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Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

Chris_B Are you looking to support someone else with depression? PLEASE READ before posting
  • replies: 1

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and f... View more

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and friends with a mental health condition It's full of threads from people who have family members and friends going through anxiety, depression or other related conditions. Have a read through the threads there, and feel free to take part in the discussions. Below are also some helpful beyondblue resources you might want to look through first as well: Supporting someone Have the conversation

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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DannyG Unemployed and volunteering
  • replies: 2

Hi all does anyone have any advice about volunteering? I’ve been unemployed for 4 months I get interviews but no job offers. Ive been trying for volunteer roles and I get no response. I call and leave messages or send emails - nothing. is anyone else... View more

Hi all does anyone have any advice about volunteering? I’ve been unemployed for 4 months I get interviews but no job offers. Ive been trying for volunteer roles and I get no response. I call and leave messages or send emails - nothing. is anyone else going through similar and feel like sharing their thoughts? Thanks:) D

Anon-12 I’m very lost
  • replies: 3

I’ve recently lost a family member extremely close to me, and had my partner walk out on me all within the span of two weeks. I’m broken, lost and scared. I’ve been extremely low before but never this low. I don’t know how to keep myself occupied, I ... View more

I’ve recently lost a family member extremely close to me, and had my partner walk out on me all within the span of two weeks. I’m broken, lost and scared. I’ve been extremely low before but never this low. I don’t know how to keep myself occupied, I have moved to a new town and don’t know anybody. I am alone and it’s taking its toll. is there anything I can do to keep myself busy and attempt to find a positive state of mind? My partner was extremely degrading and mentally abusive, to the point I was afraid to sleep in the same room to avoid being told how worthless I am. They constantly bragged about the attention they received from other people, and how much better they were off without me. When they left they were very heartless and that’s what pushed me down further. I am trying to grieve the loss of someone who is no longer on this earth, and the loss of someone who walked away. I don’t know which is worse. I gave more than I had in me to this person and I feel as though it was never enough. how do I get out of this horrible state of mind

IsThisIt_ What has my life come to
  • replies: 2

I dont know what to say, I have never posted before. Until recently I didnt know I was depressed, I just thought I was unlucky in life and a good person so thats why people use me. I thought eventually if I was a good person and worked hard that life... View more

I dont know what to say, I have never posted before. Until recently I didnt know I was depressed, I just thought I was unlucky in life and a good person so thats why people use me. I thought eventually if I was a good person and worked hard that life would work out for the best but now Im 35 and alone with a terrible life. My friends only reach out if i reach out first, I feel so alone. I now avoid functions because its awkward especially when i get asked "how have you been" what can I say? I have been shit and my life is over which will ruin the mood. Everyone wants you to be happy all the time. I went into real estate and was actually good at it but made the decision I wanted to get better and improve my career only to hit the wall of bad times over and over again. I see many people doing well who are horrible people and do unlawful things yet they have good lives and i have nothing trying to do the right thing. Had a "friend" offer me the world when his office went down hill and wanted my help while he was over seas to help the office, only to stuff me around and not offer me a job after I was there for 2 months. Now Im in a shit job doing labouring where the boss treats me like rubbish so mentally im drained. I have to accept it so i get a pay cheque as Im very poor now which makes me cry that Im such a disappointment that I have to put up with bad people. To add to it, my girlfriend just gave up on me because she couldnt see a happy like with me. She wanted the big dates and fun times yet I couldnt be that person all the time in a state like this. She just saw my bad luck and depression as excuses, maybe I should have opened up about my depression months ago but how do you start that conversation with someone that wants you to be happy? I just dont know where to go from here. My friend just reached out and I told him about work and the breakup but he just ran, no one likes the conversation so again, I am alone. I guess this is my life and I need to accept it, some people are not meant to be happy. But I dont know if this is the life I can accept, lucky I have my 2 dogs to keep me company so I have to stay on this path to provide for them. I just dont know what to do to be happy or if being happy is possible.. sorry for the rant guys, I just had to speak and could cry to myself any more

The_Quiet_Rambler Completely Alone and Friendless
  • replies: 7

I realised a couple years ago that I have no real friends. Every single person I considered a friend only ever talked to me when I approached them. Only ever contacted me when they wanted something. They often say they'd love to catch up but are conv... View more

I realised a couple years ago that I have no real friends. Every single person I considered a friend only ever talked to me when I approached them. Only ever contacted me when they wanted something. They often say they'd love to catch up but are conveniently indisposed (or didn't see my messages) when I'm in town ... I spiraled after a event involving someone who I thought was a real friend. And I realised after that I have no friends. I was so miserable that I did something I never did before, I told everyone I was struggling and sought them out (as friends are supposed to be there for you right? I guess not if you were never their real friends to begin with it seems) ... and they all disappeared (some straight away, others took a month or two) ... until I was literally alone. This broke my heart. And I don't know what to do. I often walk by the man who made me realise this. Before my misery drove everyone away he was like my best friend. We'd catch up every week ... it was awkward catchups because we are both awkward people, but that's why I liked him so much. It was like we are both the same kind of outsider (but unlike me everyone seems to love him) ... but now he pretends he doesn't' see me when our paths cross. I saw him just yesterday, and he literally looked up at me, his face turned dark and than he looked away. I realise that this is my fault. I freaked him right out with my misery, when I realised I alienated him my last words to him was that I'd never bother him again but if he wanted to catch up I'm always here. That was probably 18 months ago. Occasionally he'll wave from a afar if he sees me, but mostly he pretends he doesn't see me. And this is devastating. He was my last friend on this crappy world. I've tried to move on. Make new friends, a new canvas. I have pretty bad social anxiety too, so anything to do with people is hard, but I try and it's the same old story. The best I can hope for is people humouring me ... I feel like one those chronically unlikable ladies who goes around talking to strangers cause nobody else will. I don't even think I'm unlikable, I'm awkward sure, and different, I have trouble talking. But I'm friendly, and have stack of interesting hobbies that other folk usually rave about. But I'm always "that" person, "that freak." I'm so lonely. Would like some advice on how to make a real friend. I'm on the autism spectrum btw ... so I'm sure that ads to my creepiness that repels the rest of humanity

shortone123 I don't know what to do
  • replies: 3

For the last 6-8 months I've felt really sad and miserable. I've constantly felt like everyone's against me and that they all hate me. Sometimes I just wonder if I'm good enough and if all this is my fault. i always seem to do something wrong, my par... View more

For the last 6-8 months I've felt really sad and miserable. I've constantly felt like everyone's against me and that they all hate me. Sometimes I just wonder if I'm good enough and if all this is my fault. i always seem to do something wrong, my parents are always mad and me. I tried taking to my dad but he was flying off to London the next day and we haven't talked about it since. I feel like if I bring it up to my parents again they would just ignore it. i know I need help but I don't know how. I don't know what to do

Bazleenus Is there anything i can do about weight?
  • replies: 2

So firstly i just thought i'd give you a quick rundown on whats happened etc Ive had sleeping issues for years, since about 17 years old.. And i never really understood why, and then they would go away and then they would come back, and anyway i star... View more

So firstly i just thought i'd give you a quick rundown on whats happened etc Ive had sleeping issues for years, since about 17 years old.. And i never really understood why, and then they would go away and then they would come back, and anyway i started a new job last year at the start of the year and i was getting really anxious at work, and panic attacks blah blah blah. I had one of those samsung watches, i knew i was anxious, but i was unsure how extreme. The watch was telling me my watch was getting up to about 190bpm and i was like wow, i dealt with it for a while and then it started getting more panic wise and i would make mistakes at work and my throat was getting tight etc etc Anyway, they tried to treat me with medication to help treat the anxiousness and the sleep and I literally put on 4kg in 1 week, my appetite when absolutely effing crazy, i could not stop eating. So i told the doctor no.. im not taking these (really self concious about weight) And then they gave me this other one, did the same thing, helped with sleep for about 3 days, stopped working for sleep and made me super hungry. So i said no again... Then, i got put on another medication.. Well... Then we uncovered a bipolar disorder that i have, that i didnt really know was a thing. Since then, i have been taking some other medications instead, and i feel like i dont eat? Like i literally feel like i dont eat as much as i should. But i keep putting on weight? I dont drink much soft caloric softdrinks, mainly pepsi max if i do. When i can actually go to work, i walk like 5-6km in a night, but the weight around the stomach still keeps appearing. I literally feel if i eat one thing bad, or one thing too creamy, or too cheesy that i just chuck it straight on? The point of this post... If there is anybody out there with bipolar battling this same issue, is there something that will help my situation that i can speak to my doctor about? Now that i actually notice my super fast stupid cycling, and im down... It is literally hard to even think about cooking or being healthy, or even washing clothes, and when i go high... I feel like im on amphetamines? And i dont really eat too much at all, and i clench my jaw like no tomorrow till the point it gets so sore, go fully hyperfocus... I have googled alternate medications for bipolar disorder, but EVERY single one says weight gain.. And im really honestly stuck between being unstable and manic, or being fat and even more depressed. Thanks

Hugh_Glass Starting all over again in my late 20s. Totally lost
  • replies: 4

I spent nearly a decade out of high school in the construction industry. I did everything "right". I finished my apprenticeship and found full time employment (or so I thought). After a while I realised that I was making far less than my peers. I con... View more

I spent nearly a decade out of high school in the construction industry. I did everything "right". I finished my apprenticeship and found full time employment (or so I thought). After a while I realised that I was making far less than my peers. I consulted with FairWork and found I was being severely exploited in a sham contracting situation. My boss had been having a field day due to my naivety. I started standing up for my rights and was ostracized and bullied by my boss and co-workers to the point where I started losing the will to be here and quit. I took another job out of sheer desperation and was coerced into another sham contract. This time I was fired and nastily abused on the phone after I said no to being ordered to climb on a roof with no safety equipment by another "sub contractor". I then had to threaten legal action and asked FairWork for assistance to get paid for my last week of work as the boss didn't pay me and stopped answering his phone. FairWork were useless and did nothing about anything. I'm now studying at uni in hopes of bettering my future but I can't work with a full uni schedule and AusStudy only covers my groceries and half of my utility bills. I'm living on a small amount of inheritance from my beautiful grandma who passed recently which I feel horribly guilty about and when that runs out, I'll have no money at all. Luckily my dad is helping to the best of his ability and I'm blessed with a beautiful and understanding GF but I don't know if she'll stick around if I can't even afford to buy food. I just don't really see the point in trying anymore. I feel like a failure and like society has massively failed me at the same time. It's like I'm a cog in the huge, dirty, stinking machine that is our economy and when I started squeaking too much I was taken out and thrown into the mud with the other rubbish. I don't talk to my friends anymore because they all became narcissistic robots who only care about competing with each other on social media to see who has the best holidays/stuff. It makes me sick. I don't derive enjoyment from the things I used to. My libido is gone. The few people I try to talk to (apart from my girlfriend) just tell me how "lucky" I am compared to *insert other disadvantaged group*. I feel so alone and taken advantage of. I have horrible social anxiety due to my low (non existent) occupational status for my age. I can't sleep most nights. I don't know what to do and I don't see any point in any of this.

Anothermonday Apathy to everything
  • replies: 2

It has been going on for about a year but everyday I feel more and more apathetic to the point where I simply don't care anymore. The excitements i used to have for work and the future is gone. My performance was slipping at work, so I have resigned ... View more

It has been going on for about a year but everyday I feel more and more apathetic to the point where I simply don't care anymore. The excitements i used to have for work and the future is gone. My performance was slipping at work, so I have resigned but I have no motivation to get up in the morning and try to find another job about a month ago. I barely stay in touch with my old friends and my hobbies no longer interest me. The only thing that I am still consistently doing is playing poker casually but I'm wondering if that is becoming an addiction. It just feels that the only time anyone speaks to me is when they want something and I am just fed up with everything. I'm not sure what to do next or where to turn or what to do next. I wouldn't say that I'm feeling anxious, more so flat and defeated and it ist just coming up to my mid 20's birthday.

Momsspagetti Recently lost my job. Not feeling good
  • replies: 3

I lost my job 4 weeks ago. I was told I was making mistakes and that they decided not to continue my employment. i left another job for this one. its been 4 weeks now I have had 2 interviews. 1 for a job that I didn’t want but I need a job. i feel us... View more

I lost my job 4 weeks ago. I was told I was making mistakes and that they decided not to continue my employment. i left another job for this one. its been 4 weeks now I have had 2 interviews. 1 for a job that I didn’t want but I need a job. i feel useless. I am bored. I don’t know what else to do.

CaptainSwing "Being Happy" by Andrew Matthews
  • replies: 3

This book was recommended by a psychologist to me as part of treatment - but it is terrible! I am not sure whether I am just reading it wrong or expected something different (I have never read a self-help book before) but I struggle to get past some ... View more

This book was recommended by a psychologist to me as part of treatment - but it is terrible! I am not sure whether I am just reading it wrong or expected something different (I have never read a self-help book before) but I struggle to get past some of the awful metaphors used i.e. planting a banana in Antarctica and being surprised you never harvest more bananas. Bananas don't have seeds that can be grown into trees, it makes me doubt whether any of the advice given is of any use at all. More examples: the book stresses that "people who expect to get sick get sick" but it's clearly a load of tosh, with no evidence given, but stated as some kind of fact as if projecting wellness onto yourself is going to protect you from bacteria or germs or whatever. Or that people that have accidents have some kind of self-harm death wish that regularly manifests itself by forcing you to climb rickety ladders. Anyway, I'm not sure how to go back to the psychologist and tell him the book is rubbish. He has been helpful so far, but spending $25 on some kind of drippy pile of unsupported anecdotes and drivel has annoyed the daylights out of me. Has anybody else read this book and got something useful out of it?