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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Kapteinen My girlfriend is depressed and stuck - might leave the country
  • replies: 1

Hi all, I’m posting here as I’m all out of ideas or good conversation to have with my girlfriend. Me and my girlfriend are both from Norway, living in Australia. I moved here initially for uni, and as she is studying online she decided to move down w... View more

Hi all, I’m posting here as I’m all out of ideas or good conversation to have with my girlfriend. Me and my girlfriend are both from Norway, living in Australia. I moved here initially for uni, and as she is studying online she decided to move down with me. We are both due to move back home either July or November 2024 depending on my enrolment.Before leaving for Australia she did start a downwards curve as the uni she applied to and is now studying online at wasn’t what she expected. We were both living in Oslo (not together) and her uni wasn’t very social and it only had like 1 lecture a week, additionally most of her friends were living in different cities so already here she was feeling slightly alone from time to time. In the end she decided she might as well be uneasy in beautiful Australia with me than being alone in Norway. Long story short - her situation is rooted in her life in general, but moving here has worsened it at an alarming rate.Fast forward to now - we are both living here, but she has no friends, no physical uni to attend or go to, and she struggled a lot getting a job with no luck. For the past month or so she has gotten gradually worse waking up and going to bed depressed, we have a lot of nice moments together and laugh a lot but ultimately she is growing more and more frustrated with her situation. She feels a lack of purpose, which might be due to her having no passion or hobbies (still figuring her life out, fair enough) and that combined with little to no social life and no job or routines to keep her afloat she seems like she is drowning. Both me and her are trying to include her more in my social life, and to add some structure otherwise - like going to study at the library while I’m at uni, or to come study with me at my campus and such, along with social stuff with my friends from uni. However nothing feels quite "real", permanent or her own she says, and though it helps a little, it doesn’t to much in the grand scheme of her situation.Now she is unsure of whether or not she should stay and keep pushing through, leave me and travel the country, or go back home to Norway - and in that case whether or not we should do long distance for over a year before I get home or if she should break up with me. We did long distance for 6 months and it was excruciating, however we both love each other and both feel like once we land back in Norway we are good to go and start our lives together for real. I suggested we should pull through as a couple no matter what she does, but she feels desperate and anxious and feels she is choosing between different "evils" and that breaking up - making a serious change - is at least a change.I agree that SOMETHING needs to happen, be that getting a job and routines to give her purpose on a day to day basis, or move back home. However with her emotional and mental state fluctuating a lot, I suggested maybe getting professional help to sort out her head and help justify or solidify whatever decision she lands on.I am at a loss and I can tell I am getting more and more frustrated myself as her state just gets worse and I am running out of smart things to say about it. There is nothing I can currently do and I feel like I am watching the love of my life slowly crumble to bits.

luke95 Needing help.
  • replies: 3

Needing some advise and a bit of support.im 28 years old who holds a relatively stable job and stable household with my mum and grandma.12 months ago I starting dating again after splitting with my fiancé whom we were together for 6 years. We had bui... View more

Needing some advise and a bit of support.im 28 years old who holds a relatively stable job and stable household with my mum and grandma.12 months ago I starting dating again after splitting with my fiancé whom we were together for 6 years. We had built a house and both working stable jobs, to find out she was being deceitful and borderline cheating on me with a girl. Since then coming out as gay. We split, sold the house and left on amicable terms. I began dating a new girl 12 months ago who still had a close friendship with her ex-boyfriend. After many attempts to steer her from contact with her ex, she was still partially attached, lied and said some things to him that indicated she missed him. Since that point about 9 months ago there has been multiple attempts to forgive and build trust walls but happened on another 3 occasions of being lied too. I don’t have many friends and can come across as stubborn and it has started to really hurt my mental health over the last few months coming to this realisation. We have what you would call split but am attempting to still talk however her behaviour is extremely shady and never getting the full picture. I struggle lots with self confidence and am easily put down by the thought of being lied to or cheated on by her with all these “friends” she has. It has got to the point where I have began to self harm to feel some sort of feeling that isn’t that. I just want a friend. Someone that I can talk to about this. I have tried to start swimming and get into routine like making my bed and getting to work far earlier then I need to but my mind is in pieces trying to get better. It’s becoming very tough. All I need is a friend.

Red Wheelbarrow Back here again
  • replies: 4

I can't believe I feel like this again. Ive been living with depression of various intensity for almost all my adult life. Im 67. I had been feeling so good for nearly a year and now I can't even move from a chair without effort. Im trying all the tr... View more

I can't believe I feel like this again. Ive been living with depression of various intensity for almost all my adult life. Im 67. I had been feeling so good for nearly a year and now I can't even move from a chair without effort. Im trying all the tricks of the trade, meditation, living in the now, CBT, but I'm still under water. I worry about every thing I say or write in emails, frightened that I've upset people. It seems to be a lot of little things that build up. This time I think the final straw was my sister being admitted to hospital unable to walk and covered in a rash . She is an alcoholic. She was in hospital for over 4 weeks and was doing so well I thought I had my sister back. When she was discharged she started drinking again with her husband buying the alcohol. I thought it probable, but it completely flawed me. I am so angry with him and her. She has a son and grandchildren. I'm an alcoholic too but I have not had a drink for 21 years and it makes me mad that she was so clever and lovely and now she is a train wreck who can't string a sentence together. I know this isn't about them but it's about me. I am so sick of this roundabout. I'm wasting my life with this but can't stay happy. I have a loving husband and sons and 2 gorgeous granddaughters I should be jumping for joy every day. I hate this so much.

Richju That low, low energy
  • replies: 1

It started yesterday. I had had a better night's sleep than I had had for a long time but felt tired in the morning. My granddaughter visited but was happy to play with playdough and when my son picked her up I had lunch and returned to bed. I slept ... View more

It started yesterday. I had had a better night's sleep than I had had for a long time but felt tired in the morning. My granddaughter visited but was happy to play with playdough and when my son picked her up I had lunch and returned to bed. I slept till 4 p.m. but returned to bed at 7.30 p.m. and still felt tired this morning. So I've allowed myself the day in bed, sleeping till lunch time. I feel a bit more lively now and listening to my favourite music, also played a few games of scrabble on my mobile and I'm contemplating a shower in a while. I haven't had a depressive bout like this for years and previously I would force myself to exercise and do my housework so I just wanted to let everyone know how much I've grown. Grandpa Depression you're nearly dead.Ruchju

Halogrl Depression
  • replies: 1

I am soo badly depressed right now. I don’t know how to find the help

I am soo badly depressed right now. I don’t know how to find the help

Ash-H Depression and loneliness
  • replies: 2

So my psychiatrist diagnosed me with major depressive disorder (going through a major depressive episode post multiple stressors including a divorce)So much of the ‘treatment’ recommendations you find for MDD and dealing with a divorce and friendship... View more

So my psychiatrist diagnosed me with major depressive disorder (going through a major depressive episode post multiple stressors including a divorce)So much of the ‘treatment’ recommendations you find for MDD and dealing with a divorce and friendship breakdowns suggest leaning on friends and family and forging strong social connections. What that doesn’t take into account is:- it’s hard enough being social being neurodivergent- your friends and family don’t want to be around you when you’re severely depressed- it’s really hard to make new friends when you’re severely depressedIt just feels impossible

Daniel12 Help. I don’t know who I am supposed to be and feel lost
  • replies: 624

Hello there I don’t usually do anything like this but I wanted to see if anyone has any advice for me. I am a 25 yr old who on the surface should have everything under control as I have a good job, good family yet I increasingly feel like I don’t kno... View more

Hello there I don’t usually do anything like this but I wanted to see if anyone has any advice for me. I am a 25 yr old who on the surface should have everything under control as I have a good job, good family yet I increasingly feel like I don’t know what makes me who I am and often feel down and flat when trying to find answers. I know people have much more reason to be depressed than someone like myself but I just constantly felt flat and lost searching for how I am supposed to be and what makes me who I am. I have been trying to find a partner which has been the source of countless rejection which is all part of it I know but often I’m left feeling like I’m quite a boring person with nothing really that interesting to tell anyone and I am confused as to how to act I’m usually a quiet natured person but I feel this incredible pressure that I can’t be like that and I am confused as to where I am at with my life it is difficult for me to put into words I guess it’s just a lost type of feeling of what my place is and who I am and I thought at 25 I might have an idea of this I know my post hasn’t given a great deal to go off but if anyone has experienced similar at my age I’d be glad to hear what approach you took thanks

Alel Ashamed of having chemical imbalance
  • replies: 3

I got diagnosed with severe anxiety and depression. I'm also dealing with agoraphobia and emetophobia. Everytime I think about it I feel broken. I know when the medication works and I learn coping skills, everything is going to get better. But I can'... View more

I got diagnosed with severe anxiety and depression. I'm also dealing with agoraphobia and emetophobia. Everytime I think about it I feel broken. I know when the medication works and I learn coping skills, everything is going to get better. But I can't stop feeling ashamed of what I went through and having to take medication. The fact that I have a broken brain and need to do more to make sure I don't break compared to normal people is the worst. I feel so different and tired.

Speechless Feeling extremely distressed
  • replies: 1

I can’t stop it feeling so extremely upset crying and with constant anxiety attacks. I feel so so depressed and lost. Every few days I’m just okay and slightly able to function and then the other days I’m in so much emotional pain I cry all day and c... View more

I can’t stop it feeling so extremely upset crying and with constant anxiety attacks. I feel so so depressed and lost. Every few days I’m just okay and slightly able to function and then the other days I’m in so much emotional pain I cry all day and can’t function at all with anxiety attacks and it’s quite extreme. i will go to have a shower and end up not even being able to do that because I have crying attacks in the pit of my stomach and have to let it out with the anxiety attacks. It’s happens all day and even in the night when I’m not asleep or I have nightmares. I’ve been under so much pressure lately and we’ve sold my sanctuary, my home of 5 acres I’ve lived for 26 years which has a view and all the wild birds I feed. It’s always been my space, my grounding thru my illness since I was 14. My dad came and said he wanted to sell 3 months ago as fast as he could to invest in shares so he could get my sister a house(she’s a single mum). There was no negotiation or planning , just hurry up all winter trying to find a house to live. None had backyards and we’re all so close to people I was not used to and it gave me severe anxiety. We were under so much pressure from dad to find a place mum and I and him, there was only one place we looked at that was okay and I felt relaxed in and mum liked and it was a big block, a 70s house with a sea view and filled with lots of sheds and rainwater tanks.When your being forced to look at places that freak you out, and there isn’t much else you go with what is okay. So we’ve sold our acres but still living here just yet. It’s extremely hard, grieving this place with all it has and the apprehension of going to something not so great. This home has always helped my mental health and the one thing I had left that made me happy and content and now it’s going to be gone. It’s been my identity. Now I spiral out of control in my thinking. The backyard is so horrible there. It’s cement paths everywhere and sheds. It’s small and the soil is compacted clay. there’s no lawn.I will need to house my chickens there. I dreamt of making it a lawn and cottage garden with lots of native plants to attract native birds but it’s so much work and my parents prob wouldn’t help. I’d need a jackhammer to just get out all the hard concrete and to pull down sheds etc.And it’s all 70s make you want to throw up out the back and inside somewhat.And the unfamiliar feelings of this rundown 70s urban place.I feel heartbroken I’m used to open spaces and lawns