Living a worthwhile life

[white knight]

Lately on this forum we've had a number of sad souls that for whatever reason, are in a "worthless" boring life.

The hard line answer with this problem is that we are all responsible for our own happiness. We need to read the newspapers for local hobbies, sports and social events for interaction. Or google, a great tool we never had 20 years ago.

But its easier said than done. Some of us regardless of our ability to find the company of others can't extend ourselves to what its like to not be so talkative.

If you are introverted or simply are in a rut please google

Topic: depression, the "snowball effect"- beyondblue

It is important to find motivation...how?

Well there is no easy first steps. It is important to find your comfort zone with groups. Some groups are breeding grounds for destructive attitudes, don't hang around them, move on, find that comfort zone. If you are not happy in a group it doesn't mean its your fault.

Confidence is elusive. You have to keep fighting to achieve it.

Topic: being withdrawn to achieving confidence- beyondblue

Even those of us that have broken through the social brick wall to get the confidence we badly need we still have doubt. We always will.

Perhaps we never got told how good a boy or girl we were often enough.? But we can make life worthwhile. Voluntary work is a favourite of mine. Its an avenue to begin your snowball of happiness.

Do you know of ways to make life worthwhile?

Tony WK

[blondguy]

Hi Tony WK

another great topic and thanks Tony 🙂

Thats an excellent way of phrasing our mindset, by snowballing our happiness....

These are just what I use to maintain some joy in my life

• tending to mother earth (gardening/landscaping)
• being a volunteer on the Beyond Blue forums to try to help others
• being gentle to myself and taking pride in being a simple person, not an intellectual one
• using mindlessness, not mindfulness
• caring for people face to face or by phone (not just on here) that are experiencing major life issues
• being aware of the negative groups, the negative effect of social media where people can drag us down
• understanding how we can truly make our lives less 'complicated' thus increasing our life enjoyment

Great thread Tony WK

Paul

[white knight]

Thanks Paul.

I like all of those especially the last two.

Im sure you'd agree that voluntary work or just good deeds make life worthwhile.

Tony WK

[splodge]

I agree that these activities are positive and that responsibility lies with the individual. However depression makes living a worthwhile life difficult to impossible in my opinion. Severe depression makes any action at all unrealistic. Milder but chronic, never ending depression simply robs these activities of any pleasure or purpose.

It is all about motivation. Humans have a limited ability to force themselves to do things they gain no reward from. You can force yourself to work even though you hate it because there is an obvious reward. If there was no reward you would stop almost immediately. The problem with suffering depression is that it destroys any sense of reward and purpose and so motivation. I think people try and do these things but without feeling any reward the motivation rapidly fades as there is no point in continuing with an unrewarding activity. People in this position generally try and retreat into a more limited world where any sense of life being worthwhile is traded for the more realistic goal of as much peace of mind as possible and avoidance of pain.

[white knight]

Hi Splodge

Severe and/or chronic depression might well have you immobile, incapable of even motivating yourself to move.

But when the day presents itself when the depressive cycle rises from the lows thats when one can and should try to improve your life.

I have depression, bipolar2, dysthymia and had anxuety. I know whst its like to have psychotic episodes and be immobile. But it would be defeatist to think I'll never be well enough to walk past the front door into society.

Dont you believe you can pursue a worthwhile life?

Tony WK

[Doolhof]

Hi Splodge, Tony and All,

Firstly Tony, thanks for an interesting and thought provoking thread topic. I agree with Splodge that at times it is really difficult to find even a smidge of motivation to do anything at all, let alone anything worthwhile and related to pleasure.

As difficult as it is, for me it is very important to push myself to do so even if I don't feel any sense of pleasure or meaning in the process or the result. If I don't, then I fall even further into the pit of despair.

When I was last taken to hospital, I asked my husband to bring in some craft work for me to do. As miserable and deeply depressed as I was, I forced myself to do something, even if it was just 10 minutes.

Recently I pushed myself to attend a craft group I had never been to before. It was hard. I wanted to drive right past the building. Once I made it to the building, I wanted to run away. When near the room holding the craft group, I wanted to walk past the door.

I managed to walk in, to introduce myself, found a chair and started my craft. It was hard. Darn hard. Now I am so thankful I managed to walk in and not run away home again. It was very worthwhile feeling awkward and uncomfortable, like I didn't belong and all those other things our brain tells us.

Now I happily attend, have a chat and a laugh. It is fun. I enjoy it. It is worthwhile.

Wishing you all worthwhile moments even if it is a struggle.

Cheers from Mrs. D.

[white knight]

Hi Mrs Dools

I think you enraptured it in a nutshell.

Admire your tenacity

Tony WK

[Doolhof]

Hi Tony,

Thanks. If my words can help one person make it outside their own home today I will be very thankful.

In writing my achievements, it encourages me to continue on as well.

Today I am off tot he Op Shop where you never know whom or what you will encounter. It is a mini adventure of discovery.

Cheers to you and All from Mrs. D.