Feeling desperate to make this stop

[Lilly99]

Hi there, this is my first post which is really scary. Anyway I am not good feeling really depressed and anxious . I have tried everything psychiatrists, psychologists. Mental health nurses. Medication , I even spent 4 weeks in mental hospital to have tms which obviously didn’t work . Anyway feeling like life isn’t worth living . I feel like I have had enough of this battle called life . No matter what I try nothing works . I couldn’t be more of a joke and a waste of space really what’s the point I am never going it get better . Do people ever truly get better?

[Jojo100]

Dear Lilly

Thanks for keeping in touch and it’s okay if you don’t know what to say. Sorry you are not feeling good.

Just remember we all care about you so much and our hearts go out to you and your family.

Our thoughts are with you and your sons xox

With love and a great big hug 🤗

YFF Jojo 🌻🕯

[Jojo100]

Dear Lilly

It’s just me again wishing you well and hoping your son is improving.

If the weather is nice could you go for a walk it always makes me feel better? Breathe in the fresh air.

I am having beautiful sunny weather atm and met up with Wayne for coffee and a walk which was really lovely.

Kindest thoughts xox

With love YFF Jojo 🌻🕯

[Saree_p]

Hi Lilly,

How are you doing lovely?

Thoughts are with you,

Saree

[Jojo100]

Dear Lilly

Hello just dropping by to see how you are today?

Hope you are managing to get some rest and are eating properly.

Thinking of you and sending you positive thoughts for you and your family.

With love YFF Jojo 🌻🤗🕯

[Jojo100]

Dear Lilly

Just wondering how you are going and how your son is now?

Please keep your spirits up and take good care of yourself.

You are in my thoughts and prayers xox

With love YFF Jojo 🌻🤗🕯

[Lilly99]

Dear Jojo,

My son is doing a little better. Will be home in a couple of weeks .

I am not doing very well. I blame myself fully for the past and the present. I have a Overwhelming urge to not be around anymore.

I know you will say not to blame myself but the reality is there isn’t anyone else to blame .

I have had enough of this life Jojo. I can’t see things ever changing .

Lilly 🌺

[Jojo100]

Dear Lilly

Please stay around Lilly.Your sons both need you. You are definitely not to blame for the past and the present is the result of a very unfortunate accident. Don’t pile more hurt onto yourself as you don’t deserve it. No amount of blaming is going to change things.

You are doing the absolute best you can and care more than most for your sons. You have a big heart as you always put your sons first. Please try being a little kinder to yourself.

Try not to beat yourself up or torture yourself with the what if’s because sometimes life just happens, be it good or bad and it’s no one’s fault.

You need to fight on Lilly, for yourself and for your sons. Are you due to see your GP again this week?

Thinking of you xox

With love YFF Jojo 🌻🤗🕯

[Lilly99]

Dear Jojo,

I haven’t made another appointment with the gp. There isn’t any point . I just can’t do this anymore

I feel so overwhelmed it’s like I can’t breathe .

Lilly 🌺

[Jojo100]

Dear Lilly

Just breathe love just breathe- slow deep breaths. You are stronger than you think. Don’t let the anxiety win.

Could you try visualising a safe or happy place in your mind to distract yourself. Perhaps remembering your time in Queenstown? Or anything nice really?

Thoughts are with you xox

With love YFF Jojo 🌻🤗🕯

[Lilly99]

Dear Jojo.

The thing is Jojo I strongly believe my children would be better off without me .

I have failed I am a failure . They need a different mum. One who is strong and resilient,

Lilly 🌺