Hello - I'm struggling with the Covid restrictions

[MELLY01]

Usually I'm extremely active. What I would do in a day some don't do in a week. I have been making do for so long but it's getting hard now. I'm scared losing my fitness and strength. Something I worked so hard to get. I'm missing laughing and training with people.

I have tried non active things and active things to compensate but they are just time wasting fill ins to ease the tension of not having an adrenaline release. I make it through another week or two and the restrictions are extended. It's draining not knowing when it will end. I'm tired from the stress and want to hide in bed. I've felt like hiding for few days so I thought I would come here. I'm not sure if this is the right place but it's a start.

[jaz28]

Hi Melly01,

I know COVID lockdowns can be isolating and frustrating! Do you live alone? Are you allowed to visit someone for "compassionate reasons"? Could that be an option where you are? Video chat is also nice when alone.

Do you have space to work out at home? Or go for a run? I know it sucks, but we can only make do with what we have until restrictions are eased.

Or there are new hobbies you could learn... I don't know! Try to practice mindfulness and stay positive, and use this time to rest your busy body.

If you are struggling - reach out to someone or Lifeline 13 11 14, or the Beyond Blue helpline.

Stay safe,

Jaz.

[Summer Rose]

Hi Melly01

Welcome to the bb forum and thank you for sharing your story. I think you’ve made a great start!

I’m so sorry that you’re struggling with the loss of your fitness activities. I want to encourage you to keep active in all the ways you can. It’s not perfect, I know, but it’s something and better than nothing.

I think that we are all grieving the loss of something or someone during this pandemic. You are not alone. Bb has some relevant material on the Coronavirus website that you might find helpful.

I find two things help to keep me positive when I’m grieving what I’ve lost because of Covid and I’d rather just hide in bed. One is to remind myself of all the things I have in life to be grateful for. The second is to find a way to help another person each day.

I’m wondering if it might help you to create an online social group with your exercise/gym mates. Chances are that they too are missing the social connection and it could be something really special for all of you. If that sounds overwhelming, give a mate a call and just talk. Hopefully you’ll be able to have a laugh, too.

Take good care. Kind thoughts to you

[MELLY01]

Thank you for your message. I don't do live chat, never have felt comfortable with that.

I have things I can do but my spark and love for anything is gone. I'm just doing it to get by but for how long? I run, I work, I have family, pets. My sport was my therapy and it's gone. The social aspect of it, they were my mates. Sport was a way to forget about the drudgery of normal suburban life. Sure I'm greatful for many things. But it's not good enough to be strung on week to week in lockdown. It feels cruel, regardless of the logic.

I have bought a trampoline and water colour paints to give me some other things to do. I'm just waiting for them to arrive.

Writing was once a creative outlet. I used to write about fun things, alas invention is difficult in my current mindset. As for helping, I spend most my days helping others. Visiting a friend who's injured, checking if everyone is ok, and in my work.

No one would really want to know how I'm going. It's too difficult and sounds selfish.

Really I'm withdrawing from having high doses of adrenaline coursing through me to zero. I have tried replacing it with nicotine for 8 weeks or so but I decided to quit on that. I really don't know anyone who could appreciate what it feels to grieve for what I've lost. Grieving is grgrieving.i don't want to lose my strength, fitness and gusto which is extremely hard to replicate outside of my sports club and gym.

Atm I highspeed roller-skate a few times a week (alone), run 5km every day(alone), do some weights(alone), eat well(alone), don't drink, have a Loving family who all do there own thing. Yet, this has grabbed at me so very tight. Even if I can just vent here and have one person understand rather than try fix me would be great. I'm doing all I can already to try fix myself, but I just don't find joy in it. Omg I sound so complainy. Sorry.

I know I need to have something to feel good about. A skate and a 5km run doesn't cut it. I do not want to be a person who's life keeps shrinking but I have to accept and settle just to pretend everything is ok. I'm scared of the future as there's no reassurance or stability.

[MELLY01]

Hi Jay, no I don't live alone. Thank you I will keep active or I will perish internally. It certainly is reducing to know I'm not the only one who has felt like hiding. When I hide or feel it I get myself up and out of it. It's just really shit to go to that place to begin with. It's tiring. I can't begin to imagine how hard every day could be for some with complex depressive issues. So yeah I feel pathetic for being so down when I have so much to be greatful for . But you're right , I'm grieving and it's a process. I just want a place where I can grieve I guess, while I try make sense of some short term future xx

[MELLY01]

Sorry Jaz 🌹

[Sophia16]

Hi Melly,

I feel you. I am currently in NSW and it feels like the restrictions are never going to end. However, I still have hope. Having hope is the only thing we have to hold on to during this tough time.

I used to go to the gym 5 times a week and now it's closed. I use this fitness app that has really motivated me. It's called 'workout for women'. You can choose whatever workout you want, there's a timer for each workout and there is a woman doing it with you.

Video calling your friends can be a really helpful way to distract yourself from what's going on. House party is a great app where you can play games with your friends whilst calling.

Let's hope everything comes to an end.