Hi Rizza, welcome to beyond blue forums
Oh boy, this is a top question and one I am very interested in. I was nicknamed the "worrier" as a ten by teachers. Excess worry is a sign of anxiety which can develop into more serious issues later.
I cant tell you how bad guilt can be. I'm 59yo and when 19yo I was in a fight with my room mate when I was in the armed forces. He got off worse for wear and I had left a scar on his forehead. Some time later I sought a discharge and then rode 6 hours to where he was stationed to apologise. I passed him driving in a main street and pulled him over. He didn't know it was me as I wore a helmet. When I took the helmet off he asked what I wanted and I told him I was sorry for leaving him with that large scar. He told me to leave him alone and he drove way.
Fast track to 2012 (yes, 37 years later) and I looked him up on Facebook and there he was. I sent him a message of regret and hoped he was ok. The next thing I know his Facebook had extra privacy measures.
I have asked myself a thousand time when can I rid myself of this act? I've passed the situation onto other for their views and no one would punish themselves this much.
Having said that I do know there are some guidelines to rid yourself of guilt. Firs tis to understand its origin. I believe it comes form one parent in my case a controlling mother that forced guilt upon me and my sister to massive levels. She was never satisfied with us...we could never please her enough. We were always worried about if she was happy with us or not. Secondly lack of confidence. This can come from not achieving when you are expected to achieve. We often get this from young people on this forum when their academic levels aren't good and they feel obligated to reach certain levels while their own wish is to leave school and pursue a career in the workplace.
Guilt, worry, lack of confidence all can lead to serious health consequences. These extreme symptoms need IMO some counselling beginning with your GP. With mental illness the preferred avenue is prevention rather than cure because most sufferers of anxiety, depression, PTSD and the like will attest that once you have any of these issues you need to manage it rather than expecting a cure.
By the way eventually in our 50's my sister and I realised our mother was not a positive force in our lives and we no longer see her. And that is one action one can take of many to self help. Sorting your life out.
Tony WK
