Trauma from childhood resurfacing

[riddle95]

Hi world. 

I feel like I'm really struggling lately with old trauma resurfacing. I haven't been able to sleep the past few nights because I just get blasted with memories. I can feel it physically and I've started having random dreams that are variations of the trauma or just stressful in general. I'm just finding it hard to deal with and I feel like I have no one to talk to. 

[mmMekitty]

Hello riddle95

I'm glad you have reached out to us today.

I understand very well how tumultuous a time it can be when memories & dreams related to trauma happen. It can feel disturbing, distressing & so upsetting & so difficult to cope with on your own.

Unfortunately, we can't stop dreaming. In fact dreaming is a necessary part of sleep. It sure would be nice to not have those dreams you've had. Try to remember the things in your dreams are you making an attempt to process the trauma & all the feelings around that. Maybe write them down, maybe make a picture to begin to express what happened & how you feel about it.

Before going to bed, I usually suggest writing down whatecer is on your mind, get it out there, & then also have some music, or an audiobook playing to focus your mind on as you go to sleep. I like my audiobook to be still playing if I wake in the middle of the night, too.

Also, if you have not yet spoken to anyone, think about talking to someone you trust, if you know someone like that or talk to your GP & see about getting someone to help you learn how to cope with the effects of the trauma.

You might also like to call BB Counsellors or use the Chat Online (number & links below at the bottom of this page), 

There are (sadly) many people who have experienced trauma & have PTSD, so you are definitely not alone.

These forums are for you, so don't hesitate to talk here as much as you like.

Hugzies

mmMekitty

[riddle95]

Thank you for your kind words. 

I fear that I have engaged in activities recently that have acted as a trigger. I don't want to stop doing these fun things though because they are important to me. I just wish there wasn't such a heavy darkside attached to it. 

I'm at a point where I feel like one trigger has triggered other triggers and so it's getting overwhelming. There is so much for my mind to process with work, house chores, exercise, eating healthy, friends and family. Gah - too much. 

[divine_inner_goddess]

Hi riddle95, 

Oh gosh, I can really empathise with you. Nightmares and distressing dreams are so awful and distressing. And I really get it that it becomes so overwhelming. 

I have had a pretty rough time this year with nightmares and stressful dreams as well. It was impacting everything. I was struggling to get through a day, I was crying a lot, and becoming more and more anxious and stressed and wound up like a spring. Especially just before bed time because I was paranoid about having another nightmare. It became intolerable. I couldn't function. In the end, I saw my psychiatrist and got some medication to help. I know meMekitty said that you can't stop the dreams. But, actually there are medications that can help. We are not allowed to mention specific medications or doses on the forum. But your GP should know of meds that can help, or refer you to a psychiatrist. If it helps me to function and to cope with everyday life, then I believe it is worth it. Everyone is different though, so you have to find what works for you.  

However, I suppose the nightmares/dreams are telling you that there is some unresolved trauma. And the more you suppress it, the more it pops up in some other way.....  I hope you have support? Seeing a GP is a good first step. And perhaps a referral to a psychologist and/or psychiatrist. 

look after yourself, 

dig