Afraid of the future.

[Browngirl16]

Hi!

Just a little about myself, i have general anxiety and depression and have been attending psychology sessions and will be starting medication soon.

My current situation is regarding my niece and nephew who have been living in the same house as me since birth. They are currently the only two people who provide me with any happiness and are my reasons for living. I sleep next to my niece every night and if she is not there, i cannot sleep, that is how strong our bond is.

But my sister and her husband have decided to move away to another country with my niece and nephew. I am terrified of what is going to happen when they leave. Will i lose the will to survive? Right now, i am only living for them. How do i take care of myself when my only reasons of happiness are no longer around?

If anyone has any tips or similar experiences and can provide me with any help, it would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks!

[white knight]

Hi, welcome

Separation anxiety is common, even our mini foxy has it!

Perhaps it is a reason to focus on the buffer zone we should have with loved ones, to protect ourselves?

But, how were you to know your bond would develop with such intensity having been together since birth?

Your real problem browngirl, is that sooner or later such separation was going to occur, like going overseas, marriage, Jobs away from home and so on.

I think the best way to tackle this is setting up the SKYPE communication app and keep regular contact but not in a frenzy...not daily, say twice a week. Limit your talk to 30 minutes.

For the rest of your time plunge into other distractions- study, part time work, hobby and sport... better still find a passion.

Time is a healer.

I hope that helps.

TonyWK

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi Browngirl16,

Thank you for your post.

I'm not sure how much your nieces and nephews moving will impact your will to survive; I think this is something only you know. They might be moving to a different country, but like TonyWK said, they are a Skype call away. They no doubt love you to pieces and will miss you, so just because they are living in a different place doesn't mean that they don't have to lose the significance they have on you. Your nieces and nephews can always be a part of your will to survive, no matter where they are in the world.

Sometimes it can be difficult when you feel like you're losing your reasons for happiness, and I guess personally I try to see what keeps me here. One of the reasons that kept me here initially was my dogs, knowing that they'd miss me. Another reason was that I didn't want to give up hope incase better things came along.

Have you talked about this with your psychologist/therapist in your sessions? He/she will know a lot more about you then us and might be able to help you with this. There's also another post here that might be worth reading, with other people sharing what keeps them here too - https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/suicidal-thoughts-and-self-harm/tell-us-your-thoughts---what-39-s-kept-or-keeping-you-here-

I hope this is helpful