prime example. She'd never roamed outside her home. It was suggested to her to attend the local Salvo shop to volunteer her time. Her first day was hard, being introduced to staff, but after her first cuppa and chat she was on her way. People in need with their pride dented entered that shop and left with some bare basics like blankets and children's clothes. The words of appreciation saved her from her life of misery. She found smiles. Now she runs the shop. Her whole focus is helping those in need. She is in effect satisfying that primitive part of herself...helping fellow human beings. To her there is no better feeling. She is alive! Oddly enough, and it is not only ironic but makes a lot of sense, that lady is very rich. Her wealth is now however not just in equity but in compassion. Do you feel you lack meaning in your life? Do you have a story of what uplifted you from despair? Tell us about it. Make us smile Tony WK

Guest_2350 Helpful strategies for anger
  • replies: 11

Hello All, I am realising lately that I have battled angry phases most of my life and I would be really grateful if you shared your helpful and positive strategies to deal with anger. Running and physical exercise is something I have used before and ... View more

Hello All, I am realising lately that I have battled angry phases most of my life and I would be really grateful if you shared your helpful and positive strategies to deal with anger. Running and physical exercise is something I have used before and it helps. Unfortunately I cannot exercise as I used to - and I struggle with motivation to do easier exercises. Stomping instead of walking helps only to a certain degree. Meditation is difficult when I am angry as my mind just races and does not want to calm down. Any ideas how I can get my mind to slow down so I can meditate? I would love to be able to step away from my angry thoughts. I am able to control my anger in front of other people, but I think that only adds to my isolation and feeling frustrated and misunderstood. I don't think I ever realised what an angry person I am. I am not even sure if that is the right word. There are so many emotions that come up, but lately I have "lovingly" named this recurring mood "angry bird days" in an attempt to make them a little bit lighter. I cycle between angry bird, sad face, numb numb and present. At least I now know these cycles come to an end, whether it is an hour, a day or a week... I do have meds to take when I struggle and I do have a psych but I would really like to know what else might have helped other people. Thank you, take care, Yggy

Guest_3072 Healthy Eating and Exercise Tips??
  • replies: 2

Hi everyone, I just thought I'd post on here that I want to be more disciplined with healthy eating and starting a regular exercise routine. I already know what I need to do, I just need help with motivation and keeping myself on track. Does anybody ... View more

Hi everyone, I just thought I'd post on here that I want to be more disciplined with healthy eating and starting a regular exercise routine. I already know what I need to do, I just need help with motivation and keeping myself on track. Does anybody else have any tips on how I can stick to healthier eating and my exercise routines without relapsing, which is something that I have gone through time and time again? Kind regards, Gabby

Faithh Put your positive stories of bounce backs and recovery here! :)
  • replies: 10

Good evening friends! I just wanted to start a thread of positivity, as I've been having a bit of a hard day with general anxiety/panic/thinking too deeply about life to a point of kiiiiind of depersonalization/how do I even exist!? Ha! Existential c... View more

Good evening friends! I just wanted to start a thread of positivity, as I've been having a bit of a hard day with general anxiety/panic/thinking too deeply about life to a point of kiiiiind of depersonalization/how do I even exist!? Ha! Existential crisis!! It's always a bit harder when I'm having a quiet day alone, so hoping to hear from some of you lovely people! I guess I just want to say that since joining BB last week (why didn't i join earlier!!) it has really helped to 'normalise' me and make me feel less alone. Logically I know I'm not alone in this fight, however of course I do feel like I'm the only one feeling these emotions! It's always such a relief to pop online here and read/catch up with threads which can always help, even if it's a little bit. I couldn't go see my therapist today as she wasn't feeling well, so coming here has helped a touch. I would love to hear your own experiences of panic and existential type deep thoughts and how you recovered or are recovering! Thanks so much guys, means the world to me! xx Faithh

The_Abyss Triumph against adversity - your stories of beating the odds, surviving hardship, or "winning" at the end
  • replies: 5

It was recently suggested that I start this thread to collect your stories (and put down my own) around the theme of beating adversity. Was there a time you thought all was lost, only to come through a "winner" in the end? A time when you were having... View more

It was recently suggested that I start this thread to collect your stories (and put down my own) around the theme of beating adversity. Was there a time you thought all was lost, only to come through a "winner" in the end? A time when you were having a bad day, but a touch of kindness turned things around? A time you thought you'd never make it though, only to come up grinning? A time when the going got tough and the tough got going? They don't have to be happy stories, just happy endings! Time to rack the brain and get story telling!

Quercus Let's find the JOY in life!
  • replies: 15

Hi Everyone, I've been mentioning to a few people lately keeping busy to keep the blues at bay and trying new things to keep me excited about and hopeful in life... There is so much to enjoy in life but sometimes we are in a place that we can't see i... View more

Hi Everyone, I've been mentioning to a few people lately keeping busy to keep the blues at bay and trying new things to keep me excited about and hopeful in life... There is so much to enjoy in life but sometimes we are in a place that we can't see it. So here is a place for all of us to share practical joyful activities that are achieveable (or things that are adventurous) to inspire eachother Bring on the happiness My suggestions for today.... 1) Check your library notice board for free courses being held. My local running a talk on introduction to beekeeping! And it's free! 2) For those in WA there are a series of books published by the Dept of Environment and Conservation called "Walks in Perth Outdoors" and "Bushwalks in the Southwest". They are amazing and include maps and grades of difficulty. I cannot recommend them enough. 3) Pour a bucket of hot water and epsom salts and soak your feet at the end of the day while you watch tv or read a book. Hope to hear what ideas other people have

The_Possum Thai Massage
  • replies: 2

A new business recently opened in my area - Thai Massage boasting that it is useful in the treatment of depression and other mental health disorders. I've been to one before a few years ago for a shoulder injury playing tennis, in which they really g... View more

A new business recently opened in my area - Thai Massage boasting that it is useful in the treatment of depression and other mental health disorders. I've been to one before a few years ago for a shoulder injury playing tennis, in which they really got their elbow into my back to release the knots. It was painful and far from anything I'd consider depression releasing. Anyone have any experience with this?

white knight CONTROLLING YOUR LIFE how important is it?
  • replies: 5

This is a question I've asked myself for a while ... I'm saying that I've sensed there are some people that's lives are suppressed by their partners or family members and they have little control over their actions, lack of the freedoms some of us ha... View more

This is a question I've asked myself for a while ... I'm saying that I've sensed there are some people that's lives are suppressed by their partners or family members and they have little control over their actions, lack of the freedoms some of us have without permission or lack of even free thoughts. Such "ownership" can be of great concern and I wonder how many of these caged people have mental illness from it or think they do but all along they have really been grossly unhappy. A mental prisoner of sorts? In the end the level of control a person can withstand is subjective I'd suggest. Meaning it is up to them. none of us outsiders can say- he is controlling you too much and you should put a stop to it. We only hear one side of the story. It could for example be that the poster is feeling controlled but really isnt being controlled but being cared for. Years ago I had a female friend that suffered from a psychiatric illness. She was in a daze most days due to her medication. Her husband seemed to control her every move. But the more I got to know the situation the more I realised why he was how he was and I probably would have ended up just as controlling.Some people cannot function normally. Another example. I had a hobby (model airplanes) when living with my defacto wife. I spent money almost daily on my hobby, $5 here and there (propellers wood glue etc). Some time after my initial diagnosis (bipolar 2, dysthymia, anxiety and depression) my wife began her secret quest to control all finances. Eventually I was on an allowance, which made me feel like a teenager on pocket money. I was earning twice the income she earned. Eventually arguements began. We had the following one- Her "how much money do you think you have spent on your hobby over the last 7 years"? Me "about $11,000" Her "have you got any reason to be proud of that" Me "Well it is a lot less than the $35,000 you have spent on cigarettes" It was one of the few times I guessed the question was coming. Eventually it was one reason for us separating. In my case I had every right to defend myself against an element of unjust control. My now wife of 3 years and I have no control over each other. We do of course have obligations, commitment, dedication and all those other things that come with a good marriage. But control isnt there. And we are happier for it. Putting it out there. Is excessive control over others a big factor with peoples mental health?

Loco23 Space and Universe
  • replies: 2

Hi Everyone i was wondering whether I'm the only one on here that feels the same way when watching a space doco or podcast. Whenever im feeling pretty overwhelmed or stressed, s doco on the universe that makes you feel so small kind of helps with tre... View more

Hi Everyone i was wondering whether I'm the only one on here that feels the same way when watching a space doco or podcast. Whenever im feeling pretty overwhelmed or stressed, s doco on the universe that makes you feel so small kind of helps with treating anxiety ? It's very hard to explain but I strongly suggest it.