Smallwolf's Den

[smallwolf]

I have one thread that is my story. I have created one other thread that is a never ending story with a post appearing at random times. I thought about things that I had in games I played and one thing that came to mind was a home. I post replies to other's stories and at the end of the day go to bed. Sometimes there can be things I want to say that might not fit in my story or other threads.

So I decided to create this space where conversations might start and stop, change 180 degrees and go onto some some other tangent. You might have a question for me, or vice versa. Perhaps a place to shout or just get away.. so welcome to my den....

A wolf's den... a home... a place of safety. I will describe this space in a future place.

If you are looking for a chat, a space to share, come in and sit down around a small fire with a tea or coffee to recharge, for connection (?), re-imagination or anything else.

[AliasKind]

Howdy, the CWA it was nice, they were all retired ladies which is to be expected given that it was mid morning on a weekday but the prospects of forming a friendship aren't good. It's a little awkward to be on the outer of a cohesive group however they were all welcoming, I felt I sat there and didn't do a lot of talking, which is kind of in my nature. I struggle to think of things to say. I've always been the listener and don't people use those!

Tayla, how do you feel afterwards, going into the Chemist on your own? I'd like to think proud, I'm proud of you - seems like that was a big step. That's unfortunate people have been rude to you and laughed, more than unfortunate - sounds really very immature. Do you ever think and look at them, like their weird. I would, of course I can only imagine how this interplays with your anxiety and is an example of what fuels and perpetuates it. I'm so happy for you that you have a team of supportive Dr's, sounds like they were difficult to acquire.

I wish you both a wonderful day or at least wonderful moments within the day.

I'm off Ten Pin Bowling with a group I'm a part of, to help get me socialising and out of the house. It's only me and one other guy with the lady who runs it so again unlikely to form any friendships.

[Guest_4643]

Hey all.

AliasKind, good to hear the CWA thing was lovely. I miss those. Apparently there's a Pink Ribbon Brunch (which all goes to Cancer Charities, good cause and any excuse to eat, I'm in lol) in my town but I'm not sure if they're still doing it with COVID, and I don't know where it is, maybe in the Town Hall here, and not sure of the date. I read somewhere that you have to buy tickets but it includes a donation, food, drinks & Champagne (fancy haha). But it's all a good cause. I also read that they have more COVID seating so it must be the social distancing. I'll have to try and find more about it.

Thanks for the kind words. Yes I always think they're weird. I've been into Cafes by myself and sat in there whilst waiting for my food to get taken away and I've just been reading the paper while I've been waiting and people have laughed and I'm not even doing anything wrong. In one Fish & Chip shop, this lady laughed at me because I asked for a 1 piece snack box (1 fish, chips, 1 dim sim & 1 potato cake) but it was called something else so she laughed. It was nice food but I haven't been back, plus it's 3 hours away since we moved 2-3 years ago.

I miss 10 Pin Bowling, I wasn't that good at it but it was fun. Last time I went 10 Pin Bowling, I was in high school, about year 8 so 2013 I think. This guy wanted to go with me, I think he liked me because he hung out with me sometimes and used to try and flirt with me and sit next to me, and nominated me to do the Ice Bucket Challenge years ago on his video on Facebook, lol. He had some sort of illness or disability so I think it meant a lot to him that I was kind, which I try to be to everyone, because he had this special carer or something for him, who was nice and used to chat to me.

Take care all.

- Tayla

[AliasKind]

Howdy,

Tayla - Nothing wrong with asking for a snack box, in my opinion - makes complete sense. How is your day going? Mine has been a little slow. I honestly think if I had more things to do, my depression would lift immensely, of course I know it's up to me to find the things to do. There seems to be a real sticking point of not having to do anything, wishing I did have things to do, too not wanting to do the things I have to do. I'm not sure which one is more counter productive. Better not to get in my head about it I'd say, having things to do would give me other things to focus on, instead of going around and around.

I hope small wolf is ok, not sinking or struggling on his own. Thinking of you

Hope your having a nice day Tayla 🙂

[smallwolf]

Still here! 🙂

Had some things to do last night, and daughter's graduation today from highschool. Be around more tomorrow.

Tim

[AliasKind]

Good to hear, Tim. A graduation, that's a momentous occasion, congratulations to her and your family.

[smallwolf]

And she found out she got into Uni on the same day!

[Guest_4643]

Hey AliasKind & smallwolf.

Thank you. My days are usually boring, only go out walking and for the essentials like groceries, so I'm pretty housebound. Or if I go to appointments, that's all. Don't see my GP & Psychiatrist until December. I did have an appointment with my GP recently but I saw him 2 weeks before that so I thought I'd cancel and he was going to ask me if I found a Psychologist & I haven't yet, and I couldn't be bothered, because then he'd say that I wasn't trying and so on. Ugh. I understand how you feel about no motivation, etc to do anything. I'm wide awake at night then tired during the day but my body won't let me nap. I have insomnia and it sucks. Thinking of you both too.

- Tayla.

[AliasKind]

A bigger congratulations! That's fantastic.

Ughhh insomnia - how dreadful, I feel for you. Are you hoping your appointments in Dec will shed new light or bring about some positive change?

May you both have a lovely Sunday 🙂

[smallwolf]

Insomnia - have you had a sleep test done? My son as hypersomnia... the opposite of you - can sleep forever not does not necessarily feel the benefits!

Going to go back to GP on Wed. Might have high blood pressure. arrrghh!

[smallwolf]

For the next week I will be taking my blood pressure each day and night.

Tomorrow I see my psychologist!

Tired... I will lie down and recharge in this cave.

What if we recharged ourselves as much as we did with our phones?