How do you cope day-to-day when it gets tough?

[Ravenclaw5]

I’ve had depression for about 10 years. It very much comes in cycles for me.

Sometimes I will be travelling pretty well and then it creeps back in. I often avoid it and don’t do much to help myself until it gets really bad and I end up being self-destructive. I don’t really have much family/friend support but I’ve always seen GPs/Pscyhologists/Psychiatrists. However, I’ve recently moved towns and haven’t yet connected with any health services.

I feel like I just go through cycles of counselling (which costs so much money) and I don’t really pick up any new strategies that actually make a difference/that I genuinely want to use. I stress about how much it costs when I don’t feel like they have given me any helpful strategies (although I do feel better talking to them).

Right now, I’m struggling to get through the day. I work in a job that is very people-oriented and requires me to be pretty aware and on-my-game. At the moment, I’m so anxious about completing daily tasks that I just can’t even start them. When I’m at work, my mind feels fuzzy and I struggle to communicate with people (which is the main part of my job). I just don’t want to be around anyone.

I kind of want to push through my symptoms of depression and anxiety because in the past I’ve given in and given up completely. I’ve quit many jobs and broken down at many different workplaces from getting to this point. I feel like I’m at breaking point in this job now too. I’m worried if I keep doing what I’m doing, I’ll break down at work and end up quitting in a moment of desperation. If I did leave, I don’t want it to be like that.

Also, it’s extremely difficult to get more than a day or two off work so I cant take any extended time off or anything to just reset (I don’t think time off would help me at all as this intensifies my anxiety).

Do I take one day off? Do I just keep pushing past the symptoms and try to not fall apart at work? Do I quit this job and try and find something less stressful, where I can have more flexibility to manage my mental health?

Does anyone have any strategies to stop yourself just completely falling apart when you just have to go to work/look after kids/etc? Do you just push through to get things done?

Im going and getting a referral to a psychologist this afternoon but I need immediate strategies.

[Kristofer]

Hi there.

it is hard sometimes isnt it!

I go through stages of good and not so good too.

Do you take medication for your depression?

Kris

[Suzie89]

Hi there,

your post resonated so much with me. I have the same kind of issues and like you, I get depressed in cycles. I become completely overwhelmed and have had a few mental breakdowns. I actually had one in work last week and feeling like I kind of made a fool of myself and tried to cover it up which is probably worse.

my strategies for getting through days like this, when I just want to run away (my job is also VERY people oriented) is I try to distract myself with the work I’m doing. I have also found it really helpful to let at least one person in work know that I’m feeling off and that can be really helpful. I don’t know if you have someone at work that you trust and could share this with but it might help you too.

Another strategy that a counsellor suggested for me was to have a written conversation with myself. With one hand write a question to the part of you that is feeling down. With the left hand, answer the question. It sounds pretty weird but I have actually found that it helps. Also taking to yourself as you would to another person is a good way too, we are way too hard on ourselves sometimes and need to give ourselves a break!

i hope this was some what helpful. ♥️

[Ravenclaw5]

I do take medication and have since the beginning. The GP said it would be okay for me to up my dosage so I’m going to try that and hopefully that helps me to not have as many overwhelming thoughts.

[Ravenclaw5]

It’s nice to know someone else feels similar! I should probably let people at work know I’m not doing well right now. Work is really supportive but I feel so guilty for being like this. No matter how many times people tell me not to be ashamed/guilty and tells me how much everyone needs mental health support, I still feel totally embarrassed and ashamed about talking about it openly......

[PamelaR]

Hi Ravenclaw and warm welcome to our forums

It's good to see you've found your way here and our community is getting in here to support you! Especially some of the newbies, Kristofer and Suzie. Awesome!

I know what you mean about work. I retired 2 years ago, however, things were always pretty stressful for me. I worked over 50 years and never knew I had anxiety and depression. It wasn't until the last 9 years that I was diagnosed. The best thing I did was talk to my boss about my 'breakdown'. I had to. She was so supportive and as time went on I was able to talk with other colleagues about my mental health. Everyone was there for me. It helped me survive the last few years of my working life.

There is no need for guilt about what's happening to you. I'm sure you realise this. Embarrassment and being ashamed are full on symptoms of mental health conditions. I've always found that having a good therapist to talk to helps me overcome these negative thoughts about myself. Are you seeing anyone?

There are many strategies for self help. Feel free to browse and join discussions on the forums. Do searches in our webpages if you want, e.g.

• Depression: Fight It or embrace It?
• Self Help tips for managing anxiety
• Depression and work

You're not alone Ravenclaw. Keep reaching out if and when you want to.

Kind regards

PamelaR

[PamelaR]

Hi Kris and warm welcome to our forums

Feel free to start your own thread if you want to. We're here to support everyone.

Kind regards

PamelaR

[PamelaR]

Hi Suzie89 and warm welcome to our forums

Thanks for giving support to Ravenclaw. Depression can be so difficult at times. Feel free to start your own thread if you want to.

Kind regards

PamelaR

[Guest_934]

Ravenclaw5 you are very brave and thanks for sharing. I am going through the same situation. Work and kids are tough. I have a toddler that my mum looks after and I'm fortunate for her support. Is there anyone that can help you? I work in publishing and my boss keeps making unrealistic deadlines that I can't meet. It stopped when I had a conversation with him that it was unfair what he was doing and he's lessened his micromanaging grip. Communication can really help. If you need time, take time to breathe and recharge and don't be afraid to ask for help from those around you.