Since the decease of my parents I have had to take on the responsibility of being independent. I have recently moved from living with my auntie to my older brothers house. The environment I was in at my aunties was unreasonable for me to live in and I believed the close relationship I have with my brother would mean we could get along living together. I prepared myself for the cons aswell as the pros. However since moving I have just completely crashed. At home I live with my brother and his girlfriend. They are often fighting due to her bipolar and other problems. My brother is always out doing his own thing or caring for his girlfriend and barely gives me any attention. We will talk here and there and maybe watch a movie together but at the end of the day we're living very separate lives. I feel like I haven't moved in with my brother, I feel as though i've just boarded a room with random housemates. Me and my brother have fought a few times since moving in, which is normal but I don't handle anger well and I usually just burst into tears. I look up to my brother and I consider everything he says. He can be a very angry , selfish person and not realise that he actually says some really hurtful things to me. I understand I'm getting used to my new place and the way things work here but I feel completely alone in all of it. Independence is something someone should have to experience when transitioning from adolescence to adulthood, not when a girl's just turned 16. Doing my own washing, cooking my own food, doctors appointments, working, shopping, transport, school everything I do I do on my own and it has been quite overwhelming. I know this is just something I will have to get used to, like any independent. I want to work on my relationship with my brother so I can feel content and know he's there when he needs me. Not this feeling of going to bed in an empty house... Yet I don't know how to build on things without getting in the way too much and making things awkward. I understand everyone needs alone space too..
