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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the chats on this Forum having been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Pink grapefruit Loneliness
  • replies: 7

Hi. I often feel that people hate me and are trying to pull me down. I want to enjoy life but I feel that I live with such fear. Is it normal or something wrong with me..

Hi. I often feel that people hate me and are trying to pull me down. I want to enjoy life but I feel that I live with such fear. Is it normal or something wrong with me..

Superherogirl Not depressed enough
  • replies: 3

Hello. I'm only young and started high school last year. I just made this account because sometimes I feel like there aren't any friends I can get close to or talk to. I really want to have one, close friend that I spend all my time with but i feel l... View more

Hello. I'm only young and started high school last year. I just made this account because sometimes I feel like there aren't any friends I can get close to or talk to. I really want to have one, close friend that I spend all my time with but i feel like I'm too toxic or picky or rude or mean to do that. I just never put in effort with my other friends and I can't find anyone I really like and I miss my old friend from primary school. I'm always the secondary friend to everyone I know, and it just leaves me feeling to dejected. It's sort of like a paradox, where I struggle between not wanting to be with my friends and wanting so badly for them to like me. I just think that if I left all of them, nobody would really care because no matter how long I've known you there are always better people to be around. I haven't properly had a best friend since I was maybe nine? Everyone always likes other people more. I have nobody I want to talk to at school. And the schoolwork is so overwhelming- I'm in an academic program, and even though neither of my parents forced me into it I always wanted to be the best at everything. It's like no matter what, if my grades aren't perfect I will have a full on mental breakdown. It's awful, because if I don't get a grade up to my standards I'll just start crying. I know I'm smart, and I know I'm good enough, but I just can't stand it. Also, my appearance. Some days I feel pretty, but others I just wish I didn't have to see anyone. I have some acne that I know isn't very bad, but I just hate it. I hate looking in the mirror and knowing nothing's changed and I'm still ugly. The worst part is that I want therapy, I want to be on these platforms, but don't ever want my parents to know. I want them.to think I'm fine because then we never need to talk about it. And the whole time this goes through my head I feel so selfish for even wanting therapy, because I probably don't have depression and I'm just an attention seeker who is overreacting. No matter how I feel, how much some days I wish for new parents, or a new face, or a new personality, I'm some There might not be much you can do for me, but just a reply would be nice. Just someone to talk to.

Jaibigrone907 The world is overrated because of people!
  • replies: 12

1) Society only conceives themselves and they don't try to understand others. Everyone's bias and no one can disagree with themselves typically. 2) People either cause your problems, they otherwise don't care, or they even potentially enjoy hearing a... View more

1) Society only conceives themselves and they don't try to understand others. Everyone's bias and no one can disagree with themselves typically. 2) People either cause your problems, they otherwise don't care, or they even potentially enjoy hearing about them with some. 3) Advice and support is usually cliché, interaction is superficial, often the only redirected recommendation is shrinks that leads to detrimental pharmaceutical treatment and involuntary clients who feel invalided and become victims. 4) I can't relate to my nationalities culture, only since my generation globally is following a unified consensus to not be interested or believing in Christianity Religion or with being all under the same political left wing mainstream consensus. I find their indisputable with any of their popularised views and they argue with illogic. They project their insecurities too often and they can't have as much meaningful or broaden conversation, everything's usually awkward, weird, or whose cringe, a hipster, desperate and they feel things are worth addressing. I don't like their music since 2008, their too into Andrew Tate, women aren't prude. I only like older generations. 5) The 21st Century is horrible, people are high consumers and overt materialist's, which than makes them more socially superficial, shallow, narcissistic, insincere. Their less emotional courtesy and manners today, people are more grandiose and with potential audacity to not care, it's too much with financial net worth and being entitled. I don't like globalism - diversity. 6) Everyone's more innocent until proven guilty and they won't take needed accountability, they have no humility to be wrong anymore, they treat sincerity and make it that your so humble or rare, to normalise to feel & be mental, fake and laugh at what's true or say that it's strange or weird, but to be guilty of the same acknowledged things. 7) I couldn't relate to my father. I am a male cultural misfit Christian Fundamentalist and my father is a generic misogynistic that's chauvinistic, sexist. His got no issue with the bloke culture in my opinion and he is stoic and selfish, His not creative. He tries to vicariously live his sports team through me at times and he diverts his illiterate limits onto me that I'm dyslexic. His potential with rarer jealousy and puts his average mediocrity on a pedestal with being the bread winner and the family bill payer. His sister and family is narcissistic and with dysfunctional differences.

Stardust Dealing with a controlling other parent
  • replies: 1

I have been with my partner for 11 years. He has a controlling x partner who he shares custody of kids with. The 13 year old does dance 9- 1 hour classes, the 15 year old does 3 drama classes and is working about 2 times a week. We have recently had ... View more

I have been with my partner for 11 years. He has a controlling x partner who he shares custody of kids with. The 13 year old does dance 9- 1 hour classes, the 15 year old does 3 drama classes and is working about 2 times a week. We have recently had to drop 1 class each due to the fact we cant get them there. We received a not so nice messages cause we should be able to because she can. We don't care about the kids and don't want them to be happy.We are so proud of the 15 year old getting a job but she is controlling how he uses the money he earns. $180 in a weeks pay has been broken down to $20 to our house $40 to spend at her house and $120 to save for her house. ( big pay due to school holidays) They also have phones but she is using that now to control our weeks. She doesn't use them to communicate and say hi etc or anything that needs to be communicated she is using them to see what is going on at our house. ( she has a tracker also on the phone) so every time we leave the house there is questions about where we are going. oh your not going to school today? no the bus was just late. oh and it was great the day that we were making the 13 year old go to school when she didn't want to so her mother told her to go to school as normal on the bus so dad doesn't know and walk down to her work. That's just a brief on some of what's going on. I'm at a loss of what to do, i hate seeing the kids upset cause she is trying to control our weeks. i know we don't know everything and are learning every day but does that mean she gets to make all the decisions for the kids cause i know no parent gets it all right, am i wrong in these thoughts?She keeps all awards, trophies makes all the decisions, never lets us know of excursions, even the ones that fall on our week, don't know of doctors appointments etc not allowed to get there hair cut, not allowed to buy extra dance, drama uniforms for our week, kids don't tell us much cause they are scared of making her angry. We let it all go to save the kids cause when we were trying to fix it the kids were even more upset then they are now. cause she just keeps saying i do what i want and you will do what i want because that is co parenting.. I'm just so depressed not be able to just live our lives and it is ruining our relationship and i can't deal, these kids are my world to its bad enough to have to share kids for any parent let alone feel like we are being controlled all the time and cant live our lives because of it.

tortuedtofu Falling deeper and deeper
  • replies: 1

The last few days I've been falling deeper and deeper into depression.I've been diagnosed with depression and anxiety. I had health anxiety at first for a week which subsided after seeing the GP. And then my depression kicked in and has been working ... View more

The last few days I've been falling deeper and deeper into depression.I've been diagnosed with depression and anxiety. I had health anxiety at first for a week which subsided after seeing the GP. And then my depression kicked in and has been working in overdrive. It almost feels crippling, I cry almost everyday several times a day.I'm in my 40s and struggling with finding a partner and feel like my time has past.I also can't let go of my past, constantly thinking of things I could of done and should of done. I see people's past on social media and makes me depressed how I couldn't have the same experience. Maybe if I want a family I would feel embarrassed sharing my life choices.I also can't stop thinking about death and how I don't feel like I have much time left.

Outside observing Just a another depressed Sunday
  • replies: 1

I think my experience is like so many others and yet I can't connect with people. I can barely get out of bed because I see little point in doing so. I feel like my life is falling apart and I am sabotaging my future career by just putting in the min... View more

I think my experience is like so many others and yet I can't connect with people. I can barely get out of bed because I see little point in doing so. I feel like my life is falling apart and I am sabotaging my future career by just putting in the minimum. I am anhedonic. No one seems to see it or care. So why should I care?

asianaussie 27, still stuck with controlling parents, and an addiction to luxury services
  • replies: 7

I'm 27 in 3 weeks. I'm still living in my parent's home with parents who continue to control how I manage my money, won't let me drive on my own, not even pay for a home/apartment. When I try to do chores (such as washing clothes or fixing a light bu... View more

I'm 27 in 3 weeks. I'm still living in my parent's home with parents who continue to control how I manage my money, won't let me drive on my own, not even pay for a home/apartment. When I try to do chores (such as washing clothes or fixing a light bulb), they criticise how I do it and take over. When I was with my father at Coles, and I tried to pay, he butted in and gave the cashier his card. She looked at me as if I was spoiled. My mother is excessive to the point she has given away my clothes, belongings and changed furniture. She's looked through my wallet and once confiscated my card, because 'I spend way too much'. She's criticised my 'sexy dress style' and told me to 'lose some weight', hence why she's given them away. They've recently become concerned that I'm still single and unmarried, and are pressuring me to 'give them grandchildren before they die'. While they pay for my taxes, fees, and support me financially, they don't care about me emotionally. When I've felt down and upset, they would mock and dismiss my problems, telling me to just get over it'. They laughed at me when having dark thoughts, saying it's nothing compared to 'them escaping war and having family members pass away from war.' On the surface, people look down on me, thinking I'm spoiled and entitled. But the truth is, I've felt so trapped, misunderstood, embarrassed, and repressed. Ironically, it's come to a point where I've splurged in luxury and self-care (aka, makeup, body treatments, and Chanel). I love glamming up and hitting the bars/clubs and socialising with people. Nothing is more thrilling than people telling me I look 'hot' and having guys and girls flirt with me. (My family doesn't know I'm bisexual, and they're anti-LGBT). I've always felt so insecure about my actual life, my working-class background, my controlling parents, and loathe my body image. I'm embarrassed about my excessive spending and budgeting struggles. I feel so embarrassed that while my friends are getting married and becoming parents, I'm the one still being parented. I'm still the one who has to be followed around, check on, and have barely a say in my own financial and other decisions. Just because they paid for my school, taxes and fled war does not mean that they care about me. All I just want is to be truly loved, and trusted. Hugs and kisses mean far more to me, than a house they will give to me after they pass. I'm just too conflicted right now. Much appreciated.

CAR Teenage daughter school reluctance/depression
  • replies: 6

My 14 year old daughter has been diagnosed with depression, which has worsened in last two months due to her bf of almost a year ending relationship and blocking her on every platform. Her school reluctance worsened last term and she started on medic... View more

My 14 year old daughter has been diagnosed with depression, which has worsened in last two months due to her bf of almost a year ending relationship and blocking her on every platform. Her school reluctance worsened last term and she started on medication which didn’t rectify but certainly made her a little better. Sadly two weeks ago she met a 16yo boy who is telling her everything she wants to hear while giving her access to drugs/alcohol. Two weeks ago, she didn’t return home after shopping as planned and we had to get police involved as she’d switched off her phone. We don’t know any of the kids she’s hanging out with as they’re from 30-60 mins away from home and obviously in different schools/years. The police went to meet daughter for welfare check and she said she’s not coming home, my husband took her mobile from her in frustration so we very reluctantly agreed to come home. After a week of making up to us, we agreed for her to go shopping with a girlfriend 8am Saturday morning. She did not return until 3.15pm the following day. We were worried sick but this time she did tell us she was safe with friends (turns out she was with bf). Police say there’s nothing can be done as crime not committed! That we actually don’t know but bf has sent me a photo of his bed with caption ‘who doin wat’. Husband said he’s taunting us as he’s lied to us since start about even being with daughter. Now her school friends have said she hanging with wrong crowd and don’t want to be around her anymore, this is pushing her further away and she’s now refusing to go to school. Both dad and I are at a complete loss. We spend time together, ferry her to and from work/school. She turns 15 next week and we always do something extra special for birthdays., some people say take everything away, some don’t. Police said taking her phone away won’t solve problem. It’s just heartbreaking at a time she needs her friends, they’re backing off yet some of them helped her deceive us about where she was anyway!

Throwaway Afraid to reachout or talk to someone
  • replies: 3

For a while maybe a year or 2 I'm not sure because i haven't kept count but i have been feeling quite down and empty and alone, near the start of the year i got into a relationship but in recent months i feel like we're drifting apart and the lonely,... View more

For a while maybe a year or 2 I'm not sure because i haven't kept count but i have been feeling quite down and empty and alone, near the start of the year i got into a relationship but in recent months i feel like we're drifting apart and the lonely, sad and empty feelings are coming back, whenever i comfront her about anything she spins it around to find a way to make herself the victim and I'm just done with her, but the main thing for me is these feelings I've been feeling, i don't know how to express them properly or talk to someone about this, lot's of people here say to see a professional, but being a minor and all it's hard to go to a professional alone with the case of my parent's having my medicare details, I'm most afraid of coming out to my parents about this because i don't know how they will react or if they'll even believe me. I have reached out to a friend and he recommended me to reach out using a hotline so i found this site and decided to share here and i thought i might as well share, i just don't know what to do with these feelings and how to manage it without making obvious changes in my life that people will notice, I'm highly scared about how others will react to me feeling these things, especially the change in how people act towards me once they know I'm struggling like this, so it just feels right taking a leap of faith and getting advice from others here anonymously.

Spence1111 DSP stopped due to moving overseas
  • replies: 1

Hello... My brother suffers from Schizophrenia and has been on a DSP since returning to Australia in 2011 and on the UK version whilst residing in the UK for the 15 years prior to this. He is mid 50's now and still lives with my parents who moved to ... View more

Hello... My brother suffers from Schizophrenia and has been on a DSP since returning to Australia in 2011 and on the UK version whilst residing in the UK for the 15 years prior to this. He is mid 50's now and still lives with my parents who moved to Ireland 12 months ago. My mum contacted Centrelink to ask about the portability of both their aged pensions and his DSP and was told that they would be able to continue. What she wasn't told was he should have had a review before leaving in order to 'secure' his DSP and after four weeks of leaving his pension has been stopped. He has had nothing for the past year. He has never worked and has never lived alone and in order to reinstate his pension Centrelink have told him he needs to be re-assessed by a Dr in Ireland. His new Dr advised my mum (who acts on his behlaf) that there is no way he could provide the level of detail required to complete the documentation. We appealed the centrelink decision which was unsuccessful based upon the 4 week rule and I now have an Administrative Appeal Tribunal hearing on Tuesday to challenge the decision again. If this is unsuccessful which I fully expect it to be as they are only focusing on the 4 week rule I'm wondering if I just have him fly back to Australia.....re-apply which I would think would be accepted and then once it's reinstated have him return to Ireland and his home with my parents. It's brutal how they can cut someone off on a technicality and provide no support around how to resolve a situation which is clearly based on poor information and a minor oversight. No support provided and I'm so angry. Just venting really and would be interested in anyone who has had to reapply or had issue when moving overseas or with the AAT. Thanks all.