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Chris_B Forums etiquette: give support to receive support
  • replies: 0

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newb... View more

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newbies are welcomed when they first post, and we understand that it’s a big step to post for the first time on a forum like this, especially if you aren’t feeling great. It’s important to remember, though, that these forums are a community of real people, just like you, not a one-on-one support environment like going to see your psychologist. To get the best out of being here, one of the best tips we can offer is give support to receive support. Being a good community member means: participating in different threads (not just your own), replying to people who have taken the time to reply to you (even if it’s just to say thank you), and... posting words of emotional support and encouragement when you see others who are hurting and reaching out. You don’t have to feel obliged to solve the problems of others: that’s not what we’re here for. But you can offer empathy and what you’ve learned from your own life experiences, even if it’s just a line or two, eg. “I don't know what to say, but I want to give you my support and tell you I care about what is happening to you and hope life will get better soon.” Try to develop an interest in the journeys of others here on the forums. You may be surprised at how good being an active, caring member here can make you feel. For those of you who have had good experiences giving support here on the forums, please post in this thread here and let us know how it has helped you on your journey.

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Mary4670 Fear of death is crippling me
  • replies: 4

I was raised in a strict Christian household but rejected my religious upbringing as a teenager. For many years I have considered myself agnostic. Rejecting religion was difficult for my family who continue to encourage me to return to it. This is so... View more

I was raised in a strict Christian household but rejected my religious upbringing as a teenager. For many years I have considered myself agnostic. Rejecting religion was difficult for my family who continue to encourage me to return to it. This is something I simply can't do. I've been through a few traumas in my life but nothing that many people before me haven't experienced. Eg sexual abuse as a child, infidelity, divorce. I have been stoic through any trials that come my way and most people would tell you I appear calm and collected. Over the past 6 months however, my fear of death (not particularly just mine but the death of those around me) has plagued me. My parents are elderly and I am a single parent. I'm horrified and heartbroken at the thought of their death. My parents will die soon and while most people would be very sad but appreciative of their long life, I am bereft. I spend hours in tears at the thought they might die. The idea of burying them and having them decay and rot in the ground terrifies me. I know they believe they will go to a beautiful place and be with their loved ones in heaven but all I see is decaying flesh and their bodies being consumed by insects. Lately I have been thinking that once my children move on with their lives and leave there may be no further point in living for me. My mind has turned to how I might carry that out. I have friends, interests and a good career, but none of this seems to help. The thought that something might happen to my children also paralyses me with fear. I could never bury my children and go on living. I know rationally that there is no reason for this to happen but I watch the news and see tragedy everywhere. Why should I be exempt? I see people go to family funerals and be extremely sad, but I break down at the thought of people dying that I don't even know. When I think of going to my own parent's funeral I am uncontrollably heartbroken and it saps my will to live. I'm afraid that when the day comes that I have to bury a parent that I will reach breaking point. I am not someone who ever falls apart publicly, but I can feel this coming like a wave that's about to crash and drown me.

iamanon Please dont judge me
  • replies: 11

My name is... lets just call me anon21. For years now ive faced depression and social anxiety that I swear borders on agoraphobia. I'm also insanely paranoid to the point I cover all camera lenses on all my digital device and have massive trust issue... View more

My name is... lets just call me anon21. For years now ive faced depression and social anxiety that I swear borders on agoraphobia. I'm also insanely paranoid to the point I cover all camera lenses on all my digital device and have massive trust issues (I got a new phone 2 months ago, havent been able to answer a single call). I've faced a lot of judgment and have faced several issues that have made me scared of all that is outside my home. This ranges from being bullied throughout my school years to being beaten black and blue by my "friends at the time" while it was filmed and i was laughed at by a crowd of at least 20 people at a train station during the incident. I was set up by them regarding something that was not their business, totally unjustified. I'm guessing thats a primary factor towards my massive trust issues. After this incident, I didnt leave my home for 11 months, I couldn't even set foot in my backyard. Years have passed since then and i still find myself in the same situation, though I occasionally force myself to leave the house just so I can say to myself "See, this isnt so bad, you're just as safe here as you are at home". Whenever i go out, I have this thought recurring in my head saying "you shouldnt be here, its not safe", Regardless of the place. Recently it has started manifesting itself in physical ways and whenever im out, for every second, I feel like im going to wet myself, regardless of previous toilet trips. I couldnt even stay the night at my best mates (known for 9 years) place 2 weeks ago without having to go home due to almost having an anxiety attack. Having already being a sufferer of Depression, The feeling that my bedroom is a prison has added weight onto it, I feel hopeless. I had to leave my previous workplace due to the anxiety/depression, which didnt feel good as I let down the people I worked with and didnt provide notice or a reason why I left. I self harmed for a long period of time but havent in years now, Just as well, I could never feel good working in short sleeves due to my scars. I'm considering applying for DSP due to the fact that I dont see myself as being fit to work due to my psychological issues which have started causing physical distress, Would this be a viable idea? Could someone also provide information on whether or not centrelink will pay for a psychologist for me? (Not that it would be easy for me to get to with my conditions) P.S had an anxiety attack posting this as its so personal.

hearn99 do i have anxiety?
  • replies: 3

Hi i'm 15 and i don't know if i have anxiety or not? I've looked through the symptoms and i can name a few that are similar to mine like not long ago my parents split up over an affair involving abuse and all that and i've been having terrible nightm... View more

Hi i'm 15 and i don't know if i have anxiety or not? I've looked through the symptoms and i can name a few that are similar to mine like not long ago my parents split up over an affair involving abuse and all that and i've been having terrible nightmares of those scenes and i keep picturing these scenes at school and at home. I find it hard to concentrate on simple things and i've become very bad at remembering what im doing and what im saying like i forget what im talking about halfway through a sentence. i get scared of going out of the house and going to school and i panic over a lot of things. i haven't told anyone but my friends have started to notice strange things that im doing. What does all this mean?

gmc Have you been through this?
  • replies: 8

Hello everyone, I've been for around 1 week and a half on this forums and I am deeply thankful for the support I've received from the wonderful people here. I try to read all your stories and in time return all the great support. I've decided to open... View more

Hello everyone, I've been for around 1 week and a half on this forums and I am deeply thankful for the support I've received from the wonderful people here. I try to read all your stories and in time return all the great support. I've decided to open another post to talk about something that's on my mind for a long long time, since I can't remember. I get very enthusiastic about some plans and even decisions I make sometimes and after I express them, how I feel and what do I plan to do, it seems like it all gets away, like it's not mine and everything it's hopeless, I can't do it anymore, it was a bad decision. Even if I want it badly, I get back to what my mom sometimes says, that I'd be better if I wouldn't want "that much"... Or I don't think about it too much to see if it's a good decision or not. Last time it happened today. I decided I'd follow a master program in psychology, something I want to do for a while, and be an arts therapist specialised in theatre, as acting is a big passion of mine. Talking to my mom about it and how excited I am to have decided this, I felt very awkward about my own dream. I think that I am too confused, that I am desperately thinking of a reason to live, actually, that I feel the presure from my parents that I have to follow my studies, that depression and anxiety are controlling my life and I have to do something about it, that maybe I don't follow my passion for psychology and acting because I am too scared or my parents even if they would support me, they wouldn't agree with my choice... I don't know. It's like too much going on. So I hope you get that I won't even tell you about the almost unbearable level of anxiety I've been through, but the story (or better said the adventure) of finding a good specialist to treat me is in another thread. And I don't live in Australia. Have you been through this, through feeling that thoughts are not anymore yours as you put it in spoken words?

jrb having a hard time
  • replies: 5

I'm struggling day by day & i can't find anything to be happy about. I'm having a hard time with my anxiety & depression and sometimes i just want to give in but i have to tell myself just try to cope with these feelings. My anxiety started when i wa... View more

I'm struggling day by day & i can't find anything to be happy about. I'm having a hard time with my anxiety & depression and sometimes i just want to give in but i have to tell myself just try to cope with these feelings. My anxiety started when i was in high school where i was bullied everyday for five years. I hid the bruises from my mum and dad because i wanted to handle it myself until the middle of year twelve when i lifted my shirt and showed them the bruises and they were very upset i didn't come to them.

CSmith Mixed anxiety-depression - let's talk about it.
  • replies: 5

I have had troubles with anxiety for as long as I can remember, but it wasn't until I was diagnosed with mixed anxiety-depression (this year), that I actually realised that how I have been living is very energy-consuming and no healthy. There are tim... View more

I have had troubles with anxiety for as long as I can remember, but it wasn't until I was diagnosed with mixed anxiety-depression (this year), that I actually realised that how I have been living is very energy-consuming and no healthy. There are times when I feel absolutely fine and can talk to anyone without felling self-conscious or worthless, but there are other times when the anxiety is so bad that I just repeat negative and hurtful thoughts about myself in my mind, like my own mantra. I go to university and find it quite difficult to walk into a room that has more than a few people in it. If I am late to class, I usually don't go. But the main thing that gets me is that when I look around and see people being so carefree and completely comfortable in their own skin, it makes me hate myself more and I often get very emotional about this. I feel like I put more pressure on myself to be better than I can, because it shouldn't actually be this hard. What I really want is to be able to enjoy my life and not feel so trapped within my own body. I am trying to meditate when I can, but so far I don't think that much of a change has occurred. I am also talking to a counsellor regularly, and this has helped me work through some of my issues. Are there any other ideas for dealing with anxiety and/or depression (besides medication) that anyone thinks are beneficial?

Jenni Post Traumatic Stress Disorder - seeking help
  • replies: 5

Hi, I'm hoping someone can recommend a very good psychiatrist who specialises in PTSD in Melbourne. My partner has been diagnosed with PTSD (from childhood abuse) and severe clinical depression and none of his psychs so far seem to be able to get the... View more

Hi, I'm hoping someone can recommend a very good psychiatrist who specialises in PTSD in Melbourne. My partner has been diagnosed with PTSD (from childhood abuse) and severe clinical depression and none of his psychs so far seem to be able to get their head around it. The psychiatrist will need to be able to handle an incredibly intelligent, analytical and "needs to be in control" individual, also preferably someone who is strong on therapy rather than medication. Any suggestions would be really appreciated as he is in such a terrible space at the moment and only heading downwards. Thank you

vip Chewing gum and anxiety
  • replies: 11

Hi everyone people constantly ask me why do you chew gum all the time. Well when I did my therapy groups we were all told one side effect of this antidepressant medication is that it can ruin your teeth. Good dental care is essential as I go to my de... View more

Hi everyone people constantly ask me why do you chew gum all the time. Well when I did my therapy groups we were all told one side effect of this antidepressant medication is that it can ruin your teeth. Good dental care is essential as I go to my dentist every 6 months and chewing gum keeps your mouth fresh and I find in the mornings especially I feel anxious so by chewing a little it helps calm me down . Can anyone else relate to this ????? And I also have funny traits with my anxiety it makes me cough for no reason , move around a lot talk really fast give limited eye contact breathe fast when I speak I can have a nervous feel in my words does anyone experience this feeling with anxiety???? would love some feedback please

Corey_G Eating Disorders and Body Dysmorphic Disorders among men
  • replies: 2

An increasing number of studies into the matter of eating disorders and body dysmorphic disorders among men, have shown a stead increase in the number of reported cases within Australia. The increase in reported cases is likely to be a consequence of... View more

An increasing number of studies into the matter of eating disorders and body dysmorphic disorders among men, have shown a stead increase in the number of reported cases within Australia. The increase in reported cases is likely to be a consequence of a number of factors including society's ideal version of a 'man' and/ or increased awareness of the issue, thereby assisting doctors in diagnosing and treating these disorders much more effectively than it had been previously. Recently, the toy manufacturer, Hasbro, was criticised for its design of a 'Winx Club' doll, which featured 'stick-thin legs'. It was argued that such representation through the use of toys, which are marketed to children, creates an unrealistic idea of beauty, thereby contributing to the prevalence of such disorders. After hearing this story, it got me think about male action figures and how, if at all, could they be contributing to the increased prevalence of these body image disorders? For example, take the Hulk, whose aesthetic is excessively muscular and tough in character. Arguably, applying the same principle that was argued the 'Winx Club' dolls, could these action heroes, which children being young often idolise, be contributing to societies skewed perception of what a 'man' should look like. More specifically on the issue of muscularity, the concept of 'Muscular Dysmorphia' establishes the basis of a disorder in which a person becomes obsessed with the idea that they are not muscular enough. In this disorder a person is preoccupied with thoughts conceding appearance, especially musculature. A few risk factors may contribute to this disorder: family disharmony, perfectionism, severe stress, aesthetics focus and negative influence of mass culture that promotes an idealised body. Do you believe that disorders regarding body image among men, could reasonably be attributed, in part, to children's action figures like the Hulk, particularly with respect to the physical aesthetics of such action figures . Also, if anyone has experienced pressure to change or modify certain features of themselves as a result of society's perception of what is 'normal' or 'acceptable' with respect to eating disorders and body dysmorphic disorders and what you believe contributed to your experience with the disorder?

Banefish Too many feelings, too many thoughts
  • replies: 1

Hello, I've recently moved away from my parents home for the first time and am now living with a friend in Victoria. This move is complicated because I got into a little bit of a ''online relationship'' with my friends ex when I was planning the move... View more

Hello, I've recently moved away from my parents home for the first time and am now living with a friend in Victoria. This move is complicated because I got into a little bit of a ''online relationship'' with my friends ex when I was planning the move and we now all live together.