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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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WaterVeil Is this real?
  • replies: 3

Hi All, I'm new here. I've had depression and anxiety for as long as I can remember. When I'm well, I'm a zainy, intelligent, creative people person but I'm going through a particularly long patch of depression. I just really needed someone today but... View more

Hi All, I'm new here. I've had depression and anxiety for as long as I can remember. When I'm well, I'm a zainy, intelligent, creative people person but I'm going through a particularly long patch of depression. I just really needed someone today but discussing this is pretty exhausting, especially when it's in person, so I'm posting here instead. I'm tired of being sad. I'm tired of carrying it. I'm just so tired. The most difficult thing is that I feel like I have no options. It's not like there is anything tangible to point at to say, "See, look, there you go I'm actually sick". Half the time I think I'm just making it up and that, if I weren't so lazy, I could be happy and productive if I needed to. I feel like the people around me expect so much and that on the days where I'm sinking in it, which at the moment is most days, I just can't do it. I think they will think I'm incompetent, lazy or negligent. I want to have a big open wound to point at so I can say, "Look that's why I couldn't get that work done over the weekend" or "See that's why I couldn't pick up the phone when you called". So I guess my question to you all is. Is this real? Is it as tangible as having pneumonia or cancer or breaking a bone? and How do I keep going on with so much weight on my shoulders? In sincerity, WaterVeil

Polpetto Telling your partner about your depression
  • replies: 1

Hi everyone, Just recently joined the forum and would really appreciate some advice or have someone share with me their experience of telling their partner about their depression. A little about me: I am a male, 25 years old and ex-military. I was di... View more

Hi everyone, Just recently joined the forum and would really appreciate some advice or have someone share with me their experience of telling their partner about their depression. A little about me: I am a male, 25 years old and ex-military. I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder and Social Anxiety Disorder in 2015 following my return from an overseas deployment to the middle-east. Early this year I was diagnosed with ADHD sub-type inattentive following a neuropsychological assessment. As of today, my social anxiety disorder is quite well-managed thanks to some CBT that I received a few years ago however, my depression has been ongoing since 2015 and I have been on and off medication since then. As for my ADHD, I currently am trying to find the right treatment to alleviate my symptoms through medication. I'm on my 2nd trial of stimulant medication, but I am finding that it has been hard to find a middle ground between the benefit and negative symptoms associated with the stimulant medication. I am currently taking two medications daily, though to little effect towards controlling my symptoms. As time goes by I find that my depression, though sporadic, has become worse and the medication is doing little to help. I feel that quite soon I am going to find it very difficult to cope and will need more support, with the potential for admission to a mental health facility. This issue I have is that as a result, I will no longer be able to hide my condition from my partner. We've been together almost 3 years now and are engaged, we both want a future together and a family. I, however, can't come to terms with telling her about my depression. Regardless of how irrational it may seem, I feel that as a man I need to be strong and be able to carry this burden on my own. I feel like by telling my partner about my condition it will change the dynamic of our relationship, and that her perception of me will change from her provider and protector to someone she can't look towards for strength, that my reactions to an event from then on will be indicative of my condition. Once that has happened there will be no going back from it and I will be forever constrained to that persona. I figure that if anyone can give me some advice or share their experiences with telling their partner of their condition it may help me take the necessary step towards talking with her about it. Hope to hear from you guys soon. Regards, K

Jaysquizzle Not sure what’s wrong with me.
  • replies: 1

I’m 30 years old. I’ve been feeling weird and depressed since I was a little boy. I’ve never been able to make friends. I have a few who live far away from me, but I am so lonely in the small town I moved to for work. I cant talk to someone unless th... View more

I’m 30 years old. I’ve been feeling weird and depressed since I was a little boy. I’ve never been able to make friends. I have a few who live far away from me, but I am so lonely in the small town I moved to for work. I cant talk to someone unless they talk to me first, and even then I can’t look them in the eye. I have no social skills. I’ve never been interested in drinking or going to pubs, I feel too anxious in crowds. I don’t have many hobbies and have always worked myself hard at work since age 17. The men who work for me are in their sixties, so we have nothing in common. I cling to women and constantly feel petrified of being left alone. My current partner has cheated on me with three different men and I let her get away with it because I can not bare to come home to an empty house and then spend years alone here with my own thoughts.

Frogman78 Depressed feeling tired lonely scared and grieving at the same time feel free to reply my need a little bit of help I think
  • replies: 3

Hi home well just like to say that my lost my mum just over 2 weeks ago to bowel cancer and grieving in the bed depression has seen again as 6 months ago today I lost my partner which she was 32 and we have a little 4 year old together which my mothe... View more

Hi home well just like to say that my lost my mum just over 2 weeks ago to bowel cancer and grieving in the bed depression has seen again as 6 months ago today I lost my partner which she was 32 and we have a little 4 year old together which my mother-in-law and father in law look after as I'm a quadriplegic to top things off I don't know which way to turn like I said I'm tired and scared I'm lonely feeling worthless I don't know what to do don't know who to talk to my doctor says no I have to talk to someone maybe this is a first step of talking to someone I don't know but I just want things to be easier things are so hard at the moment really hard I just don't want to get out of bed I just don't want to do anything I don't want to go anywhere I don't want to talk to no one I don't want to see no one how do I fix this problem I will be sitting there and all the sudden just burst into tears for no reason and cry and cry and cry sometimes for an hour or two I don't think I can cry anymore I done up crying in the last few weeks to do me my lifetime am I doing the right thing I starting here that's what I don't know maybe you might have a response and an answer for me or even guidance that would be lovely well we'll see how things go from here talk to you soon guys please feel free to reply

Amber1991 Stuck again
  • replies: 2

Hi Everyone, just needing a place to vent. I’m 27 female from Australia. I work as a senior support worker and my work is always busy but I love it. I’m scared that I’m not going to get the promotion I have been working towards because I’ve been havi... View more

Hi Everyone, just needing a place to vent. I’m 27 female from Australia. I work as a senior support worker and my work is always busy but I love it. I’m scared that I’m not going to get the promotion I have been working towards because I’ve been having too many days off work. My boss hasn’t said anything to me about it yet but I know he will soon. Sometimes after the weekend I get in that much of a rut that I can’t muster up the motivation to go to work on Monday, and then that turns in to Tuesday, and then sometimes even Wednesday. I use health reasons as my excuse but it’s really because I can’t even imagine going to work when I feel like this. I get so nervous about what my boss will say when I text in sick that I turn my phone off all day. When I’m at work I’m an excellent employee and am well liked, no one would guess that I get so low outside of work. I’ve been self sabotaging by eating junk food, smoking too much weed and not exercising. I feel guilty because I haven’t been taking my dog for walks and she is putting on weight. I lost 20 kilos and was feeling great, now I’ve thrown all that down the drain and have completely turned my lifestyle around to what it used to be. I’ve recently put on 9 kilos and an feeling disgusted in myself and how I’m treating myself. I haven’t been in a relationship in over 3 years because I can’t imagine being in a relationship with someone. I’m too used to my current lifestyle and don’t like being around people when I get home from work. I also feel like I’m too fat and unattractive for anyone to want me. People tell me that I look fine and I’m being hard on myself but I feel like I’m huge and ugly. Sometimes I feel like I’m trapped in a prison and can’t leave the house. I stay on the lounge and don’t get up all day except for eating and going to the toilet. I’m supposed to be studying but I haven’t even started and it’s already halfway through the course. This makes it the 2nd time I will have failed the course because I’m unmotivated. It’s strange that I am such a good worker and am such a different person at work but I’m so scared of losing my job and the money I’ve gotten used to that I try my best at work but when I get in these moods my performance drops. I’ve been thinking about seeking therapy again but the thought of it is also exhausting.

blackflywonder My family makes me depressed but they are only trying to help
  • replies: 4

I am currently suffering depression and have suffered from it multiple times in the past. I've been trying to narrow down why I am depressed as the causes are hard to pinpoint this time. After seeing my phycologist today, I was home alone and I was s... View more

I am currently suffering depression and have suffered from it multiple times in the past. I've been trying to narrow down why I am depressed as the causes are hard to pinpoint this time. After seeing my phycologist today, I was home alone and I was starting to feel a bit better. As soon as my brother came home from school, followed by my parents, my mood dropped and I felt depressed again. Looking back on the past 3 months since I've gotten depressed, when my family try to assist me, they make me feel even more depressed and I just want to get away from them. I have such a good relationship with my family and would never want to upset them and vise versa. I am confused why my family make me feel worst when they honestly aren't doing anything wrong to upset me. I will start to feel a bit better when I am home alone but as soon as a family member comes home, I fall back down and into my shell without them even saying a word. Has anyone else felt this? Could it have something to do with me needing some personal space to work things out?

Lalaleelu Help re: Overcoming Depressive Patterns and Moving Forward :)
  • replies: 5

Hi all, Until recently I was a high-functioning depressive. I am 20 years old an was studying law at university and working as a paralegal. Unfortunately, because I was ignoring my own wellbeing I worked myself into a really bad state and decided to ... View more

Hi all, Until recently I was a high-functioning depressive. I am 20 years old an was studying law at university and working as a paralegal. Unfortunately, because I was ignoring my own wellbeing I worked myself into a really bad state and decided to discontinue work and study. When I no longer had work to do I began binge-eating every day. Now I have put on 20kg and feel pretty disgusting about myself. At this point I know I would like to try something new. I am interested in finding a part-time job and beginning to study nursing (it's something I have wanted to do since I was admitted to hospital for mental health reasons and the nurses were amazing). The only problem is I have lost all of my self-esteem and feel embarrassed to go in public looking the way I do now. It's really difficult because I want to take the steps to get better but am so down on myself that it's making it very hard. It's especially hard for me because I was recovering from an eating disorder when I began binge eating and it's really provoked a lot of negative thoughts. Does anyone have experience in overcoming this kind of situation or any tips on how to deal with this? I really want to move forward with my life, but find myself getting sucked back in to the same old patterns Thank you

Jakez1992 Lost and confused. Please help.
  • replies: 4

Hi all, looking for some help. I'm 4 months into a relationship with somebody and right from the start there have been issues which to this date have yet to be resolved. Apart from these issues, the relationship is great. My partners says they'll wor... View more

Hi all, looking for some help. I'm 4 months into a relationship with somebody and right from the start there have been issues which to this date have yet to be resolved. Apart from these issues, the relationship is great. My partners says they'll work on the issues but minimal effort is given, and its not much is changing at all and the effort is still at a minimum. I keep telling myself to be patient and they'll get better but as a result of these issues im constantly finding myself in a state of sadness and feeling worthless. My self esteem and confidence have taken a major hit and I often feel below rock bottom in life. The easiest way to explain it is that I feel like im in a big black hole and no matter how hard I try to get out, i cant escape. I feel these relationship issues are taking over my life as well as my thoughts, and a lot of the time it completely consumes my thoughts to the point where I struggle to focus on other tasks. Im either really tired or not tired at all and often feel like im not living my life at all. I feel like im just existing and all my energy is going into just surviving the day. I cant shake the feeling that this nightmare will never end and I feel like Ive lost so much of myself and im starting to hate the person im becoming. Im no longer the person I used to be; the person I was proud to be. I think this may be a case of depression but im not sure. Does anyone have any opinions or any advice on how to cope with all of these overwhelming feelings? It sometimes just feel like they're too much to handle and I dont know what to do anymore. It feels like it'll never end.

Mummytoo3 Not sure how to help depressed Husband
  • replies: 3

My husband has suffered from depression in the past but he had an encounter yesterday that has triggered his depression again. He’s an avid trail runner and yesterday while out training he encountered a group of teenagers that tried to attack him and... View more

My husband has suffered from depression in the past but he had an encounter yesterday that has triggered his depression again. He’s an avid trail runner and yesterday while out training he encountered a group of teenagers that tried to attack him and one managed to get a punch in, Lots of blood, massive cut inside his cheek and in quite some pain! While I’m so sad this has happened to him I’m struggling to know how to help him. He doesn’t want to talk about it, he may be embarrassed I’m sure. But I need him back, we have 3 small kids and I’m at the end of my rope, I’m parenting in my own here (including him). He’s currently locked himself in our room and just can’t be bothered with anything. am I not being compassionate enough? at what point does he just need to move on with life? are there ways for him to cope better? I don’t know if other people would respond in the same way?

blackwidow Feeling lost and worthless
  • replies: 2

Ive been unemployed for about a year now, and have been job searching but cannot seem to get a bite of anything! So i am a personal trainer but left my job as the rent was too high and wasnt making any money from it, as much as i loved it and it made... View more

Ive been unemployed for about a year now, and have been job searching but cannot seem to get a bite of anything! So i am a personal trainer but left my job as the rent was too high and wasnt making any money from it, as much as i loved it and it made me happy, i had to stop it. Since i quit, ive been back in a hole of depression. I got in a new relationship after ending one for 6 years, but i am being mistreated and used yet i cant break away because all that makes me happy is feeling comfort that i have somebody, even though i know i am being treated poorly. Im to weak to end it because illl feel even more alone. I my friends tell me they are there to talk to but when i tell them im lonely they dont make an effort to help. When my parents see me upset they just want me to be on medication and everything will be ok, but medications dont help relationships and finding jobs, and i strongly disagree with it as i was on it for 2 years and made it worse. So im stuck in a hole, i cant sleep, try to exercise but have no appite so i feel weak in the gym. Ive put on weight because of my relationship which is why i am hesitant to get back into personal training because i hate myself. I feel alone, i feel im not moving forward and im still living at home, all my family pity me and my boyfriend makes me feel like im a lazy idiot. Ive lost all confidence in myself and the only time i was happy was personal training, talking to new people everyday, but im stuck at home with no interaction and no money. I do art which is a strong passion of mine, but of course no jobs in that. Its a recipe for disaster and i have no idea what to do anymore.

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