(Trigger warning) PTSD after being stabbed
Jase, I far from like the situation that you are in but I have to say i like your previous post "over it". I like it in the fact that you thought about getting onto the forum and posting. That is an outlet. Rather than keep it in, you decided to let it out and that is great.
I hope today has been a better day for you and the waves are good and the wind off shore.
Hi Mark /Croix
No surf as per usual, cant be bothered even getting into the water i just feel like im existing rather than living how long does one expect me to continue on with no help with these flashbacks i am human being i have feelings, i cant ever remember treating anyone like this, i try my best to help others and right now everyone is busy and i have nothing to do other than think how f....... up my life has been, i just wish i would not wake up each time i fall to sleep, not good to be thinking like this still dont no why they saved my life thats what i mean when i say im over it .dont worry im not going to do anything stupid and kill myself however the thought crosses my mind very often i just wish i would not wake up sleep forever.
Happy new year
I can see you are doing a tough time, though I think I know you a bit now and I'm sure tough enough to pull through.
I had a hard time of it too, though I was never physically injured. I (still) get drawn back into timesin my past where things went wrong or were just plain horrible. Over the years I've come up with several ways of dealing with them.
It took me a LOT of practice. One thing I did/do when I can feel I'm on the downward slope is to try to think back to a time when I was happy, and trying to remember absolutely everything I can about it.
One example is I remember a train trip I took to visit my grandparents when I was a lad. This can occupy my mind for quite some time and leave me in a better place than when I started. I try to remember every thing from the color of the carriages to .. well you get the idea.
Do you have a memory like that, one where the world was good, one you might remember with pleasure?
Jase, they saved your life because you were well worth saving. Never forget that. Even though your mind is doing it hard at the moment, you are worth it.
How is your mate travelling at the moment? Recovering well?
If you need to think of something positive, just think of the child who gets one of your rainbows. They sound so awesome and making a young one smile.
Cheers mate and hopefully the wave gods smile upon you shortly.
Hi Mark and Croix
Would just like to say a big thank you for all the reassuring words and your patience with me i really do hope you all have a great new year , i no its not funny but i am going to lose it if i dont take a different approach to this lack off duty off care so im just going to laugh about it instead .and give up on getting help, dsp, counseling not even bothering with victims off crime compensation see if this approach makes life any easier for me as 2017 i want to put this all behind me as if it never happened can only try gone on for to long tonight is new years eve and i would like to enjoy the new year
Thanks for being there for me and understanding what im going through
All the best for the new year
Hi Mark and Croix
I just finished of a rainbow for my good friends daughter so as she can give it to one off her friends for the new year left out the names so she can write those in herself very rewarding doing these for the kids and gives me piece off mind for short time like i sde in last post i just got to try and laugh about the last 13 months it is what it is im gona try my best to not let it get the better off me and try some relaxation techniques rather than keeping busy going to try and see if i can watch some tv movie without my mind drifting off elsewhere
Happy new year
Ps might have found a place to stay for couple weeks. i slept in a proper bed mattress last night so comfortable
You sound on the up right now, and you're right, doing things for kids is great - I'm sure your friend's daughter will have a lovely time giving the rainbow to her friend. Not only keeping occupied but a great result
Can't say I'm sorry to see you out of the wind in the ute and into a building for a change. Be nice to sleep on a mattress and catch a movie on tv
Take care- have a good new year's eve