living alone

[Guest_1584]

Wondering do you live alone if you don't mind me asking , and how long for , how do you find it ?

No need for any details if your not comfortable or anything like that, not prying just wondering about it all.

l've been living alone on off mostly 5yrs now since splitting with ex w. My daughter use to stay a lot but not much these days, 16, bf and friends over in her town, 20mins away . Also had a friend staying over a lot for awhile or me her place, separate rooms just friends. Then met my gf, together nearly two but 70% long distance,talking 24 7 non the mess but still mostly living alone. That ahsn't worked out and, still living alone.

It's the first time really since late teens and what a time of life for it to come along. l'm just wondering? l'm afraid l just can't get use to it or like it . Although times it's good also , like coming home tired, kick back for the night do your thing, watch what you want or sleep all day or listen to whatever you please as loud as you want day or night, no one else to worry about or please. It can be nice when the wk end rolls round too in ways , same reasons.

But , l still have a lot of trouble with it , don't think l'll ever get use to it. Even though there were plenty of times married would've given anything for this kinda freedom sometimes.

This house is pretty big , to me too big for one, one and a bit if my d stays. Not really into friends hangin round too often , assuming l had a few anyways, new town. But l think a smaller house would help , dunno how some people especially rich people live in monster mansions alone. l've even thought of sharing , got a spare room, it'd help the finances too. But tbh , getting a bit past that with a stranger and it'd cramp my style a bit and spoil the things l do like about this new life alone right now and having all this space to myself.

But over all , l'm really feeling the loneliness. Just don't know what to do about it though, how to deal with it . l feel like l'll get sorta lost in my own non existent world if l'm not careful. l do get out and about quite a bit actually but it's usually alone too. l've always enjoyed alone time even as a kid but l seem to have lost that these days and l find it's really taking it's toll on spirits and like life is passing by.

[Guest_1584]

Gday Geoff thanks for dropping in, appreciated. Nah the translations don't surprise at all these days l know l have to triple check , it can be a bit of a tight rope sometimes but a funny one. lt did earlier though only bc we'd both think we had it but later we find out we both had totally different.

But yeah , best friends too is a beautiful thing between a couple , l insist on it myself and l just love it about gf . We can tell each other anything, be anything, understanding and excepting, we just come from the same world like that. But nah , l don't just want just friends and no relationship, no couple , no us. A couple can be best friends too.

So l've tried to be all in my support not just a friend. She does appreciate it thanks me 20times a wk sometimes . But she doesn't seem to grasp that l'm in wait for "us" too , the couple us , and our future, that's the bit that worries me. But then she doesn't have the metal space right now either, bit of a rock and a hard place situation.

Hey cm , l really kinda like your Sunday thing with m , but it's been really nice to see some more time and different things finally creeping into it too , 5hrs a wks just not enough.

rx

[CMF]

Don't get me wrong, I love the Sunday thing, but yes, some different days/times Added would be nice

[Jstar49]

Hey Geoff,

funny you should say that, it seems to be how its worked out in the past.

Its our anniversary tonite and neither of us realised! H welcomed me home with 'Happy Anniversary"! And seemed really happy that hes not in the poo for forgetting- cos I forgot completely!

So, it's kinda ok. Gotta enjoy the good times, ride out the bad times.

really feeling for you RX cos I know what its like to ride the rollercoaster. Do what you need to my frined. I fugure, if the cards are still saying love, that can mean so many things.

Qu- If you guys take a break, and then GF rings you, needing to download, what is your boundary? Du listen? Du not answer and when you hear her msg, feel torn? Just a question, cos if you're on a break, you mite need to be clear what that means.

All the best,

J*

[Guest_1584]

Yeah not a tough one J.

Of course l would , so would she, neither of us would ever play those silly games.We.ll just go back to it later.

Congrats on the anni.

rx

[Guest_1584]

That's really nice about h, J. Hopefully you'll be too cosy'd up together tonight to be in here reading round BB, but he sounds like he's really turning a bit lately, so nice to hear.

Cards ha , don't talk to me.

You wouldn't believe it. l thought later after reading here earlier, l'm doing a read tonight. But the kicker was l thought l had my usual deck , have 2 and they're very similar but your best only use one and it builds up strength. Sounds mumbo jumbo to most l know but it's not believe me, 35yrs of them.

So , l've grabbed the wrong deck lights were off and there was only tv light,hate lights. l shuffled a lot more than usual to make sure l got an accurate brand new read. Love, happiness, a women. Nah they aren't talking just any love all this time, it's one woman right through. But to get these 3 together like this , again,and with a deck l didn't touch in 2yrs, that's as powerful as it gets. So it's still big love even with the wrong deck.

Excuse yet another card rant l know l've done a few but it is someone, someone present already not new. So it could only be gf, or ex. Well , ex wasn't always the way l described above , she had a little bit of bp that's all , but that did make things hard sometimes.Apart from that though she was incredible . But l haven't seen her or heard from her15mths.

And then there's gf now but tbh l think we're losing it, she just seems like it's gone sometimes. l mean she'll say stuff like she did about her love, or a dream, or coming down, but then she'll just flip and there's no feel of any love really. No baby, no lovie,no missing, almost cold.

l know , burn the bloody cards , stop talking about it.

rx

[Guest_1584]

l was gonna add but forgot , the only person on the planet cards are making any sense toward is gf . My daughter also does the cards and she gets gf every time she does me a read.

But l was gonna say that yeah , as l mentioned last post , she sure isn't feeling like big love lately , seems like the most unlikely actually . And l don't want her to reconnect with us just bc she's worn out and needs a place to live.

l know, burn the cards , l'm getting to it.

rx

[Guest_1584]

Well as usual right when l'm all negative she does something to help me keep the faith. Got some messages and chit chat today. That's one thing l just adore about us , we have no rules, either of us , break or no break we're so alike in ways which is so bloody rare for me bc l'm such an oddball haha.

But she's feeling the court cases will be very soon now, maybe around just after her sons baby, Mind you, she can;t tell if the feeling is anything either she gets very very real sometimes and can be dead on with feelings about a lot of things , another way we're very very alike but at the same time she also gets false alarms. l dunno , l tend to think they'll still be way into next yr that's why this on hold like this just feels like such a waste of time we may as well get the hell on with living we've come this far .

But l might be wrong tbh l just can't tell which makes it even more frustrating l'm only guessing. Until we get the letter of notices which come 30days before, not even the lawyers can find out.

Anyway , it was nice to hear from her and things she talked about and how she talked show we are still in there for her once again after all, today anyway, so at least that's something.

rx

[CMF]

Aaah rx my friend,

I really do see and feel your dilemma.

I reckon you'll just end up hanging on cos of the positive vibes you get now and then. So nice to have someone who is likeminded.

I hope she's right and it is very soon so you can get on with life either way.

Take it easy

Cmf x

[Guest_1584]

Haaa thank you my friend , nice hug.

Huh , yeah probably , God knows. lf the cases aren't till next yr though and still no us wellllll, with the way she's mostly been lately well. l can't feel anyone else but should something very special pop up sometime down the track , no guarantees.

Anyway, l'll roll along and see what happens. rx

[Guest_1584]

Ps , not that l can even think of someone else in reality it's just what if's , the mind, nor even be bothered with it either truth be told butttt, you know how these things go, things do happen.

rx