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Lost, Confused, Feeling Numb

Community Member

I am still with my current partner, and becuase of a few infidelities in our relationship we are on a rocky road.

After a long discussion we have siad we will push forward, however I feel it maybe for our childrens sake.

I want to work through our issues, she says she does but with stipulations that suit her and no room for give and take.

My gut feeling is she doesnt want to be the one to split up out family, so she may be driving a wedge.

I need some advise through this situation:

*advise from fathers that have left their partners and does it work

*How are the kids going to cope

*how do I move forward without her opening up


Im lost and confused which is leaving me feeling numb inside, and im not sure if this numbness ghas me over thinking the situation.

1 Reply 1

white knight
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hi BGA, welcome to BB forums

Your information you provided is rather limited but I'll try to be relevant in my comments.

In 1996 my 2 daughters were 7 and 4yo when I left the family home. At the time I was unaware of the seriousness of my mental illnesses. My ex wife used silence as a weapon and her laziness was too much for me as I worked 3 jobs and held the home together. So I met my breaking point.

Due to that laziness my first concern was my kids and whether they would make it to school by 9am each morning as my ex used to sleep till noon or beyond and I, even on shift work had to do these tasks. I kept ringing the school principle, often in tears asking about their arrival times and their well being. Yes, my ex got them there on time and also, the principle told me "Tony kids are more resilient that us adults....stop worrying". It was sound advice.

I've read the rest of your post and it sounds like you are "gambling" on your future. I guess then you will need to wait and see, to find out how she commits to the relationship if indeed she does.

You ad your partner are strong candidates for relationship counselling and I advise you seek this avenue for help.

Good luck  Tony WK