Relationship and family issues

Anything to do with managing relationships and family, including parenting, separation, loneliness, divorce, family and friendships.

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Chris_B PLEASE READ BEFORE POSTING: 3 important tips to get the most out of this section
  • replies: 0

Hi everyone, The Relationships & Family Issues section is one of the busiest here on our forums. It's also one of the areas where we find members can get themselves into trouble! Before posting here, take a deep breath and be mindful of the following... View more

Hi everyone, The Relationships & Family Issues section is one of the busiest here on our forums. It's also one of the areas where we find members can get themselves into trouble! Before posting here, take a deep breath and be mindful of the following 3 tips: 1. Do you really want to share this with the world? This is a public forum. Are you thinking of posting something that could identify you to a friend or family member? Once you've posted, you can't delete what you've written and we don't take posts down from here unless they've broken one of our community rules. This is because our members spend a lot of time composing replies, and there is a much wider audience that gets a lot out of reading what has been written. It's not fair to ask the community for support, then ask to have it removed once you've read it so others can't also benefit. Use discretion when posting here - think about the level of detail you are sharing, and think also about who might know you are posting here. Also, please keep it clean: this is an all ages forum and explicit discussions about sexual problems are not permitted. Threads and posts of this nature will be removed and your account placed on a moderation hold. 2. What do you want to get out of posting here? Relationship and family issues are stressful. Members sometimes post here seeking advice about a relationship that has broken down, but find themselves getting upset when they don't agree with the response they get. This is a peer support forum, meaning we are not mental health professionals. We are people of all ages and backgrounds, with a wide range of life experiences. While we aim for our discussions to be conducted respectfully, people here will respond with the truth as they see it, from their own experiences and perspectives. We are not here to take sides. Offence is almost never intentional, but it can be sometimes taken. The advice you will see here is not intended to be a substitute for professional counselling. 3. What other support do you have? Most people posting on our forums (about any issue) use this space as a supplement to other supports. This forum is not and cannot be a substitute for offline supports, but it is often a good place to start the ball rolling and find the courage for seeking help. If you are relying solely on an internet forum to resolve your relationship or family issues, you are likely to be disappointed. Check out the Healthy Homes section of our Healthy Families website for further information and resources.

All discussions

Smiley_face Lonely
  • replies: 5

Hi I have a 3 month old baby and no friends. The only people I no r family/ inlaws. I use to have friends but one by one we fell out. i have a husband who is always to busy to spend time with me. He runs his own business and is always working. He get... View more

Hi I have a 3 month old baby and no friends. The only people I no r family/ inlaws. I use to have friends but one by one we fell out. i have a husband who is always to busy to spend time with me. He runs his own business and is always working. He gets 4 weeks off every year over xmas but this year his family came and spent the whole 4 weeks so he was busy with them all holidays and can't spend one on one time with me, he sleeps in a seperate room at night because the baby crys and doesn't want to be disturbed i feel lonely and this makes me sad im trying to b a good sport but I can't help but feel this way. Him and his relatives planned an activity I can not participate in because I have the baby I expressed to him that this made me feel left out but the choice is his if he wants to do this activity or not. He said he wants to do it but if I don't want him to he won't. I just want him to want to spend time with me because he prefers it. Not because I ask him to.

Nickname_F206AE54-1EC8-48 My son's best mate died by suicide
  • replies: 6

hello i just signed up..today was one of the hardest days of my life as a mum as my sons best mate was laid to rest at 19 years of age....suicide

hello i just signed up..today was one of the hardest days of my life as a mum as my sons best mate was laid to rest at 19 years of age....suicide

Cherries Pushed my support network away for good
  • replies: 4

i have been suffering from what i assume is depression for the last two/three years due to past family and relationship incidents. i have lost a lot of my social network due to no motivation to socialise, my family have issues of their own to deal wi... View more

i have been suffering from what i assume is depression for the last two/three years due to past family and relationship incidents. i have lost a lot of my social network due to no motivation to socialise, my family have issues of their own to deal with so i'm on my own here. i had recently met someone very genuine, honest and caring. However as much as i tried to let them in i couldn't do it and had pushed them away multiple times. This person has understood my issues and perservered until yesterday when i guess the final straw was drawn. i'm 100% sure all hope is gone as their last words were harsh but fair and for me to never contact them again. they will never know how much i cared about them and how much i want and need their support. i don't know what to do, i haven't stopped crying over this. do i let them go and lie in my bed or do i try and contact them again? any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Ambrosia Empty friends/empty family = alone
  • replies: 10

Hi. Well, it's prob been a yr since I posted - but hey, if any time of yr could make you feel bad, it's Xmas! How many genuine friends do people have? Really? I'm 41 and my circle is incredibly small. My husband is FANTASTIC and my best friend I have... View more

Hi. Well, it's prob been a yr since I posted - but hey, if any time of yr could make you feel bad, it's Xmas! How many genuine friends do people have? Really? I'm 41 and my circle is incredibly small. My husband is FANTASTIC and my best friend I have some old friends that's very hard to see (I work I hospitality and the hrs are non-conducive to maintaining relationships). my family life is a mess. My mother died 7 yrs ago, my father left me for another woman (he has cancer but we can't see him because she won't let us), I'm estranged from my sister and my brother only appears when he needs too. One so-called best friend (of almost 30 yrs), stopped talking to me because we had a falling out (I believe many mature people would see it for what it was and move on - although deep down I believe it's because she's so miserable that my happy marriage and successes is pushing to the forefront the misery she's trying to deny). My other so-called best friend, of 20 yrs or so, became so unsupportive and rude and belittling, I'm guessing over the same thing), that I called it quits last year. so now it's me, my husband, a handful of old workmates that I struggle to see (I've lost some along the way - the girl I was bridesmaid for moved to tassie and forgot to tell me!) and my beloved cat. i work a lot but I adore the commerardery of my workplace that I don't want to give it up because then I'm worried I would lose those friends too (I know I will . Staff range from 19-47 yo so I know a lot of it is friends due to location). I just don't want to be alone . I love spending time by myself but I can't handle loneliness. so how many friends do adults have? What's common? I'm proud I cleared false friends out of my life over the years but I don't want to be alone . I won't cope. That's why I work so much and have gone back to Uni. To fill a hole where my love and trust disappeared to.

Angelstar My Partners Mother is crazy
  • replies: 4

I honestly don't know what to do about this lady. My future in law. My partner and I are quite serious about our relationship, but his mother is convinced that I'm a good digger or to that affect. She's recently divorced last year and has a relations... View more

I honestly don't know what to do about this lady. My future in law. My partner and I are quite serious about our relationship, but his mother is convinced that I'm a good digger or to that affect. She's recently divorced last year and has a relationship with a man who everytime I see him, he has a drink in hand or smells of alcohol and smoke, she has triplet boys at home as well as my partner who still lives at home. She harasses him about him spending money all The time, even though that money is money he has earned himself and spends on things he wants, she complains that I don't spend as much money on him, so why should he be using his on me? I'm a student currently looking for work and he has a job. Just yesterday she kicked him out of her house, which he pays rent and board money to live at, and told him to do what he wants, with seemingly no trigger at why she was angry at all. She was apparently upset that all I bought my partner for his birthday was a key ring, but we also went out on a date and dinner earlier that week, as well as Christmas, I didn't give him a present, because we went on a trip together for New Years. Now, she's harassing him with messages that I'm no good for him, and that I'm just using him and one day he'll see I'm no good at all. She never talks to me, and ignores my attempts at conversation. I really don't know how to clear her misconceptions of me, if she won't even talk to me. For the time being my partner is staying with me and friends, but we're both scared to death of her because she's saying things like she'll call the police for assault and tresspassing when we went to gather his belongings. She had the aura of someone who would kill, were honestly scared she would try to. how do you even deal with someone is a reasonable way, when they have no reason?

DianaPrince Depressed. Love her and left her.
  • replies: 10

This is what my partner did. After a period of withdrawing from me he told me loves me more than anything or anyone.. but that he can't commit to a relationship and can't be with me. A few weeks later he said he said he regretted breaking up with me.... View more

This is what my partner did. After a period of withdrawing from me he told me loves me more than anything or anyone.. but that he can't commit to a relationship and can't be with me. A few weeks later he said he said he regretted breaking up with me... and that he still loves me... but doesn't want his depression to hurt me. It's almost beautiful in a way... after some time talking again he again withdrew and this new years told me he wants me to let go. I can't. I love him. I will always love him. I will never abandon him. I don't understand why he left if he loves me so? Why push away the one person who loves you the most... the one person who cares and can really support you?

Boatbuilder82 Trying to move on from ex wife but still love her
  • replies: 8

I'm 34 I've recently separated from my wife of 11 years I have 4 beautiful daughters. my problem is she moved on from our marriage 12 months before we split and while she is now dating a new bloke I am still mourning the demise of our marriage. i wil... View more

I'm 34 I've recently separated from my wife of 11 years I have 4 beautiful daughters. my problem is she moved on from our marriage 12 months before we split and while she is now dating a new bloke I am still mourning the demise of our marriage. i will admit I have depression and was never the easiest person to live with but I was seeking help for myself in the way of antidepressants and counselling and when I became apparent we were having marital difficulties we sought counselling once and could never get her to commit to more sessions i chose to re invent my self by having weight loss surgery and be a better person for her and the kids but on the eve of my operation she told me our marriage was over and she didn't want me to go through with it if it was for her i convinced myself it was still the right decision for me so I still went through with it and now I'm 27 kilos lighter and more depressed than ever because I still love her she is moving away, taking the kids away and has a new love i am absolutely gutted don't know where to turn. Blaming myself is an hourly occurrence and everyone in my family and hers is fence sitting except for my father who hates her guts and if I vent to him he will make waves feel so alone not fair to dump on my kids cause they are young and having a hard enough time already fear I will never come back from this

Friendzle Insecure new relationship
  • replies: 5

I'm recently out of a long term relationship where my ex was emotionally abusive and cheated on me multiple times. The break up was quite traumatic and drawn out, but I've finally been able to move on. I'm 1 month into a new relationship with a FIFO ... View more

I'm recently out of a long term relationship where my ex was emotionally abusive and cheated on me multiple times. The break up was quite traumatic and drawn out, but I've finally been able to move on. I'm 1 month into a new relationship with a FIFO guy, which is a totally different dynamic than what I'm used to. We had a great connection while he was here, but since he's been gone the conversation has turned very sexual. I worry that we're building a relationship on just sex. I really like him, and I want things to work out. He's really sweet and takes me on nice dates, but the shift in our dialogue makes me worry that its just sex. I know I'm still dealing with my own deamons and battling the insecuirty that goes hand in hand with being emotionally and physically cheated on, so are my concerns genuine? Or just insecure thoughts I should dismiss?

Frankie79 How to forgive and move forward
  • replies: 4

I caught my partner chatting to other girls online. We do t live together and have a long distance relationship. I'm having trouble forgiving and forgetting and moving forward. I feel like it's consuming me. Any advice?

I caught my partner chatting to other girls online. We do t live together and have a long distance relationship. I'm having trouble forgiving and forgetting and moving forward. I feel like it's consuming me. Any advice?

lightmyway Dating with a disability
  • replies: 3

Hi, I’m 34 diagnosed with mild intellectual disability and schizoaffective disorder. After being diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder I have since been working for a disability enterprise (sheltered workshop) on DSP. I found open employment stress... View more

Hi, I’m 34 diagnosed with mild intellectual disability and schizoaffective disorder. After being diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder I have since been working for a disability enterprise (sheltered workshop) on DSP. I found open employment stressful as it was with my I.D. Before I got sick with this mental illness I was married to a Div1 Nurse who was slim, attractive and she had a Master’s degree. It wasn’t long after we married I started getting episodes of psychosis it really scared her and was affecting her work and study. She was in the process of starting nurse to paramedic Pathway course. I was shattered when she called it off as we were planning on kids too. The schizoaffective disorder has since gone into remission as I take medication religiously and see a clinical psychologist as well as a psychiatrist who is now reducing my medication. Because the mental illness is well under control I have ventured onto online dating. I am on oasis active as it’s free. Although I consider myself attractive I must be realistic in my standards because of disabilities. The women I’m seeking and send contact requests to I feel are within my socio-economic level. I’m constantly getting rejections by women who are single mums on parenting payments or carers payments, overweight and like me have little education. When they take a bit of time to know me they end up rejecting me because either because I find it difficult to carry a conversation or they say I can’t be trusted with their kids. I don’t understand why I was marriage material to an attractive medical professional, but dismissed as inadequate, inferior and not up to standards to overweight women who smoke on Centrelink benefits? I feel we are the same socio status but they see themselves as too good for me. I feel so sad, worthless and about to give up.