Not coping after disclosure

[startingnew]

Please help me. Im really struggling.

last night i disclosed something that ive kept with me for 2 years now. Im already struggling with ptsd anxiety and depression but the event that i disclosed also comes under ptsd.

I rang a hotline and the first time in 2 years ive spoken about it and im so embarrassed and ashamed. I hate myself and blame myelf for it. And im terriffied! !

[Ggrand]

Hello Little Butterfly,

Im sorry you’re struggling so hard and are thinking the way you are.. Please try hard not to think like that..You’re strong sweet I know you’ll get past this phase..

I know that it probably doesn’t seem to feel very comforting at the moment for you because I’m not sitting there with you in real life, I wish I could and you’re probably feeling alone I’m so sorry sweetheart I wish I was there to give you a warm comforting hug..

As our beautiful Deebi said, Don’t give up...you are a survivor...Your strong beautiful and a huge inspiration to many here that read...

You have had so many hard times but darling you always pull through, be determined to do the same now...please.

So true Deebi...

We Do love you little butterfly and both need and want you in our lives..Breath beautiful little butterfly, take out out for you darling to just sit somewhere quietly and breath..

love and hugs..💚🤗..

Grandy..

[startingnew]

thank you my friends

it is just so hard to keep going all the time. every day is a battle. one of the things it is hard to have dreams when things get taken away too.

i dont know how much or where else to draw any strength from. i dont even know when the last time i took my meds either, havent been able to afford them either as they are pretty expensive.

life is so stressful and tiring. i feel so hopeless

[Cybil101]

Hey. Please don’t give up. You are worthy and you matter. I hope you are getting the support you need. With the right support it can get better.

[Ggrand]

Hello Little Butterfly,

Have you told your dr about your meds, not taking them because of the expense, My dr dupplied me with some once when I couldn’t afford, they have usually samples in their office, also maybe you can make an account up at your usual chemist, just a few ideas darling, I think your not doing so well because your not taking your meds...can you please try this another possibility is to go into the salvos or vinnies, our vinnies help with things like that..

Please don’t loose sight of your dreams, keep focused on them...Maybe it’s time to spread your wings lovely and maybe try to get an outside job that way more money and maybe you could save for a little place you can rent , I’m not sure how that will work out, and please if I’ve said wrong I am so sorry...It just sounds that you are doing so much at home more then your able to handle, it’s just not fair on your mh...you need to concerntrate on you first...

You are definitely not hopeless, with all you do their, no way your struggling and Beasty lies and it is lying to you now..please believe in yourself and keep those dreams of yours alive..it doesn’t matter how long it takes to accomplish your dreams, just don’t ever let them go ever...please...

”Keep your dreams alive. Understand to achieve anything Requires faith and belief in yourself, Vision, hard work, determination and dedication. Remember all things are possible for those who believe”.......Gail Devers...Please believe in yourself as we all do..

Love and hugs beautiful little butterfly..

Grandy..

[Peppermintbach]

Darling Butterfly Wings (and a wave to all),

I’m sitting next to you, side by side, and offering gentle comfort...

You sound so exhausted...I think it’s really disheartening when you feel that you don’t have a firm hold on anything, and that your dreams seem to be slipping through your fingers...I feel for you, lovely...

Warm big sis hugs and much love

”Dusk till dawn”

Pepper xoxox

[startingnew]

Hi everyone

Im sorry i 'ran' things were just to much, between my pop, family issues, finances, lack of sleep and how ive been lately it was just to much to cope with. I have started SH again which isnt something i would go back to and now its back like an addiction and is the first thing that comes to mind now 😞

the past few nights i have been sleeping but last night was heaps worse. . i had some pretty awful dreams, 2 of which i couldnt wake up from and ended up in a sweat , the other 2 were only minor and kinda weird. ive barely slept at all and now im worried about tonight and what that might bring.

so so tired, along with that ive woken up quite dizzy, headachy toothachy, hot flushes and more off colour as well as weird cramping and muscle aches which is probably explained by the reproductive issues and being late yet again ive started taking my meds since the 27th as i sold some items to make sure i could get them so itll last me around 2 weeks so can get them on my next payday as well.

ill have to ring my gp today and see when i can get in i think. Im not to sure what else to say, the kids to back tomorrow which will be good. i also finished my rainbow blanket and have started another one. my pops asked me to make him one so ive ordered some more yarn plus the hook size needed so will start that when that arrives.

i feel quite shattered about what happened the other day and it feels like my future is on hold for the next few yrs at least almost like my future is already mapped out

thank you so much for your support as always xoxo

[demonblaster]

Dear SLD 🤗 Feel this hug with warmth and love darling

So much to deal with eh sweetheart. You're incredible Starts you keep going no matter what.

I'm realky pleased you're back on the meds I hope it all improves for you darlin.

Good on you being honest. Look at the SH as a temporary set back hun not an ongoing one. You've been doing so well and you'll get back on track you're determined enough and got tremendous strength you'll get past this too honey.

Nice going with your blanket I was wondering how you're going with them. How lovely pop wanting one.

Here for you Starts darling with your many friends 🤗🤝🦋😚

[Peppermintbach]

Hi darling Butterfly Wings (and a wave to all),

What a horrible time you’ve been having....your troubles just keep piling up. I feel for you...gentle hugs...

Something major clearly happened the other day. The part that saddens me the most is hearing that your life might be hold on for the next few years...

There’s obviously no obligation or pressure, but if ever feel like emotionally unloading about it, you know we are here for you...

Great work finishing your rainbow blanket. It sounds gorgeous!

Sitting with you quietly, and offering love, warmth and comfort...

”Dusk till dawn”

Pepper xoxox

[Peppermintbach]

Darling Butterfly Wings (and a wave to all,

I hope it’s okay if I visit to keep you company for a bit. Please don’t feel you need to reply to me if you’re not feeling up to it...I understand if you’re struggling with words or just don’t feel up to writing.

I have been thinking about you and hoping you’re getting some moments to yourself. I know how much stress and pressure you’re constantly under...gentle hugs...

I saw 4 blue butterflies the past couple of weeks. That’s pretty unusual. I don’t usually even see one blue butterfly in a month, let alone 4 in 2 weeks. It felt pretty special to me.

My favourite moment was when a blue butterfly appeared then seconds later, a white butterfly also flew into view. That made my day as the 2 butterflies made me think of us 🙂 I hope that little anecdote brings a smile to your face...

As always, much love

”Dusk till dawn”

Pepper xoxo

[Peppermintbach]

Darling Little Wings (and a wave to all),

I have been thinking about you. I know maybe you’re not up to writing/talking or just don’t feel like sharing, and that’s okay. I just wanted to say hello and sit here for a bit...

If you ever need to talk, but seriously there’s no obligation or pressure, we are here. Gently holding you up and listening...

Much love to you...

”dusk till dawn”

Pepper xoxox

P.S. I have more butterfly sightings to report...mostly blue ones lately, which is odd as I rarely see them (normally), though I mentioned that elsewhere. I did see a lovely white butterfly yesterday, which made me think of you 🙂