My head feels like it's full

[Chris D]

As the heading says, i'm feeling flat. I want company but i have restrictive funds for this coming week. Family things are starting to get on top of me along with my own personal issues, i just feel i'm about to crack under pressure, i'm not sure just how much more of this i can take.

I'm ready to erupt like a volcano if this pressure doesn't lift. My head feels like it's full and take in anymore information,  it just isn't ready and either is my body i can feel it.

At the same time i need to look for work to earn money but i just don't feel ready my meds make me tired and so i'm yawning all the time it just feels so hard. I may come across like i'm going well but this thread i'm just letting all things come out into the open.

I have a family member that is starting to worry about an operation that is coming up shortly in the next wk or so, so they are a concern. i'm quite sensitive at the moment more than usual.

Fell like i'm in a real bind, between a rock and a hard place. I have a splitting headache at the moment so that isn't helping. I have an ex friend who still keeps having digs at me of something that happened at the start of the year in public places and isn't true. She verbally abused me and indirectly had a go at how my parents raised my 2 older sisters and myself.

Feel like i'm a bull stuck in a cage just ready to be let out.

Kind Regards

Chris

[Chris D]

On the way home coming from town i burst into tears. I was crying for the last 10min of my journey & when i got home i cried for another 5min.
This day has just slowly been getting worse for me, doesn't help when your home alone and my friends. are trying to deal with their own issues. I just want some company.
I feel so isolated alone. Please can anyone talk to me.
Kind Regards
Chris

[Guest_3712]

Hi Chris,

Gosh I am so sorry you are feeling this bad. I don't really know what I can say to make you feel better.

I know there will be heaps of people responding to you in no time but I just wanted you to know that I heard your cry .

Financial problems and dealing with all the issues that go with this awful disease can really bring you down. Hang in there Chris

Is there anyone you can have come over and keep you company?

Please be kind to yourself and if you feel worse please call one of the support lines

Stressless

[giggles]

hey Chris

I reckon sounds like a excellent time to call someone on here.

all those things are important issues but we only get to choice one thing at a time regardless of who we are and what we are going through.

Just looking at the local news is bursting with professions falling off the so called heaven path and thats guys and gals that supposedly have it all.

Maybe you should hit something not yourself or anyone else but just release some of the tension. Or dance.lol I am sure I could rattle of loads of things but it really is up to you  to put your signature on how you handle this.

I personally use the humour because once I see the funny side to stuff I come back to me and feel pretty ok.

Oh like today this is true story I heard once that spirits do not like sound so here I am thinking in that case all those that feel demons should clap. then of course I expanded that thought to imagining everyone going around clapping. 

Blow me down Chris when I was traveling on the road today a lady was walking and she was clapping as her exercise routine hands in front clap and hands in back.\ clap.

Well that was it for me I am happy today anyway so that just made me laugh with a ha.... look at that.... now if I can just twick that to making money I reckon I would be sweet. Its ok Chris I know I am the classic dreamer and thank heavens my thought do not come true cause we would all be doing some wierdo stuff for sure.

But happy I think. well hope.

ll the best and good luck.

[Jo3]

Hi Chris,

I am so sorry i haven't been here for you.  Is your girlfriend able to come over and spend some time with you?

You know we are all here for you, anytime. Chris, is there something you can do so your mind is at ease a bit?

Pls stay safe, you can fight this, I know you can, believe in yourself

Stay strong

Pls come back on if you want to chat

Jo

[Chris D]

Hi All,
Thankyou for replying and your kind supporting words.
Jo, my gf is in Qld on holidays comes back monday. Please don't b sorry Jo i know your going through a rough patch.
I will b safe Jo please rest assured that i will post tomorrow for you.
Thankyou for being such a nice friend and person to me along with everyone else so thankyou.
I just neef to talk to someone. Is anyone there?
Kind Regards
Chris

[Jo3]

Hi Chris

You must miss your gf.  Are things going good between the two of you? I really hope so because you deserve to be happy.

I'm not great at the moment, damn depression is getting to me again.  Chris, I will always be your friend, anytime you want to chat come on here.  Thanks for your kind words, i just try to be nice but sometimes I don't believe i am because of everything i am going through.  I must have been a bad person to go through what i am; to have suffered childhood sexual abuse not once but three times.

I'm sorry Chris, this is your post.  Pls take care

Chat again later.

Jo

[Chris D]

Hi Jo,
I do miss her, she lives an hr north of where i live. Things are gd btween us thanku Jo.
I can relate to u about the depression, this is the worst i hav felt since b4 xmas. Jo i know u are a nice person, what happened to u in the past is not your fault & never will b, don't let your or anyone else tell u otherwise.
Thankyou for being my friend, i will always be your friend. I appreciate your support & kind words.
Please don't b sorry Jo.
I can't explain why all of a sudden these last couple of days hav en't been gd dumb illness.
Kind Regards
Chris

[Chris D]

Getting more down by the day. I typed out a new thread eariler and it still hasn't been put up and yet other people have posted since and can be viewed. I don't get it, it wasn't an overly bad one nor did it have and foul language in it, so why hasn't it been put up to be viewed.

Makes me even more fustrated than what i already am. I'm so lost at what to do now in terms of my life. I just don't know anymore. 

Really starting to question my whole situation. I go to a support group to obviously support eachother and so during the wk we txt or call people and yet people don't want to hear my issues, i thought it was a support group obviously i was wrong again, just like 90% of the time i am wrong.

Don't deserve anything anymore. I have just written this to vent my fustration, no one has to reply. I'll be a loner just like the past.

Kind Regards

Chris

[Guest_3712]

Hi Chris,

 I have re- read your posts and I just wanted to reach out and let you know that I heard your anguish as i'm sure a lot of others have .

and as to why your other post hasn't gone up you can ask through the forum feedback in case it just got lost. 

it is so hard when you are feeling like this to make sense of anything. you get angry and frustrated at everything and it all balls up into this huge weight in your chest.

I am not trying to over simplify things but can you get out and go somewhere to let off steam. Do you run, or into the gym? Long drive, go the beach - I'm lucky to live close to the beach now and it is the only place I feel some peace.

Basically you need to put yourself into something where you can't take out your frustrations on yourself or others in a harmful way. Your headaches mustn't be helped by your tension and anxiety.

Chris I know I am not telling you anything you don't know, but just maybe forgotten for a minute. What are your other supports like? are you seeing any professionals?

Please don't think you have to face this alone- I have seen all the people here who respond to you.

Be Kind to yourself

Stressless