Life is so hard right now

[Booklover17]

Hi

Haven’t posted in a while but really struggling. In lockdown, have anxiety, live alone, can’t participate in singles bubble and going through a divorce. Anytime I have a conversation with someone it’s always like “well talk to you later.” I just wish just one person would stop saying this and just talk to me for a bit longer. I fee so lonely right now. It’s not like I can tel my friends/ family how I am feeling - they don’t get it and have not checked in with me at all - they seem to be unaware or don’t want to ask how I am really doing. I just want someone to talk to me.

[white knight]

Hi booklover

I find that although I'm a motivated, positive person, it's unrealistic to expect that elevated state to remain that way, especially if we have a mental issue where moods or depression is unpredictable.

So, through these swings and roundabouts we can time our launch into motivation when our moods dictates the best time or when a depressive cycle drifts away.

Below are several threads. If you like, just read the first post of each. Use Google (no obligations)

Beyondblue topic the timing of motivation

Beyondblue topic 30minutes can change your life

Beyondblue topic the best praise you'll ever get

Beyondblue topic switching mindsets

Beyondblue topic distraction and variety

Beyondblue topic worry worry worry

TonyWK

[Metal_kitty]

Hi Booklover.

Thanks for sharing. I joined last night and this is my first post.

It really is hard! I understand a fair bit of what you are dealing with.

I'm living in my forth house for the year. Seperating from my husband and step kids. Quit my career just before we broke up. I swear I'm the only single person and everyone I know is in long term relationships. So my head keeps asking what the hell is wrong with me. My saving grace is I moved into a joined house with massive shared backyard that my friend and her family own just before lockdown #6. So I have a bubble.

What I don't have is people to talk to. Who understand.

Happy to talk anytime with you. Would share a singles bubble with you if it was possible.

[Booklover17]

Hi Learn to Fly,

Thanks so much for your reply. That’s very true. The other problem is people take days to reply to my texts if at all. It’s not fair and I am done with being treated this way.

[Booklover17]

Hi Hanna,

Thanks so much for your reply and sorry to hear you are going through similar things. There is a park but I am on the strictest lockdown so no/one stops to chat. Also live in a big city and people are not that chatty. Won’t put my cat’s name here just coz I want to stay anonymous but she is a tabby and a real comfort to me. I hope you can find some more friends soon. Sam is really cute 🙂

[Booklover17]

Hi Sophia,

Thanks so much for your reply. I reach out to my friends a lot but they don’t reach out to me or they take days to reply to my texts. I can’t do it anymore. My family also doesn’t understand they are old school and don’t talk about their feelings much.

[Booklover17]

Thank you Tony

[Booklover17]

Hi Metal Kitty

Thanks so much for your reply and well done to you on your first post! The first is the hardest. I am so glad you have people around. Mine are all in long term relationships too and they don’t understand what I am going through.

[Learn to Fly]

Hi Booklover17,

If somebody doesn’t respond straight away, or even within the same day, I don’t take it personally as everyone have their own busy lives so I get it. But after few days, that’s a bit on the “I have some better things to do” side. What is your view in this?

[Booklover17]

Hi Learn to Fly,

If they don’t respond in the same day yes I take it personally. Anyone can take 5 minutes at lunch or after work to respond. My friends take at least 3 days to respond usually - I find that ridiculous. I am with you on them thinking they have better things to do yes. I am done. I am always the one reaching out more and I get nothing back.

[Hanna3]

Hi again Booklover17

I've decided here I'd people don't respond after I've suggested catching up a couple of times I write them off. I just feel bad about myself if I keep trying!

I think meeting through common interests is the best way and through work.

Unfortunately lockdowns are making this difficult for those of us who live alone!

I have long ago accepted I am happy if I have just a couple of friends. Anyone else may just be an acquaintance I chat with sometimes which is OK.

Cats are great!

I'm about to do music lessons via Zoom this week. Is there anything you can do online during the lockdown to at least give you a bit of company even though it's not what you need it's better than no company?

I do enjoy chatting with people here and we've been talking for a long time now even though we've never met in person.

Keep talking here when you feel like it and you can join in other threads. Hang in there! 🙂🐾🎶🦚