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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Asmaan Mistreatments at work
  • replies: 2

Hi, I am new to the forum. Since last few weeks I am going through terrible time and it has now reached to a level where I feel so stressed and depressed that I cannot at times breath. I am suddenly treated strangely at work. I was removed from a pro... View more

Hi, I am new to the forum. Since last few weeks I am going through terrible time and it has now reached to a level where I feel so stressed and depressed that I cannot at times breath. I am suddenly treated strangely at work. I was removed from a project and someone with similar designation and lesser experience was given the opportunity. There was no communication from my management, keep in mind I am pretty high on designation, so my reporting management are the State operational heads. I am shut down when I tried to reach out and ask “ why?”. My hours were reduced, while keeping this other person full time because allegedly she/ he has work - which actually is my project handed over to her/ him. They are avoiding me in every possible manner, including the HR. I am very passionate about my job and have always been highly productive. Never in my life have I felt so belittled, humiliated. I have no say in my own job now. I have my family abroad, with Covid 19, I am super worried about them and the fact that in case of emergency I cannot even go there- makes the situation worse. i am usually very strong and do not really share matters with anyone. Solving my problems myself is the way it has always been. But, first time in life , I don’t know what to do. This feeling of being “ worthless & helpless “ is killing me. I feel like running away , but I also need the job to put food on tables both here and back home. It took me a lot of internal fight to convince myself to join the forum and write this. So thank you to anyone who might be reading this. I have no idea what to do next!!!! Thanks Asmaan

alexiaalexia How can I help him?
  • replies: 3

I've been seeing this guy for three months and we're both in our early 20's so we're still both quite young. Things were going extremely well I've never met someone like him and we both had such amazing times together. The past two and half weeks som... View more

I've been seeing this guy for three months and we're both in our early 20's so we're still both quite young. Things were going extremely well I've never met someone like him and we both had such amazing times together. The past two and half weeks something was really off about him and I was super worried, I spoke to his friends and they noticed that something was off too. He was shutting everyone out and wouldn't answer messages or calls so it worried me. He's a very closed person so he finds it rather difficult to open up to people and I had only known him three months so I didn't expect him to tell me what was wrong. I eventually was able to catch up with him in person and he told me that he's severely depressed. I was so proud of him for opening up and I reassured him that it's okay to not be okay and that he had to get help and go and see someone which he agreed. We both then made the decision to stop seeing each other because he didn't think it was fair how he had 'treated' me and he wanted to be able to find happiness and love within himself before he could love someone else which I completely agreed with. It's such a tough situation because no one did anything wrong, it wasn't anyone's fault and we still have such strong feelings for one another but we just can't be together right now. He told me not to wait for him and to try and move on because it's not fair if he holds me back but I'm finding it really hard right now because I have such strong feelings for him. Obviously we've completely cut contact and I told him I'll always be there for him if he ever needs to reach out but I feel so helpless and lost and I don't know what to do. I so badly want to message him once a month to check up but I know I need to respect his space and his decision. It sounds extremely selfish but I don't know whether I should wait for him or to try and move on because I've never met someone like him and I don't want to give up just yet because he's so strong and I know he'll find happiness.

mikayla_f depression from regret
  • replies: 2

I have been having bad thoughts about regret for the last month and I need some help im so stuck and feel like I want to die

I have been having bad thoughts about regret for the last month and I need some help im so stuck and feel like I want to die

Jaymore Everything is falling apart, no motivation and no desire
  • replies: 2

I've posted on here a few times in the past, I don't know if this time is worse but I suppose that doesn't really matter. I've had depression and depression-like symptoms since I was 9 and here I am again after things have been getting worse in the p... View more

I've posted on here a few times in the past, I don't know if this time is worse but I suppose that doesn't really matter. I've had depression and depression-like symptoms since I was 9 and here I am again after things have been getting worse in the past few weeks. I'm 19, have been living out of home since early February and thought I was coping with everything. I've started losing motivation for everything that goes on in my life. I'm weeks behind on uni with two assignments due in the next few days with so much left to do. Then another two in the next few weeks. I know I have to do them, and I want to do well, but I can't bring myself to get out of bed. I've always been really into running and at state league level in my sport but since I took a few weeks off to heal my knee, then getting sick as well, I cannot be bothered to even go for a walk. I have no desire to eat food or drink water. My sport has always motivated me no matter what, until now. I thought it was my future, but I've completely fallen out of love with it. A lot of the time when I feel down I cannot really describe what exactly it is that's bothering me. I just feel dazed and like I don't really care what happens. I've had some really bad nights recently. Then last night it got worse. I found out my boyfriend had been flirting with another guy. Initially I was telling myself it wasn't my fault. But now I just feel so worthless and that if I was a good partner to him, then maybe he wouldn't have done it. Despite everything going on, my relationship was going great. I really felt like I was in love with him. Now I can't trust him, and I don't know if I should end the relationship. I'm divided on that. So yeah, my motivation for simple tasks, my hobbies, and for living a healthy lifestyle has gone out the window. Everyday I lie in bed with no energy to do anything. I know I should start with getting my eating habits back to normal, but I can't bring myself to do it. For anyone reading, I appreciate that you've gotten this far. Hope you are all doing okay. I'm grateful for this community

bella_06 feeling numb, stuck and self-destructing
  • replies: 6

For almost a year now i have been feeling numb and lonely. I have a partner of 2 years and i constantly feel like i'm not enough. he pays more attention to his phone than to his family. We have a 15mo and it is tough. I don't know how to cope with ev... View more

For almost a year now i have been feeling numb and lonely. I have a partner of 2 years and i constantly feel like i'm not enough. he pays more attention to his phone than to his family. We have a 15mo and it is tough. I don't know how to cope with everything. I try talking but he doesn't understand life with anxiety and depression. I know i have been snapping but after losing my grandmother a year ago, i feel so lost and broken. (he wasn't there to support me and help me when i needed and i feel this pushed me away). I had to remain strong for everyone (because thats's how i cope). now i just want to feel something, anything. All i can feel is pain. I have self-destructed and with the pressure and stress of this virus i don't know how to be okay. I have tried to explain when i snap its because i am scared and need reassurance, he just doesn't understand and it makes me feel like a monster. he has called me over dramatic and said i'm taking it overboard. I feel the stress of everything and i just don't know how to feel safe and normal. I'm trying to protect my daughter and myself, yet he makes me feel crazy. I know i am pushing him away because i have been hurt in the past and i never want to allow anyone to hurt me anymore. After a small argument he said he started packing his bags to go until i can stop being paranoid with the virus. That just broke me and i have ended things. I don't feel anything. I am numb, i just don't know whether i still love him. I should feel hurt and sad, but i don't, i feel nothing. I feel so out of control and like i don't know what i want because i can't feel anything. I feel so lost because i can't even make decisions in my life based on my emotions because i feel nothing How do i feel things again i just want this feeling to go away.

fifithebunni Here I Am Again...
  • replies: 4

It sneaks up on you, in such a way you're kind of used to it. And then you come to a point where you want to cry so badly but you're numb, and you want to hurt yourself to externalise the pain. I guess I have a lot to be grateful for. I'm blessed wit... View more

It sneaks up on you, in such a way you're kind of used to it. And then you come to a point where you want to cry so badly but you're numb, and you want to hurt yourself to externalise the pain. I guess I have a lot to be grateful for. I'm blessed with an awesome kid with whom I have a great relationship. I've got a home and I don't need to worry about being kicked out by the landlord etc . But, this feeling of failing and hopelessness is so overwhelming I'm physically weakened by it. I despair at how I'm not able to provide my son the opportunities that I think he deserves. He is such a smart and special child. I'm deeply ashamed that he sees me in the state of weakness and he worries about me and wants to help. My biggest embarrassment is my work/job situation. I simply don't know how to break out and improve my earning capacity. I stare at my CV and don't know how to sell myself. I suppose my confidence is just completely shattered. Have been doing 2 jobs over the last few years, and neither brings good money or growth. And yet I have no real prospect of doing something completely different. If you ask me what I have passion for, I don't even know what it's like to have passion for anything. I think I'm so sick and tired of myself asking the same questions over and over again, and never have had clarity and sense of direction. I feel I'm eternally lost and stuck in the void. I am mostly happy to be by myself, I guess I do still love life. And yet there are moments I so crave to have someone to confide to, someone to bounce ideas off, someone to laugh with, or simply someone to give me a cuddle. I don't even know where to begin in finding that special someone. Tried online dating, seasons come seasons go. As much as I can approach it with good humour, open mind and general compassion, I find it harder and harder to not be cynical. I always believe that life in itself is the most previous thing and worth living. But this pain, numbness, sense of despair and hopelessness is hard to shake off. Is it simply somethings one should learn to live with? Stoicism? I guess I still dream of shining my light in some way. I just don't know what that way is, and worry that the flickering is getting too dim.

believe248 Is my partner depressed?
  • replies: 2

Most of the time my partner of 2+ years is in a really good mood, he makes jokes & acts silly, exercises, is really affectionate and caring. But a couple of times a month, or sometimes even once a week, his mood suddenly takes a nose dive. For a coup... View more

Most of the time my partner of 2+ years is in a really good mood, he makes jokes & acts silly, exercises, is really affectionate and caring. But a couple of times a month, or sometimes even once a week, his mood suddenly takes a nose dive. For a couple of days he totally withdraws, stops eating properly, avoids me or when he does talk to me he's cold or even sometimes rude ir snappy. He is in this mood right now, i believe triggered by the stress he is feeling from losing his job due to Covid. Im not sure if it is depression, given typically he'll bounce back to normal within a day or so. I really feel for him during this tough time, but I am also a sufferer of anxiety and being suddenly ignored and snapped at makes me really stressed. Its like emotional whiplash. Im trying my hardest to be patient and focus on my own happiness, but it's hard not to feel on edge. Also I'm pregnant with our first child , and it terrifies me as to what will happen if we can't work this out. I would appreciate any advice as I'm a bit lost on what to do.

BrendonG93 I don't know how to get out of this headspace
  • replies: 2

Hey all. I'm a 27yr old gay man, and have been out since I was in my early teens. Throughout most of my school life, I was bullied frequently about being openly gay, which took its toll on my every day life. I feel it is probably a part of the reason... View more

Hey all. I'm a 27yr old gay man, and have been out since I was in my early teens. Throughout most of my school life, I was bullied frequently about being openly gay, which took its toll on my every day life. I feel it is probably a part of the reason I'm here tonight typing this out. Since leaving school, I've been struggling with self-confidence issues, constant feeling of loneliness, motivation issues, memory decline, lack of concentration, sleeplessness / inability to wake up feeling refreshed, minimal appetite, gaming / movie addiction, distancing myself from family & friends... Even right now I'm struggling to think of what's been going on. The last 10 years or so are, for lack of a better word, blurry. I've even gotten to a point where I was considering contacting the local Army base to see if they would put me through training without being enlisted to join, just to try to snap myself out of this mindset - and to me, that sounds extreme. I've tried seeing a psychologist, at my GPs recommendation, and found that it didn't seem to help me - mainly because of cost, and they would give me 'homework' to do, which doesn't work well with motivational issues. I know change starts with me, as they say, but I simply cannot kick this lazy, lonely, depressing mindset to be able to commit to changing things. Part of me wants to hire my own personal trainer to come around, kick me out of bed each morning and force me into doing things, hence why I thought about the Army training camps. Loneliness is definitely one of the biggest feelings I have a lot of the time, even when I'm with my closest friends. I often find myself swiping through apps like Grindr, Tinder, Hinge etc trying to find 'Mr Right' in an attempt to soothe the lonely feeling and lack of fulfilment that I have. Among other issues, I don't even know what career path I would like to follow. I used to have a huge passion for music production, but lost interest in that after I left school. I thought about going into social work recently, as I feel I would excel in that field, especially working with LGBT people, considering I have life experience - but I need to fix myself before I can help fix others, right? What do I do? I'm totally lost. I can't even save money to move out of home because I compulsively spend. Plus I don't have my license either, but that's a separate issue, or could it be related to my motivation? Who knows. Any advice, any thoughts - please send them through. Thanks, Brendon.

mocha delight Should I still feel this way?
  • replies: 2

Should I still be feeling so up and down while being on a antidepressants? I don’t think still having family drama on one side of my family helps which I have no control over and don’t see the drama ending anytime soon. And still don’t feel anything ... View more

Should I still be feeling so up and down while being on a antidepressants? I don’t think still having family drama on one side of my family helps which I have no control over and don’t see the drama ending anytime soon. And still don’t feel anything since my grandma passed away the same week I started on antidepressants. Sleeping wise has improved since my gp prescribed something to help me sleep at night.

kjs Depression and pregnancy
  • replies: 2

Hi all, I was diagnosed with depression and social anxiety when I was 18. Since then I have had many ups and downs and am experiencing another depressive period at the moment. My partner and I both would love to start a family. It has been a life-lon... View more

Hi all, I was diagnosed with depression and social anxiety when I was 18. Since then I have had many ups and downs and am experiencing another depressive period at the moment. My partner and I both would love to start a family. It has been a life-long goal of mine as I love working with and being involved with children. I'm seeking other people's opinions of experience as I am terrified. I want to be able to provide the adequate care for my baby but am frightened of the depression and what I might be like during and after pregnancy. I also worry about having my children miss out on things due to my mental health. I spoke with my psychiatrist about it briefly today and he suggested staying on my medications because he thinks it would be too risky to come off them and said it would be safe to do so. I had booked an appointment for next week to have my Implanon removed but after feeling so low again recently I'm thinking I'll go in and discuss my concerns with my gp and remove it at a later date when I'm feeling well again. Any advice would be great! Have a nice day ☺