Abuse in other cultures

[white knight]

We recently had a thread on this forum whereby the husband (poster) is being controlled and physically slapped by his wife.

Judging by the broken English of the poster it is fairly certain he is a newcomer to Australia. The thread has been answered fully and appropriately i.e. condemning abuse if any sort, yet the question has been asked "is such abuse common in other countries and more accepted."

Tony WK

[Donte]

Hello Tony,

I haven’t seen the original thread. Just read yours now. From what I know working in the field, one in three victims of domestic violence in Australia are male.

I am not connected with my country of origin for over four decades and was very young when I migrated, so I truly wouldn’t know what’s happening there.

Very interesting question. Would be good to hear from others.

[Hayfa]

Hi Tony,

This is a very good question, in my previous work in research I can tell you that the literature supports evidence that abuse is more common in some other countries and is culturally sanctioned.
It should be remembered that abuse can include psychological as well as physical. Psychological abuse is not only verbal abuse but it can mean such things as financially starving a spouse to the point of removing and/or controlling finances.

It should also be remembered that the culture and environments of some countries have lead to such circumstances of psychological abuse for example, countries enveloped in war and political turmoil that affect living conditions will cause stress and depression which in turn, spouses will exhibit violent behaviours toward their partners/families.

There are many other social determinants that will affect a person's mental health which can trigger violent behaviour.
One of the biggest reasons why violence in these countries is more prevalent is because there isn't much legal protection or rights to the victims, policy in this area is lacking and literary research on the subject is scarce because victims are reluctant to speak out or seek help, and unfortunately if they migrate to places like Australia they continue to be reluctant to seek help.

Hayfa

[white knight]

Hi Hayfa

It begs the question "what can be done to reduce/eliminate abuse in Australia where the culture of it continues when they migrate here"?

I think, abuse is abuse. Media advertising is likely the most effective method no matter the country of origin, including our indigenous. Other areas that could be targeted are- religious leaders and shopping centres where there is a high population of migrants. Such leaflets in various languages.

Tony WK

[Donte]

Hi Hayfa,

Thank you for sharing your knowledge around this topic. I haven't had any exposure to this and always assumed that the rates would be the same universally as human nature is the same everywhere. But, after reading your post, it made me realize that indeed, some cultures may experience higher rates of violence due to war, poverty, woman's position in society etc.

It would be good if services such as Beyondblue did outreach in various areas where non-English speaking populations reside and provide information in the languages of the people. Allocation of funding needs to be given of course to development of culturally and linguistically diverse materials and resources, bilingual workers, community education etc.

With 46% of our population been born overseas or having at least one parent born overseas and 78.6% of them in non-English speaking countries, one would assume that an organisation like Beyondblue would be allocating a lot of resources to reach these vulnerable and disadvantaged groups.

[white knight]

Hi Donte

I'm confused. Domestic violence I assume isn't caused by wars. I'm talking about the traditional inter family violence. I'm asking as I don't know what to do in such a situation as an observer.

A few weeks ago I visited a Melbourne suburb in a market. A mother, clearly a migrant or child of a migrant slapped her 2 year old child on the face for misbehaving. Normally, for the sake of the child I'd intervene in that I would chastise the mother for the slap on a delicate part of the childs body, the face.? But I hesitated

I'm wondering if that act could be a common act in other parts of the world? I haven't seen it here with such young children.

What do you think Donte, in your experience are there countries whereby it is common and therefore accepted that children are treated like this? I worry for the mental health of children. What should we do as observers? If its common then the problem could be hard to change among that new Australian group.

Tony WK

[Donte]

Hello Tony,

Have you read ‘The Slap’? It covers precisely this topic. It’s a book by Christos Tsiolkas. The setting is an Aussie bbq where various family and friends get impacted by the slap that someone gives across the face of a child. Each chapter is the name of a person attending the bbq and explores their background, personality and values, and depicts the impact of such a small, unplanned, reactive act that affects everyone in different ways. SBS was showing it as a series long time ago.

Many parents from all cultures slap their children. I don’t know if any particular cultural group does it more than others. There are people in every cultural group who condemn this practice, even if it is traditionally accepted method of punishment.

Domestic violence refers to intimate partners. Familial violence refers to various family members. Child abuse is viewed differently under the eyes of the law.

Domestic violence is not caused by wars. Stress in family relationships can be caused by external circumstances though like unemployment, illness, wars, homelessness etc. If that stress results in the breakdown of communication and subsequent violence I’m not aware. I’d say it must be a contributing factor though.

I usually mind my own business and don’t interfere unless I feel the well-being or safety of the person (including little persons) is affected. I have no right to tell someone how to parent or discipline their child no matter their cultural background. But I have called the police on a couple of occasions where I believed that the law was broken.

[white knight]

Hi Donte

No, haven't read that book. Have only read about 3 books in my life due to inability to concentrate.

I will watch out for that SBS show.

I agree with your last paragraph also. I'm very sensitive about the face slap although I didn't get them as a child other kids did of many backgrounds. I just think its unnecessary with mental harm potential.

Thanks for that clarity.

Tony WK

[Donte]

I grew up being slapped across the face by my mother - a violent, bad-tempered woman who failed to abort me so I grew up being blamed for being born and received lots of emotional, physical abuse from her and neglect from my father.

I had a blood nose throughout my primary school years (nose is broken as a result) and still suffer not only mentally but also from sinus and migraines and head clusters directly linked to the broken nose.

So I understand very well what you are saying. 🙂