Hi,
To start off, I would just like to say that I am a fairly young girl but I need help. There is a lot on my mind at the moment, so I have joined this online forum looking for help...
Firstly, I have lots and lots of friends outside of school and I guess I would consider myself popular between those people, and they are the best people I could ask for. But when I step into school I find myself surrounded by these people who only really treat me badly. I have a few friends there, but the people they hang out with are just so horrible. If they treat me like I am nothing and take the only friends I have away from me, how am I to cope? Do I try and fight for them or do I let them push me around, because knowing me; I wouldn't have the courage to stand up for myself. I met this one girl, who was my best friend just like that! But I went on my class camp, and all of a sudden; there is this other girl with her. I understood that she is allowed to have more than one friend, but she happened to choose a girl that hates me. Every time I actually get the courage to approach them all she does is steal my friend away and doesn't let her be with me. This is like a stab in the heart for me because what we shared was something truly special and I miss what we had.
Secondly, (this is more to do with anxiety) lately, every time something happens; big or small, but it hurts my feelings... I cry. But not just any crying, the type of crying when I have to leave the room, sit in the toilet getting scared because I cant stop. No matter what I do it doesn't stop and I am normally there for about 30-35 minutes waiting for it to stop. It has been happening for the past four weeks and it hasn't gotten any better or worse. I am seeing a counsellor about this but I would like some other advice for it because the more it happens, the more scared of it I get and I freak out every time it happens. Is this a form of anxiety? Because I don't really know what anxiety is and I want to have some kind of answer to why this crying thing is happening.
Lastly, these days I have become very self conscious of the way I look, am and sound like. I am always thinking in my head, and I am not classified as a pretty girl at my school. I have freckles, a weird nose, a horrible height, a low voice and the only thing I like when I look in the mirror is either what I am wearing, my hair (long, curly, brunette) and my eyes (rich blue). I also try to make people laugh sometimes by being funny, which never works; and sometimes I seem to forget I am trying to fit in and I go a little crazy and be my self. Mum always says, just be yourself and everyone will like you. Well, when I do be myself people judge me, and I am the type who can't handle being judged in a bad way.
I would really appreciate someone to reply because I need to serious help and I need answers to my problems, I am still only in year eight and I don't want to feel this way any longer.
Love Kitty xxx
