Introducing mmMekitty

[mmMekitty]

I am mmMekitty, named for my cat, (my avatar), who lived 7 years. It has been five or so years since, but I still miss her. Mekitty an I had a simpler relationship than any I have had with people.

The photo is the one I to retrieved after my hard drive crashed. She had wandered off, was away for six days, when she turned up again in the middle of the night. I cried with relief. This was the photo I used for her Lost Cat poster I put up around the neighbourhood at the time.

As for me, I cannot see the detail of the photo nearly as well as I did then, and then my sight was poor. I am now using text-to-speech software, zooming on my pc, voice over. Since I find this stuff difficult, I get really frustrated.

I used to keep all my emotions in check, so much so, I thought and said I did not have any feelings or reactions to anything. That changed and I could not deny the existence of my emotions. It was a terrifying time. What was happening to me? I was falling apart and all this unidentifiable stuff was pouring out.

I have had to learn so much since I began seeing the Psychiatrist I saw back then (1993 - 95). From learning I had to put words to the experiences, name, own, accept them. Still uncomfortable. I beat up on myself too much, I know.

I used to do things I can no longer do to my own satisfaction. I still sing, but not like I used to. I cannot paint like I did. I cannot use pen and paper to write, so have managed to adapt to keyboard. That is something. I have been working on being more sociable, less isolated, but last year, when COVID-19 retrictions required face masks be worn, I found I could not - which is what brings me here.

I have had to curtail so much of what I had been doing. I am feeling the isolation now. How ironic! I resisted even thinking I needed anybody, then I try to have some friends, join a writers' group, get help with things like housework and shopping, going to places for fun and entertainment, only to have to withdraw again because I cannot wear a mask. It bites, like a scorpion.

I will make a thread, now I found the place to click to create one! I think my problem was with how I have my desktop appearance. It looks like any ordinary link, hiding below another, for creating a feed link. Now I know.

I suppose I will get around to talking more about myself. I will need to be careful about how involved I become, so please, don't expect me to pop up everywhere. I would burn out if I did that.

(Purring) mmMekitty

[Croix]

Dear All~

First off you can see my 'Gone Fishing' avatar has been replaced by my normal hansom self. It looks like the last avatar a person submitted but was NOT to be adopted popped up in this reincarnation of the Forum

Now you can all have fun:) I"m looking forward to your Easter pic MK.

I think from the pic and description of MK's Bronion reminds me very much of a Triffid, let's hope it does not grow a flexible stinger on top

Croix

[mmMekitty]

Hello Paws & ER & everyone,

I'd never lay claim to being a gardener, or farmer. If I had lived when or where I had to be self-sufficiant I would have been in dire trouble quick smart!

Living somewhere else, with a better place for growing things, or maybe an all-year-round sunny windowsill, I'd love to try to learn more, to have some of those veg that I like (which can be so expensive sometimes), growing, & fresh herbs to pick, & yeah, try to have some chives, onions & garlic, too, ... I'd like raised garden beds, so I wouldn't have to bend or kneal down, too.... & now I'd need to label everything, maybe using Braille, so I would know it's a plant & not a weed.... 

My father grew some things sometimes. The best, I thought, were the capsicums, fresh from the bush. I could eat them like people eat apples: crunch, crunch!

Hoppy long weekend, everybody

Hugzies

mmMekitty

PS About the little onions - I age them. 

[mmMekitty]

Hello Croix! Somehow your post has turned up after I last posted ... no matter, though... no stingers grew on Bronion, & there was no sign that it could get up & walk around, either.

I am happy to see you have re-uploaded your Walrus with Clams picture. 

I'mstill trying to do another pic for this upcoming long weekend. maybe I'll just re-upload one from another long weekend.

*

Hmm, just had an idea: Triffids on Ice,.

Coming to an iceberg near you

- SOON!

Who said The Little Shop of Horrors was ridiculous? they never saw Triffids on Ice ... 

Hoppy LOng Weekend,

Hugzies

mmMekitty

[Croix]

Dear MK~

Yes growing things can give satisfaction and I"m not sure you would need braille labels, I'd expect you would be so aware of position shape smell and texture you would be able to identify them anyway. A raised be is an excellent idea.

I do think tour opening words to this thread , repeated on every page "I am mmMekitty, named for my cat, (my avatar)" as currently that would make your cat somewhat unusual, vegging the avatar you have up at present 🙂

"Triffids on ice" does not strike me as an endevour I"d like on my iceberg, a clambake would be much more ot my taste. 

I"m very pleased I"ll be able to use my 'Gone Fishing" avatar from now on, gust stopping posting to go on leave wihtout some visible indicator leaves me feeling I might be letting some down.

Croix

[mmMekitty]

Hi Croix,

When I firtjoined, I didn't realise I could change my avata.

I did want to explain why I chose the pic of a gorgeous red cat, & tell about Mekitty, which explains my username 'mmMekitty'.

I am always curious about what avatars people choose & why. If there is a story behind them, I'd love to know what it is. I don't want to pry, but there are times I just can't see well enough to see & have asked directly.

I'd even like to have asked people who aren't on BB anymore, what their avatar choice was about.

I had wanted to put up another avatar for Easter, but it would seem no one will see it until after Easter. Never mind... it is a cropped (to fit the circle) picture I'd used previously. I haven't been able to make a new pic quick enough.

Then I'll return Mekitty's pic for a while.

I appreciate your 'Gone Fishin'' avatar. Otherwise, I might start to worry, imagining all the clams have clamped onto you & keel hauled you right under your own iceberg, & it will be taking too long for you to return to the surface on the other side ... oh, woe, would that be soooo  long  & thanks for all the fish, no?

No, I would not like to think that.

*

As for identifying plants, even catagorising the weeds from the plants, I get confused. I think it would take me quite a while to remember which lants I've planted & where without having signs on them.

Hoppy Long Weekend with hugzies

mmMekitty

[Croix]

Dear MK, wiht a wave to all~

Yes the reasons people choose thier usernames and avatars are something I tend to think about before talking ot a peron, it often surprising what hints can be found. Have a look at

https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/welcome-and-orientation/what-s-my-name-avatar-mean/m-p/282597#M1...

Which quite a few people have used to explain their choices

Croix

[mmMekitty]

thanks Croix. I hadn't come across that thread.

Hugzies

mmMekitty

[mmMekitty]

Hello readers,

Although my internet connection is exceptionally slow again, (why I've not been around much last week), I wanted to come by here to talk about the tragedy of Saturday April 13, Sydney.

It's so very sad, so tragic, in my opinion, that such violence could have been perpetrated by a man who had mental illness, evidently for a long time, had recieved treatment, too, & yet ... I am so very sad for him, his family, the families of those whose lives were taken, injured, or who witnessed & thankful to are there to care for & support those affected. I am thankful especially, to the police officer who stepped up & did what was necessary to protect other lives. I'm thankful to those people who also acted to help & protect other people.

I can only imagine I would have been one who needed help.

I can also imagine how much worse the attack could have been. 

Yesterday is going to be one of those days that will stay long in my memory.

Thank you, BB. I needed somewhere to say at least this much. 

My thoughts bring to mind other thoughts about stigma, which I fear, the reporting of another person who has committed an awful crime, as having 'mental health issues', will only contribute to a popular opinion that people with mental health conditions, disorders, & illness are potentially if not actually violent.

I would like readers to remember, what we see & hear in the media does not represent the vast majority of people's lived experience of mental illness, disease, disorder, or health, however you call it.

I'd also like us to remember, we are not in possession of all the facts, history or background of this man, his family or how he was supported.

If you are someone who did know him, his family or other circumstances, then, yes, you will have more information than other people. My heart goes out to you, having to deal with what has happened, all the questions you & others will have. I really can't imagine how difficult this must be for you.  

For some people, they will have a long time recovering from the effects upon themselves & their lives. I wish you all the best, all the support you will need, & some way to understand how & why - though, I fear you might not get answers to those questions. I am so deeply sorry for all the loss ... 

mmMekitty

[Eagle Ray]

Dear MK,

Thank you for expressing those feelings and thoughts so well. I looked at the ABC website earlier today and saw this event has occurred. It is awful for everyone impacted. Yes, unfortunately there can be ongoing stigma around mental health, and as you say we may never know the full story. What I found moving was hearing how people supported, protected and cared for one another, such as the hairdresser keeping her shop open so vulnerable people had a place to rest until someone could pick them up, others giving shelter to people in their business when it was all happening and the man who held the guy back with the bollard. People really step up for one another in these situations.

Earlier I lit a candle because the power was out and although it’s back on now I’ve left the candle alight to remember those who lost their lives and those who have been injured and anyone impacted.

Hugs,

ER

[mmMekitty]

Hello ER, & thank you.

I turned on the ABC new at 7:05pm last night.

I felt unprepared for what I was hearing. After 15 or so minutes, they began replaying everything they had, (except for one video they said they ould not air because it was too confronting) Then again, & again, & I was curious to know just how long would ABC News 24 would replay the same video & interviews, & statements, & it seems rather much that they continued until 8:22 pm.

I very much dislike this kind of repetitive reporting. It seems to have a sort of cumulative effect on the mind & emotions. It reminded me of Sept 11 2001, when the reporting went on & on, into the next day, with the evermore detailed information..... it had got to be way too much then, & I feel it is getting too much for me now.

I feel, however, getting to know something about the victims is important, because this makes me feel I can honour them with my attention.

I'm not sure this is healthy ...  just the least I can do.

Hugzies

mmMekitty