Always exhausted

Lollie45 · ‎10-10-2016

I am always bone tired, no energy to do anthing that I like doing or need to do. All my good energy gets used up at work being kind, caring and 'happy'. The well is dry by the time I get home. My kids are suffering from me being disengaged and are lazy and unhelpful because why shouldn't they be, what kind of role model am I? My housework is suffering and it just makes me more dispondent. I have all these good intentions and ideas going around in my head but I am just so tired. Blood tests are all normal. I am on medication but it doesn't help, never has. I have had depression to various degrees for 13 years. I used to be so organised, houseproud, go getter and enthusiastic about life. Now I just exist. I have done cognitive therapy and meditate sometimes and write in a journal sometimes too. I just can't seem to get out of this fatigued funk.

Cornstarch · ‎10-10-2016

Fatigued Funk how do we help you get Groove?

You know what I don't mean that, because that comes across to you as though I am saying what you are experiencing inside is unacceptable. Which isn't true. You can feel this way.

With such little info it's hard to comment except to give you the practical suggestions of going back to the GP and maybe trying another medication, another clinical psychologist, but that doesn't help the work situation.

Work sounds utterly exhausting, a culture/office of energy vampires, or are you a little guilty of giving too much in too many places all at once for far, far too long?

Now the one on the throne at this work place who is in charge, are they causing trouble too? It's a female isn't it.

Small_Inside · ‎10-10-2016

Hi Lollie, I know how you feel. I have a similar problem. For me, there doesn't appear to be a reason for the tiredness, either, which is incredibly frustrating. There's a tendency to just feel so...weak. Even though you're not. And I know it's easy for me to say this rather than you believe it, but I think you are doing an admirable job. I don't have half so much going on as you do, and I can only imagine how much responsibility you are taking on between work and home and kids.

I wish I had more words of wisdom or comfort for you. I would really like to help. But in the meantime, please talk to us.

Lollie45 · ‎10-10-2016

I actually like my job, I just work in a highly emotional field. My coworkers are very supportive. I just don't know how to shake of the emotional strain/attachments from my job.

Lollie45 · ‎10-10-2016

I'm a 'healer' a 'fixer' to everyone else but don't quite know how to do the same for myself, no that's wrong, I do know what to do but just have no energy or enthusiasm to do it.

ReeBecca · ‎10-10-2016

Hi Lollie

I had to double check when I started reading your post that I wasn't reading one I'd written myself! I feel exactly the same. Especially feeling like you spend the day being happy kind and caring all day and the well is dry by the time you get home. I feel like my family is suffering because of my lack of energy and zest for life as well. I wish I had some advice or could help. I wish I knew what to do also or how to snap out of it.

That is good that you enjoy your job and that you work with supportive people...that does make a big difference.

Lollie45 · ‎10-10-2016

Just a follow up to my original post. I have forgotten what 'normal' feels like. I know all the things I could and should do but, without the energy or enthusiasm to do it is hard. What I would truely love but can't afford is a 'life coach' someone who is there by my side, second daily or weekly then monthly, guiding and teaching me how to get back into a 'routine' with everything from housework, cooking (I used to love cooking, hate it now or can't be bothered) someone who is a cheerleader and who I'd sort of have to be accountable to. I don't have a friend who could do this for me & my parents although are loving & supportive are too old. There should be a service like this that is cheap or free for people with chronic/clinical depression.

Charley60 · ‎11-10-2016

Hi Lollie45,im new to this forum, I've just read your post and I relate to it so well. I too, have no energy or inclination to do what I know has to be done. I'm at a loss as to what I can do to feel normal. I'm also on medication, but it doesn't seem to work and I have resorted to alcohol to try and numb these hopeless feelings of nothing.

ReeBecca · ‎11-10-2016

I know what you mean. It would be wonderful to have someone to give you guidance in getting things back on track. ai would live that as well. It is so hard when it gets to the point where its just all too much and you don't know where to even begin. Housework is such a huge burden I find as well..it really the last thing we need to worry about but it also feels so chaotic when its not done. It is so disheartening when it out of control and hard to get back on top of it isnt it.

Just wondering, do you have a partner? are they supportive?

Lollie45 · ‎11-10-2016

Hi reeBecca,

no I don't have a partner. I am divorced. Long story. I had an emotionally and verbally abusive husband. I had a son that was into drugs & crime and he was no support with all that, At the time I also had an 8 yo & 13yo to worry about as well.

I am suprised I have actually stayed 'sane' haha. My younger kids are what have kept me going but now the youngest is 14 and the most laziest kid I know and the 19 yo is working fulltime and has his own issues and I worry about how my depression has affected and still affects them. My eldest is still into drugs and I barely see him, which isn't entirely a bad thing sad to say. He's 23 and has his own path to follow.

My best friend has her own issues with her son and a sick elderly mother so I can't lean on her.

my parents are elderly too and I dissapoint my mother. She doesn't like the way I raise my kids or that my house is always untidy so she refuses to come here.

so essentially I have noone.