Never good enough at work

[Ray24]

Hi all, this is my first post so..

I am a 24yo male and have had on average 1 job per year since I was 16, and every one I have felt inferior and it affects me pretty badly.

I am currently an adult apprentice, which i go to training once a week and work 4 days a week. I am top of my class at tech and I find the electrical industry so interesting, i'd love to study it forever... but the work...

My boss constantly gives unreachable deadlines, and expects me to get things perfect first time, even though i am a first year. This, along with my depression/anxiety (medicated for 4 years) is causing my feelings of inferiority to get so much worse. I strongly believe that I am not good enough at anything to even continue doing it... i feel, and am made to feel even more, like i am constantly just making mistakes, not learning quick enough, doing stupid things, daydreaming, asking the wrong questions about the wrong things (even though to me they are legitimate and serious). My tech trainer seems to think i am good enough to teach the subject to the next generation if i get qualified, but my on-site performance is apparently horrible...

Also required 15 minutes early everyday, not paid but scolded if i am not (even if i am 10 mins early)

Hasnt paid a single bit of my superannuation

Very aggressive when teaching or "disciplining"

tries to start arguements when in bad moods

None of this helps my situation but it just gives you a better view of my situation. he also knows my problems but believes depression can be fixed simply by changing the way you look at stuff and can be done in a day...

I dont know i could probably write a book about my issues, but i just want some advice, maybe someone else who has been through the same stuff... sorry if this sounds like im whining, but i have had some really horrible bosses and i start to think i am the problem...

[BballJ]

Hi Ray24,

Firstly, welcome to the forums. Good on you for breaking the barrier and posting your story. Hopefully you can get some clarity and answers.

I personally think not everyone is cut out to be a "boss"... leadership skills are not generally just there in most people, they are developed and finding a good boss is very hard.. especially one who understands mental illness. Unfortuntly your boss has a prehistoric thought on depression which does not make it easy for you so I understand where you are coming from and why you feel the way you feel. I don't think I have ever met an apprentice who had an easy first year.. they always seem to almost haze them to a degree which I find odd. I feel like your tech trainer understands your skills where you boss doesn't realise you are still a first year and wanting you to preform like a fully qualified. You are an apprentice, you are allowed to make mistakes.

I haven't directly been through this so I cannot offer likeminded advice, I just wanted to reply to let you know you your story was heard and you certainly are not whining, feel free to post back as much as you wish and I can tell you are certainly not the problem either.

My best for you,

Jay

[Guest_322]

Hi Ray,

I'm glad Jay responded so thoughtfully to your thread.

Your work situation- specifically your volatile, demanding and often unreasonable boss- seems to be really chipping away at your self esteem.

I agree with Jay that your tech trainer has more realistic expectations than your boss, and that your boss' criticisms aren't a fair reflection of your skills and aptitude. Your glowing tech reviews and recommendations are testimony to your ability.

I don't think you're whining so there's no need to apologise. I have to admit that I don't have any similar personal experiences.

But for what it's worth, I was wondering if it's a possibility for you to look for another job to finish your apprenticeship? Sorry, I'm not sure how apprenticeships work. Perhaps there's career/work advisors at your tech to speak to?

Also, re: your boss not paying your superannuation seems very dodgy. Double check this as I'm neither an accountant nor a lawyer but I'm pretty sure employers have a legal obligation to pay mandatory superannuation of at least 9.5% of your wage/salary. Again, please double check this...

Sorry you're doing it tough. I hope things improve further down the track.

Dottie x

[Shanequa]

Hi there so glad to hear someone in a similar position to me.

Im not in the same work as you I work in age care however my boss is a bully as well and expects unreasonable work to be done.

Im not sure what advice I can offer you but please know that you're not alone and I hope it works out for you.

[pipsy]

Hi Ray. Your boss sounds like a bully. He is using his position to stand-over and bully you. Ordering you to start 15 minutes early without pay is not on, unless agreed to by workers and bosses. He actually sounds too, as though he is testing your endurance to see how far he can push. How does he treat other workers? Perhaps start noting his treatment of your colleagues. If you can prove bullying, you have the right to report it as bullying has been raised before on these forums and others who have been treated similar have complained. I realize how hard it can be to prove bullying, but it is possible. You would need to take note of his treatment if you don't arrive 15 minutes early, plus the non-payment of extra pay for arriving early. Non pay for earlier start is actually classed as o/time. His aggression on teaching, mood swings, treatment of you when you are not well, this includes your depression and how he puts you down for it. The nonpayment of your super is actually illegal I think (better get some advice on that one). Once you get enough to charge him with bullying, a lawyer would be able to help you. Some lawyers work on a 'no win, no fee' system. A Dr would no doubt be willing to testify as to your depression and the severity of it.

Lynda