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BeyondBlue Hey there - read this to see what this section is all about
  • replies: 0

Hello and welcome This is the Relationships and Family section where members can talk about what is happening in their lives and the people they live with. We know that who we live with can make a big impact on our wellbeing, both in a good way or a ... View more

Hello and welcome This is the Relationships and Family section where members can talk about what is happening in their lives and the people they live with. We know that who we live with can make a big impact on our wellbeing, both in a good way or a negative way. As always, we want to hear your story and how it impacts you and encourage everyone to support each other with kindness. There are a few things to consider when posting in this section so we can all get the most out of it: Everyone’s situation is unique. We all do our best to share what is important in our story but we can never share it all. Let’s be mindful we can’t know all of everyone’s story. Anonymous but public. These posts are available to everyone and while the moderation team will keep it anonymous, its still up for everyone to read. Have a think about what you want to share to get the best support for you. Please stay safe. This space is an amazing way to seek support from others who might understand what you are going through. We want to hear how you are going and what is happening for you. Please also consider 1800RESPECT if you don’t feel safe or 000 if you are in danger right now. You deserve to be safe. Thank you again for joining this conversation, your contributions are worthy and important to us here. Beyond Blue

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Joseph1992 I dont understand myself
  • replies: 4

My entire life has been filled with nothing but pain. My so called family could watch me burn. I dont understand where ive gone wrong. I have this ability to wear peoples shoes And feel their pain. I allways want the best and i only ever show i care ... View more

My entire life has been filled with nothing but pain. My so called family could watch me burn. I dont understand where ive gone wrong. I have this ability to wear peoples shoes And feel their pain. I allways want the best and i only ever show i care to no avail. I dont want anyone to suffer thats all i ever do. Yet im left complexed at why i just get left out,lied too,manipulated,used,abused I suffer with anxiety and depression. Ive allways been single spent every night alone try to myself it will all be ok. But when does it stop im soo tired my thoughts run rampent my anger untethered, and all i feel is contempt for myself. I dont want to change who i am, i love who i am and what ive become yet.. i hate myself

Bee1998 Worried My Boyfriend Likes His Co-worker
  • replies: 5

I am extremely paranoid that there is something going on between my boyfriend and a co-worker at his work. A few months ago, I found texts between the two of them, and I saw it as flirting (especially from her end). I actually ended up messaging the ... View more

I am extremely paranoid that there is something going on between my boyfriend and a co-worker at his work. A few months ago, I found texts between the two of them, and I saw it as flirting (especially from her end). I actually ended up messaging the girl to ask if anything is going on between the two of them. The message I sent was extremely kind and non-threatening, and I wasn’t accusing anyone of anything, I was just asking ... instead of replying to me, she told the other females in the office at her work, and I got a phone call from one of them. The lady told me “we want nothing to do with your relationship”. At the time I didn’t think anything of this. Then, a few weeks later, I spoke to a friend about the situation, and she opened up my eyes to the fact that it was suspicious that the girl I messaged didn’t respond to me. Is she hiding something? Does she feel threatened because I know something might be going on? Why didn’t she just reply to my message, instead of humiliating me by telling her co-workers?.... this really made me think that something could possibly be going on between her and my boyfriend. Mans the weird part is, since I messaged her, she hasn’t sent my boyfriend anymore messages. So maybe she’s keeping it on the down-low and just talking to him at work so I don’t find out. The worst part is, some days while at work, he stays in the office (with her) , instead of going out on the field with the guys. This makes me extremely distressed, as I can’t see or know what goes on while they’re both there together. does anyone have any thoughts or advice on this? It would be very appreciated

Nothappyuni The love of my life, 25 years together and she has an affair
  • replies: 5

There is nothing anyone can say that will dull anything. I have left the family home, my kids and my cheating partner, though she says I can stay and live as a border in the house I worked for. Since moving out I have had time to speak to people, and... View more

There is nothing anyone can say that will dull anything. I have left the family home, my kids and my cheating partner, though she says I can stay and live as a border in the house I worked for. Since moving out I have had time to speak to people, and confirmed that she had an affair with a work colleague. He was younger and carefree, he had sex with anything that moved, including my wife. Since that happened (over 18months ago) my partner has not looked me in the eyes, I kid you not, she cannot look into my eyes. It has been like living with a 'life vampire', sucking everything out of me, I swear the world has gone black and white, I can't even tase anything. It makes no difference if you study psychology, it doesn't help with the depression. The person who you worshipped and placed above all things had sex, again and again, and again- with another man. I worked all those years to provide and care for a family, we owned everything and wanted for nothing.. well, nothing but sex with another man. It takes two, I know, but so many people are thoughtless of the damage they do to confused people going through midlife/menopause and the domino effect on the family. Get your rocks off with someones wife, it's all good. Yeah! Now one of my kids is on drugs (and my wife buys him alcohol every weekend), the other left home. And I have nothing to live for, and the guy from the fling is states away, he found a younger woman lived with her, then cheated on her and is single again- doing someone else's wife. This rant has done nothing for me, and I know no one will have anything helpful to say. Such is life! What is it worth???

CrazyGecko89 Not sure what to do.
  • replies: 2

So I got a message from a friend recently that i haven't seen or heard in years asking if I'm free to chat as she was in a really dark place. I oblige and found out she left a 5 year relationship with a control freak and moved back with family nearby... View more

So I got a message from a friend recently that i haven't seen or heard in years asking if I'm free to chat as she was in a really dark place. I oblige and found out she left a 5 year relationship with a control freak and moved back with family nearby. Her depression and anxiety was rather severe so I ended doing a few all nighters making sure she's alright and thankfully things are slowly on the mend and now we've gone from talking to hanging out where she's staying with future plans to visit places together but now the problems start popping up. Her sister is a big attention seeker so when I visit the jealousy causes arguments to flare up between the two and get nasty to the point that i have to leave which upsets the friend I'm trying to help and reconnecting with so I don't know what to do exactly there. The second is that during the relationship she had a child so there's the ongoing custody with the ex but she does get visitation. Now she's been dropping subtle hints about introducing me to her child and asking if it's ok to bring him along to our planned outings. This feels like a big thing to ask as I'm not a parent myself and not really comfortable being seen as a new dad by the child or other people. Any advice to these issues or did I accidentally dig myself into a bad spot?

UnlikelySituation 13 years of narcissistic abuse from wife
  • replies: 9

Hi everyone, It's taken me almost 14 years, however I found out that I've been emotionally abused by my wife for all this time. Things have gotten worse and I really want to get out. The problem is I have no money, I have a chronic illness and have t... View more

Hi everyone, It's taken me almost 14 years, however I found out that I've been emotionally abused by my wife for all this time. Things have gotten worse and I really want to get out. The problem is I have no money, I have a chronic illness and have two young kids. I've tried to see help from a psychologist however they just advised me to get couples counselling and see a lawyer. I really don't want to mess up anything by not preparing or saying the wrong thing to my wife as I don't want to lose my house and kids. It's been an extremely difficult past few months and got to a stage where I didn't even want to live. Please help.

ams019 Can't stand hearing about my new niece
  • replies: 4

My brother's wife gave birth yesterday, and I can't handle seeing the new pictures, and dread having to have the 'congratulations' conversations. The truth is, even though I get on well with my brother and don't have any issues in our relationship, I... View more

My brother's wife gave birth yesterday, and I can't handle seeing the new pictures, and dread having to have the 'congratulations' conversations. The truth is, even though I get on well with my brother and don't have any issues in our relationship, I don't want to see them or hear about how great their life is going. I feel like such a failure in comparison, and it really hurts that yet again, I am being left behind. I don't feel like I have it in me to keep fighting through all the rubbish.

Holi Ignoring his boys
  • replies: 1

Hi guys my ex pretty much has nothing to do with our boys.He has a older son from his first marriage who has 4 kids now and he has spent the last three Christmas with him in a other state.what hurts the most is our son has just been diagnosed with au... View more

Hi guys my ex pretty much has nothing to do with our boys.He has a older son from his first marriage who has 4 kids now and he has spent the last three Christmas with him in a other state.what hurts the most is our son has just been diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder 3 months ago and he hasn't ask once what's happening or how he is absolutely nothing.Our son is heartbroken he doesn't say it but I know.And my ex has sent me a email saying the most horrible things about the boys that I thought a father would never say it's just so cruel.Its like a pattern he did this to his Older son at basically the same age.feeling sad angry heartbroken

Tony1111 I need friends
  • replies: 5

Hi im tony 33 i have anxiety and depression im on medication for ive been thro some bad times I was arrested and sent to prison for somthing i didint do. Ive lost my job my wife has left me and is stoping me from see my daughter . I have no friends o... View more

Hi im tony 33 i have anxiety and depression im on medication for ive been thro some bad times I was arrested and sent to prison for somthing i didint do. Ive lost my job my wife has left me and is stoping me from see my daughter . I have no friends or family i dont get out much im bankrupt and cant get loans I dont know wat to do or were to go my life is destroyed

2904 My Boyfriend Hates My Parents
  • replies: 1

My boyfriend and I have been together for 7 years and he is very supportive. Recently he has told me that he hates my parents and doesn’t want to be involved with them in any way. They are very protective and they just want to help but my boyfriend t... View more

My boyfriend and I have been together for 7 years and he is very supportive. Recently he has told me that he hates my parents and doesn’t want to be involved with them in any way. They are very protective and they just want to help but my boyfriend thinks that they think we are receiving charity from them and we can’t do anything ourselves. He doesn’t want me to disown my family but he doesn’t want to be a part of their lives either. I don’t know what to do. I have suggested talking to my parents about it to see if we can come to a conclusion but I don’t even know what to say to them

zerofootprint should I buy a cat before or after my mother dies?
  • replies: 3

background 48y male living alone with only one family contact my birth mother who is not ill but i worry about her coughing and this bush file smoke had been very bad and still skies not clear reason for thinking about getting a cat i see them as nar... View more

background 48y male living alone with only one family contact my birth mother who is not ill but i worry about her coughing and this bush file smoke had been very bad and still skies not clear reason for thinking about getting a cat i see them as narcissistic which should remind me of my mother what is wrong with me psychiatrist handed me his card with the word schizotypal written on the back my file is currently being held at the hospital and i take my tablets question though is fairly important to me as my little dog who replaced my last dog is current 10 and i had already decided no more dogs i know a cat wont replace conversation that i have with my mum but i can look into its eyes and go through the motions of talking to it without getting negative reaction i sometimes pray that she will outlive me so i wont feel the loss like i once did when my dad passed away years ago i cant give more than that here