Big Black Hole

roogirl · ‎09-03-2015

Hi there, I'm new to the forums. I have been battling depression for the past few months after a health scare. Now I'm finding that a lot of issues from my past have cropped up and I'm having to deal with my grief from a broken marriage 10 years ago. This is really hard for my as I've lived alone quite successfully for the past 10 years. I am getting professional help etc, but some days it's really hard going. I have a good family and good friends who support me, but at times I feel totally alone in this. My greatest thing is battling my stomach depression which wakes me up in the morning, it's like a gigantic knot in my stomach. I do breathing exercises and try to relax, but the only real way of releasing the knot is to cry, and then that can last for quite a while. Now to top it off, I,m having songs and music stuck in my head. Am I going crazy????? Any suggestions would be great. I'm 65 years old and didn't think I'd have to walk this road again.

roogirl · ‎17-03-2015

Hi InThePink,

Nice to hear from you. I'm glad you have found the library of great use to you and that you are feeling better. Yes, it's hard being on your own, just to be able to chat to someone at the end of the day about your/their day would be nice. That's the part I'm now struggling with. It sounds a bit crazy when I have been on my own for such a long time and coping well. I guess you can only bury things for so long before pandora's box eventually opens. Eventually time does heal the hurts and that's something to look forward too.

Continue to stay well, and thanks for the words of encouragement.

Big hugs to you also

Roogirl

roogirl · ‎17-03-2015

Hello there Mary,

Hope all is going well for you again after your recent hiccups. Life's a bit like that I find. Expect the unexpected.

Just a very quick update on the increase in my AD's. That's not going so great with the increase all at once, so my psych has got me to try and start on a smaller dose 3 times a day instead of twice a day. My system can only seem to tolerate small amounts of medicines anyway so this shouldn't be too big of a surprise for me. I now have an appt for Thurs with my psych and we will take it from there. Wish me luck!

Hoping to hear from you soon

Glenda

White_Rose · ‎21-03-2015

Hello Glenda

How did your psych appointment go? I hope your AD change is working a bit better. Such a nuisance when the body rebels. What were the results of the DNA code blood test? It would be great to be able to pinpoint which AD you could tolerate with out getting bad side effects.

How are you managing with your psych consultations? Do you find them helpful? While I enjoyed talking to my psych, and lets face it I can always talk, it took a while before I could grasp what he was on about. I dutifully did my homework and tried to change the way I thought. The my ADs were upped by my GP and suddenly the lights flashed on.

Talk about a revelation. The additional ADs seemed to give my brain a spring clean and all the work I had been doing with the psych slipped into place. Absolutely amazing. I felt quite euphoric which lasted several weeks. Even though this "high" has gone there is still an amazing change.

So all the years I battled against taking ADs were wasted. I could have felt like this a long time ago. Actually this is not correct. My current AD is fairly new on the market, I have much more help from my GP and my psych has worked hard with me. Or should I say my psych has made me work hard and the effort has paid off.

I look forward to hearing more about how you are going.

Mary

roogirl · ‎24-03-2015

Hi Mary,

Nice to hear from you as always. Sorry to be so long in replying, but I am going through a very tough time again now. Trying to up my ad's proved too much for my system and now I'm back to original dose and struggling. My stomach anxiety is very bad and pops up even at night now which it didn't do before. I am extremely emotional and keep crying constantly, except at work. My psych suggested a new ad last week, but because I have something big coming up at work, thought we delay this until end of April. However, I think it best we start, because I feel like I could shatter into a million pieces right now. I go to see the psych this morning, just as well I think. I've felt so bad a couple of times this week I've almost taken myself off to hospital. What a mess!!

My psych is just great and very supportive, so we will see what happens. My dna test proved I'm sensitive to meds and a further fuller report is expected. The ad my psych wants to put me on is only 2 years old and very good for people with sensitivities. However, it's not on the pbs, but the cost is not too bad.

I'm still struggling being by myself, and really frightened about starting to the new meds in case of side effects. I do have people I can stay with during this time if needed. I never used to be like this until I had my health scare late last year and taken off the meds abruptly which sent me and my system into a huge meltdown for about 6 weeks.

Anyway, thanks for the support and listening to me. Will let you know the outcome. Take care.

Love

Glenda

Neil_1 · ‎24-03-2015

Hi there RGG (Roo Girl Glenda)

I’m sorry to hear that you’ve been in a bad place of late; that’s always not nice to hear.

It is pleasing to hear though that you’ve got some professional assistance happening for yourself and I hope that your psyche appointment will be a beneficial one for you; hopefully to work through some of your most current issues and perhaps some ways to help yourself in dealing with these.

Maybe your psyche gave you advice in regard to taking this new ad – but for my approach it’d be to take it and just see what happens out of it. I mean, if you look at how you are at the moment or have been recently, things aren’t so flash – so try the new ad and see; if it gives off bad side effects, then simply stop it; but on the other side of the coin, it “may” just prove to be beneficial for you; which I hope it will.

Kind regards

Neil