Hi to anyone who reads this. This is my first time using any support
websites, so I’m a little unsure of what I should do. I just don’t feel
like I have any other options at this point. It’s been about a year and
a half since I got out of a toxic rel...
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Hi to anyone who reads this. This is my first time using any support
websites, so I’m a little unsure of what I should do. I just don’t feel
like I have any other options at this point. It’s been about a year and
a half since I got out of a toxic relationship, I was essentially
blackmailed into it. Long story short I’ve not had much experience with
women or relationships, so I was taken completely by surprise when
someone from my friend group confessed a romantic interest in me, though
it wasn’t mutual, after trying to let them down gently they began to
threaten to harm themselves. After talking to someone who I used to
believe was my best friend about it they said it was my fault for not
accepting. I felt I had no choice and agreed to try going out with her.
In the end I spent over half a year of them insulting me or ignoring me
after falsely claiming I had been disloyal, then threatening to end
their own life “because of me” I didn’t know what to do. I’m still
relatively young and inexperienced so I was terrified by the idea that I
could be held responsible for someone’s life and death. I now realise
this was not the case and what I was lead to believe. Ultimately I broke
up with them after spending months to build up the courage. Since we
were in the same friend group I was gradually phased out, after she
claimed I had dumped them for no reason. Most of the people in our group
knew how she treated me and threatened me but still ignored me and
insulted me until I decided it would be better to be left alone. To this
day I’ve never had the chance to tell my side of the story, because I
know it’s a small town and my few friends I’ve made in the past couple
of years might feel pressured to choose sides, and I don’t want that for
anyone. I just wish it felt like any of my problems were heard, or that
there was someone out there who cared about the way these things impact
me. It feels selfish of me to even write this on the internet. No matter
what I do I can’t help but feel my situation isn’t as bad as other
people’s, it feels like all I’m asking for is people’s pity because that
what I grew used to being told anytime I would ask for help. From my
mother, and from people I thought of as my closest friends, for years. I
feel like even though I’m nearly able to physically move away from all
of this it will continue to haunt me for years to come. As a young man,
I fear that I’ll spend the rest of my life feeling isolated just like I
do now.