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Chris_B Welcome to the Multicultural Experiences section
  • replies: 0

Hi everyone, Welcome to the Multicultural Experiences section, a sub-forum within the wider beyondblue forum community. beyondblue acknowledges and respects the diversity of communities across Australia, including Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islande... View more

Hi everyone, Welcome to the Multicultural Experiences section, a sub-forum within the wider beyondblue forum community. beyondblue acknowledges and respects the diversity of communities across Australia, including Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people as the First Australians. beyondblue also recognises the complexities of identity and that people may identify with more than one community. Depression, anxiety and suicide can affect any of us at any time – regardless of our culture or background. We also know that a range of factors can make it harder for people in some communities to seek and access support. This section is for members born overseas, are the children of parents born overseas, have a language other than English as your primary language, or come from a family with mixed cultural heritage. Please be aware that posts in this forum may contain discussions of suicide, self-harm and/or traumatic life events. As per our community rules, please be mindful when posting about the level of detail you share on these topics as it can be upsetting for other members. We look forward to hearing your stories. Become a Multicultural Correspondent Are you from a culturally and linguistically diverse (CALD) background? Are you interested in being a regular contributor to this section? We are seeking members who will actively participate in discussions and start up new threads on topics of interest to CALD communities (6-10 quality posts per week). Please get in touch with our team to discuss.

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MisterM How to handle racism and abuse in the family
  • replies: 9

Hey all, My niece recently revealed to her parents that she has been seeing a guy for over a year now. She didn't want to tell them because of her dad's and to some extent her mum's racist beliefs. Her boyfriend is of a different race which her paren... View more

Hey all, My niece recently revealed to her parents that she has been seeing a guy for over a year now. She didn't want to tell them because of her dad's and to some extent her mum's racist beliefs. Her boyfriend is of a different race which her parents cannot accept. Her dad was so furious she kept it from them for so long that he verbally abused her, calling her names of a sexual nature which I do not want to repeat here as it may lead to my post not being published. He told me what he called her yesterday as he called me to tell me she has a boyfriend. Anyways, I saw my niece today and when I asked how she is going she started crying, she's very upset and cannot understand why her parents won't accept someone of a different race. My sister keeps saying to my niece that her boyfriend is using her for sex even though she has not met him. From what my niece tells me he seems like a very nice and caring young man. They met at high school. My niece is 2 months shy of turning 18 yet her parents say she is too young and has TAFE to worry about. I was furious at this, I regret not pulling my brother in law up on the phone about the verbal abuse, specifically the one of a sexual nature. I asked my sister to call me after work and I told her that her and my brother in law are wrong and that they are overreacting. My brother in law did not want me coming over as he is crying and all upset and hurt at being lied to. Today I told my niece I am there for her and see nothing wrong with her boyfriend and told her I understand why she hid her relationship for so long. She choked back tears because she wants to be open with her parents but feels like she cannot due to the racism and that her dad won't accept someone of a different race into his house. I am just concerned my sister and brother in law will think I am overstepping the line as it is their daughter. I just don't want my niece to end up suffering mental health issues because of this. Her dad calls her stupid, dumb and worthless and says she won't amount to nothing. I told my sister on the phone this is very damaging and why I developed mental issues because of how my mum did the same to me. Am I doing the right thing here, am I overstepping? I handled it the best I could. I cannot sit idle and let this slide, I'd be complicit otherwise. My niece is a good person who is mature for her age, I don't want to see her dad destroy her. Thanks in advance.

LostInAustralia New Immigrant Feeling Lost and Alone
  • replies: 11

Hi, I don't usually frequent these kinds of forums, but I am at a loss about what to do next. I am a long term expat who has arrived with my Australian husband over a year ago. While in our former postings it took me a while to settle in, make friend... View more

Hi, I don't usually frequent these kinds of forums, but I am at a loss about what to do next. I am a long term expat who has arrived with my Australian husband over a year ago. While in our former postings it took me a while to settle in, make friends, and feel like I belong, things have been taking a lot longer here. I haven't been able to make the network of friends I would have done in other places, in spite of finding work, joining clubs and classes, trying meetup, reaching out to random people at cafes... my usual tactics don't seem to be working. People are just too busy, or not interested in acquiring new friends, or I can't talk to them about interests in common, no one seems to have a background like me, and if they do, I am not finding these people. Where are they? I suppose it doesn't help that before my husband and I were in the same situation, but now he has fallen back into his old social groups and hobby (which I don't share). His friends are nice, but not the people I would call up on the phone. He seems to be oblivious to my struggle, I am sure he is not, but I feel like he is living his life and has forgotten what it used to be like to not have a network. I have come to a point where I am wondering what the point of being here is aside from my husband, who I am crazy about and when he is here everything does go a bit better. But he travels about 2 weeks of every month, so I am left to my own devices. I have gotten tired of going to Meetups and reaching out to people with no result, the few friends I have are from my home country for the most part but to be honest I don't really click with them. This is the first time, having lived in 4 countries, that I haven't been able to find a "tribe" and a reason to exist apart from my love for my husband. I would appreciate any advice, bearing in mind that I have tried all the usual stuff to "get a life" in Australia because I am at a loss as to what I am doing wrong. This is really affecting how I feel about myself and my ability to reach out, it all just seems pointless. I am usually very good at this, what am I doing wrong?! Thanks...